Mimic
by SunMoonKunochi
Summary: Many considered it funny, or weird, or disturbing. I treasured it. Imagine my surprised when I was tongue raped and dragged through darkness, to find that my talent was considered something amazing, and deadly. It was okay though, I had an everyday, kitchen appliance in my hand, a slowly fracturing mind, and ridicuously large chakra reserves to boot. Self-insert with a fun twist.
1. Opening Scene: Mimic age 14

**Hiya, this is just an idea I have to get down because it's irritating me so much. This is a real self-insert, the idea is something I haven't seen before and I'm excited about it. The character and all her quirks are based off me, I'm serious that all this stuff is truthful (either than her eyes, but whatever).**

**This is a preview as I'm writing my other story 'Kunoichi say what.' Just tell me if it's a good idea or not, thanks!**

* * *

I stood slightly nervously in front of the class, moving schools sucked.

Especially if you were moving in year eight.

The teacher, Mrs J-something asked me to do an introduction, okay, didn't seem too hard. Looking anywhere, but at the curious kids eyes, I spoke as clearly as I could with my accent.

"Hi, my name is Alice Clostar. I'm fourteen years old in two months, I moved to this selective school from a public school a few suburbs over. I like many things and I hate too many people," I grinned weakly at them, "I'm also a mimicker."

The whole mimicking business started not too long ago. At a young age there was nothing special about little ol' me, barring my aptitude for contact sports and trying my best to be a boy. I didn't care too much and it was perfectly fine to my family.

Not so much to the kids in primary school.

To my credit I didn't do the cliché, come home bawling my eyes out, or cutting, or suicide. I simply sat there and imagined that I was drop kicking the bastard a hundred metres.

I had a small group of friends, a good sense of humour and was hated by majority of my year for some unknown reason.

At the age of eleven, while I was in year five, I had developed a strange new habit. Everyone dismissed it as being funny, but I found it horrifying, I had a vocal tick.

Yeah laugh it up but it sucked big time, every once in a while I would blurt out a word or phrase completely, and utterly not on purposely. Year five it was stupid words like 'tawesome,' or 'skillfish.' **(A/N: These are all true things for me.) **And by halfway through the year, it had gotten stranger.

I was calmly minding my business in class after finishing my work. My teacher was helping other kids and try as I could, I couldn't wait for the teacher to finish explaining the questions. Maths was a bit hard, but English flowed easily for me and I was now staring out the window bored out of my fricking mind!

The usual.

Out of nowhere my throat got an _urge. _I really couldn't explain the sudden _need _to do something. I opened my mouth, pushing air out, and imagine my surprise when my throat seemed to jump and beat itself. A high pitched chattering noise came out of my mouth and distracted the whole class.

I had made a fucking dolphin noise.

Of course to the class it was hilarious, and as everyone roared with laughter, I wanted to sink to the deepest depths of the ocean and drown myself in my sorrows.

But not everyone could win.

It got worse as the word seemed to spread and people continued to ask me to do it. I was happy to do it at the start as it seemed to make people laugh and enjoy it. It was a bitch slap to the face to see the bitches of the year openly point at me, laugh and call me a weirdo.

Ignoring them I continued to ace my class and eventually made it to year six at the top class. I had also aced the art of surprising myself with strange noises.

It gave me a heart attack every time I felt my throat doing something unexpected and new.

I could mimic dogs, cats, horses, snakes, walruses? Seagulls, kookaburras, lyre bird. The list could go on.

But it wasn't just animals I could mimic, a baby's cry, train, waves, cartoon sound effects (falling sound, etc), crowd cheering, chainsaws (loved that one!) and easily my favourite, ticking bombs and explosions!

For goods sake I could even mimic the sound of that bird Kevin off UP.

After a quick trip to my mother's homeland of Ireland (I was Australian) and a side trip to England and Thailand, I returned home with the English and Irish accent down pat. I continued to listen to other people's accents and managed to mimic French, Japanese, Scottish and Indian. But after mimicking and practising the accents for so long they got mixed up with my own voice.

The kids got a new target in teasing when they found my voice wouldn't go back to normal.

My family merely accepted what was going on and I finally joined my older brother in high school.

That also meant I had to explain the accent, the mimicking and the vocal ticks that were **still **plaguing me!

High school was a bitch of a place and my friends eventually left me for popularity. That was okay since I had a new and improved version of my friend. The Library!

I spent more and more time there until I spent my lunchtimes working behind the counter leasing out books. That was when I discovered the brightly coloured books that sat hidden behind the counter.

Fairy Tail was the first manga I had ever read and I fell in love with the bright animation and people. I caught up with the manga and watched the anime in record time, I wandered around for a bit until I found a very familiar person.

Naruto was something I remembered watching on Cheese TV at a young age. **(A/N: Who remembers Cheese TV out of the Australians?!) **I quickly fell back into a pattern of speedily reading the manga and blitzing through the anime.

Reading/watching the series actually helped me through the shitty time I had at high school. My grades were even higher in visual art after I mimicked the manga art style. Japanese was something I excelled at after memorising voices and their words.

Although it was embarrassing when 'tebayo became my new vocal tick. It was even more embarrassing when a boy in my class knew exactly where it was from.

I finally finished year seven and the very next day I got initiated into a selective school for smart kids.

I started the year hoping to be more accepted (it helped we were all smart rejects), and to refine my talent.

I ignored the few curious looks from the kids and sat down next to a short girl who seemed fairly kind, if a bit spunky.

After a full school year I realsied school life was the best it had ever been and after making a few friends, I actually felt like I had made it somewhere in life.

Thank the gods!

People encouraged my talent and I aced the start of music when I found out I could mimic singers voices.

It sounded awesome every time I sung like Rihanna, or rapped like Macklemore. I mimicked famous people's voices and continuously used Morgan Freemans' ultra sexy voice.

With great talent comes great sexiness.

Finishing my first school year at my school with good grades and a good mindset I prepared myself for a whole new year, with electives!

Doing Japanese and visual arts was fun and all, but life became more sweeter when I got a job!

It was a good paying job at a small pizza place right near my seaside town house. I worked counter, dishie and prep (preparing the food), and loved it a lot.

In fact **The Incident **happened as I was walking home from my five till eight thirty shift.

Edging through a throng of drunk, party goers I was surprised to see absolutely no one near me. Shrugging it off as a rare phenomenon, I continued my way down the boulevard.

I knew I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help myself as I heard a strange rattling noise coming from one of the rare alleyways that came off from the boulevard.

Creeping closer I called out softly, "hello? Anyone there?" Hearing no answer I crept in closer, the rattling sound had stopped, but the hairs on my neck hadn't settled down yet.

Shivering as a sudden cold swept across the adventure time t-shirt and bright orange, denim shorts I had changed into after work. Rubbing my bare arms I kept close to the wall as I walked in further, I could've had sworn that the alleyways weren't this long.

I foolishly ignored the sense of foreboding, and nostalgia? That swept across me, I called out again, "sir? Madam? Is anyone there?"

I nearly wet myself as an answering growl was heard. Was there a feral dog in here or something?

I slowly began shifting back, but stopped when a purple and black blur _passed through me_ and doused me in icy coldness. I slowly turned fearfully and bit back a scream at the ghoulish face I saw.

A dull purple face stared at me with its glowing yellow eyes that stood out more against its _black _of its eyes. They were supposed to be white! I flicked my eyes to the pointed horns that contrasted with the spiky, white hair **IT** sprouted.

The clinking of beads drew my attention to the red, bead necklace that nestled in the middle of the open chest robe **IT** was wearing. I gulped as I looked back at the watchful, yellow eyes that seemed to be staring right into my soul.

**IT **didn't have its usual knife in its mouth but I knew who **IT **was instinctively. I bowed deeply, "Shingami-sama," I managed to blurt out as my heart threatened to traitorously ditch me through my mouth.

I felt the cold gaze even as I bowed and I pulled away from the idea of trying to shove away and escape from a _fricking death god!_ A mythological one at that!

I was confused and scared witless, that usually meant I went into full retard mode or the ever silent, moody adult.

I was fortunate my body decided on being mature for once.

"Human," hissed out a voice that made me want to either pass out, or attempt to kill myself from the pressure and coldness that emanated from it. Claw like hands pulled at my chin and I could only stare in horror as I had to look **IT **in the eye.

"I have taken too many souls far too early," hissed Shingami, I didn't even know the thing could talk! "Too many souls have been taken," yeah I got that buddy, "and it needs to be repaid!" Ohhhhh fuck.

It seemed to grin slightly, whatever it was, it freaked the shit out of me! "Your soul is bright mortal," I don't like where this is going! I especially didn't like the claw-like hands that crept towards me, "balance is needed!" The claws pulled at my unwilling face until they slowly managed to pry my mouth open. And I was exposed to my first kiss.

That is, if you call a tongue being shoved two thirds down your throat by a death god a kiss.

Go ahead, I don't know what you do in your free time.

Coldness began to spark inside of me and even as Shingami retreated, I was paralysed well and truly. The coldness burned and ate its way through my throat, where the tongue of Shingami had been. My voice box suddenly grated and shifted, I could feel it twisting and _changing itself. _I let out a scream as darkness began to close over me, and screamed again at the inhumane sound that was coming from my throat. The god had fucked with my one valuable tool! I managed to scowl slightly through my pain, even as I fell back into the cool darkness.

The hissing, shiveringly cold voice of the death god seemed to echo through my mind and I swear to Kami I felt my mind begin to fracture slightly, just a splinter of insanity. Surrendering to that morbid thought, I let myself be dragged down into the depths of the cold that gripped me everywhere.

* * *

Kakashi stared warily at the girl before him. He had been walking the streets to home after the tiresome ordeal in Wave. Of course his fucking morals just _had _to make him stop to help what seemed an adolescent girl on the street.

He scanned over her with a critical eye, he could see the slight rise and fall of her slightly endowed chest and the jump of a pulse in her tanned wrists. There were no visible signs of injury on her tanned skin either than old scar wounds on her knuckles and legs. There wasn't a sign of a struggle which ruled out a civilian mugging or raping.

He sniffed the air experimentally and finally approached when he couldn't smell any poisons or tranquilisers. Judging by the slight sprawl and calm demeanour of her body, the girl had fainted. And although he girl looked fit, she didn't have the same physique as kunoichi her age.

Unless she was a fangirl.

Kakashi brushed off that horrendous thought and examined the girls face closely. A dash of freckles across a nice nose, tanned skin, slightly blond-streaked, brown hair that, _was that red he saw in it?_ Her cheekbones, jaw or lips weren't prominent in any way. She just looked like a harmless civilian that had fallen asleep. At least until she suddenly bolted upright like she had been electrified.

His one eye was met with slightly dead looking green eyes that frankly, actually creeped him out. She then spoke in the coldest, most wrong voice he had ever heard. "Souls are repaid, balance is fulfilled."

The dead whispering sent shivers down Kakashi's spine and he only just caught the girl as her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and she passed out.

Kakashi sighed slightly, he was too old for this shit. He knew he should take the girl to a hospital, but he was tired! Even after a few weeks rest, he could still feel the pull on Obito's sharingan. Shrugging slightly he picked the girl up in a bridal carry and began to walk the last bit to his apartment, he would do something in the morning.

After he'd slept.

* * *

**Okay that was the first chapter of mimic. This is kind of like a promo so I want you guys to tell me if it is good enough to continue with.**

**Seriously there won't be any more OC's or OOCness, either than making Kakashi a little more sarcastic and SASSY. Why did Kishimoto make such an amazing person so calm and forgiving around little shits like team seven. Kami knows I would've become even more sarcastic and sardonic if I was around them as much as Kakashi is!**

**Anyway hope you liked it and please give me some feed back, flamers are more than welcome!**

**SunMoon Kunoichi out bitches!**


	2. Enter: Ninja-copies

**Okay I'm deciding that I'm going to write Mimic on Tuesday, Wednesday and Kunoichi Say What on the weekends. But when I finally finish surf season I'll have heaps of time, YAY! So another month or two and I am free!**

**Prepare yourselves, Alice is here!**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Don't own Naruto and all that magic_

**Warning: **_HAHAHA I'm a bad person for cussing. Also snarky Kakashi. You know you all want it._

* * *

Kakashi blinked tiredly as he snapped awake straight away. He yawned as he dragged himself out of the small futon he owned and turned to the kitchen. He walked over and got a glass of water before slumping down at his small dinner table, the only furniture he held either than some appliances, a futon and a comfy chair that only he used. Sipping at the water he stared blearily out of the window of his small apartment on the third floor. The dawn was especially bright today, but Kakashi didn't feel like admiring it, he was still far too tired to admire anything. In fact, he felt like destroying a lot of things, but as the Nara's said, troublesome.

He yawned again and cracked his back as he stood up. Padding towards his small closet he crammed a ration bar in his mouth, real food could come later. Pulling out some new clothes he entered the shower and cleansed himself thoroughly.

Pulling his mask over his face, Kakashi headed for his door, hoping to get in a few hours of stone-gazing before turning up late for his team's training.

Honestly he didn't want to go to training, but Naruto pulled the puppy eyes and annoyed him till he said yes.

Sighing he went for the door, only to stub his toe against something. Cursing softly he glanced at whatever he kicked, only to see the body of the girl he had found last night.

Rubbing his neck he chuckled nervously, he had left the girl on the floor by accident all night. She looked the same as last night, excluding the creepy voice accident. Sighing again he hoisted the girl over his shoulder and continued his way to the memorial stone.

* * *

Naruto was vibrating with excitement.

The wave mission had been a sort of success. He was sad that Haku and Zabuza had died, but he had completed a C-rank mission! The old man better watch out, 'cos he was coming for that hat!

Whistling tunelessly he jumped down from the building near the edge of town. Crossing a clearing he easily leapt into the trees and tree hopped to the training ground where he was going to meet with his team.

He surprisingly was usually first, alongside the Teme or sometimes Sakura, though usually she was spending time on her hair.

Flipping off the tree he nearly screamed at the sight of his sensei standing there, ON TIME!

"SENSEI!" He screamed, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?" Squinting at Kakashi he suddenly exclaimed, "YOU'RE AN IMPOSTER, THAT'S WHAT!" Nodded sagely Naruto crossed his arms and glared at the 'fake' copy nin.

He got a groan in answer, "honestly Naruto it's seven in the morning, can you not be quiet like any normal human being?" Naruto scowled at Kakashi, "Kaka-sensei, it's not cool to be so mean!" he turned away with a pout.

Kakashi really wanted to slam his head in the ground, but that wouldn't be good for his image. The image of a tardy, lazy, pervert must be upheld at all times!

"Kaka-sensei what the hell are you doing with an unconscious chick?!" Exclaimed Naruto as he pointed at the body of the brunette that was slumped on the ground behind Kakashi.

Said paedophile scratched his head embarrassed, "um, I found her?" He made it sound like an extremely awkward question, one that Naruto frowned disbelievingly at. "You don't just find chicks Kakashi-sensei! Even I know that!" Kakashi laughed and patted the blondes hair, "at least you know something."

Naruto growled and snapped at Kakashi's fingers, who then made a large gap between the two.

Their tirade was interrupted by a low groan from behind Kakashi. Turning around the copy nin saw that the 'chick' was finally waking up! Unfortunately the girl was content to just flail around and groan a bit, not making a move to actually wake up.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes slightly, something was definitely off about this situation, even civilians had chakra sources, this girl didn't! Normally they were fairly dormant and hard to sense when someone is asleep, and Kakashi wasn't the greatest sensor. He had dismissed it and thought nothing of it, but this was serious! This girl was seriously chakra deprived if he couldn't sense her chakra as she awoke. When people didn't have enough chakra they were in danger of dying, Kakashi knew that this girl needed a chakra transfusion straight away. The hospital was over the other side of the village though, he knew she wouldn't last the time it took him to get over there, even using shushin.

"Naruto!" He barked out and the blond snapped to attention as he heard his sensei was in a serious mood. "Come here," commanded Kakashi as he knelt down next to the semi-conscious girl. Hurrying over the blond knelt next to his sensei as Kakashi held out a glowing green hand.

He passed the hand over the girl, stopping near the heart and stomach mainly. "Kakashi-sensei what are you doing?" Asked the confused blond, chakra was blue, not green.

"It's medical chakra," clipped out Kakashi, "I know a few but I need your chakra, not that mouth of yours."

Merely nodding Naruto held out his hands, Kakashi placed them on top of his after he lifted the shirt of the girl and shifted her white bra slightly.

Ignoring the blush that threatened to creep up his face, Naruto slowly began to pour chakra into his hands. The hands were easiest to charge with chakra, and after tree walking, Naruto felt a bit more confident that he wasn't going to blow the girls face off. Like he had done with that poor tree he had trained on.

Kakashi meanwhile, was struggling to direct the massive influx of chakra that was coming from Naruto, safely into where her chakra core was, just above the navel.

Frowning when he could feel no pulse of chakra that signified that chakra was filling up her core, he asked Naruto to gently increase the chakra input.

Of course a little chakra for normal people equalled regular genin reserves for Naruto.

Cursing the blond and his ungodly reserves, Kakashi continued to direct the flow of chakra into the girl, gradually spreading it out to her whole body.

When he still felt no reaction, Kakashi grew worried, and that feeling in his gut never meant anything good.

Gasping slightly as he felt his reserves reach their current halfway, around a quarter of his normal reserves, Kakashi knew something was definitely wrong.

Cursing again he quickly flicked up his headband and analysed the girl with Obito's sharingan. Eyes widening in horror he instantly cut off his supply of chakra, only to realise Naruto's chakra was unconsciously trying to make up for the loss of chakra, by shoving more in.

Groaning in pain, Kakashi struggled to channel the chakra safely, "Naruto stop!" The blond had his eyes and ears closed as he continued to pour in the chakra. Obito's sharingan saw that the blond was halfway full of chakra, adding to Kakashi's quarter reserves, this girl had jounin reserves easily.

Shoving the blond away Kakashi broke the flow of chakra, and shielded him as the leftover chakra in the air dispersed with a bang.

Warily peeking around and deciding there was no threat, Kakashi let the blond up. Who then gasped for air dramatically, "Kakashi-sensei you fat ass!" Cried Naruto, "you could've squished me to death!"

"Maybe I'll keep that in mind next time you get on my nerves," eye smiled Kakashi innocently. Naruto scowled at him before perking up, "ne, ne! Where's the chick!"

Both ninja turned to where the girl was lying, only to find her curled up in a ball, contently asleep.

"Well I guess she's okay," remarked Kakashi as the two made their way over to the girl and sat down.

"Ne Kakashi-sensei why were you so early?" Asked Naruto excitedly, he had never seen his sensei earlier than two hours late for training.

"That's my secret my cute little genin," smiled Kakashi mysteriously, "and it looks like another of my little kiddies is here!"

"I am not a child Kakashi, do not refer me to as one," drawled a bored voice as a blue and white garbed kid walked towards them. Sasuke had his hands deep in his short pockets and a bored look plastered on his face as he stood in front of his teammate and sensei.

"You're here early Kakashi, that's a first," Sasuke stared at his sensei questionably. "I do not understand why it is so hard for you to call me sensei," sighed Kakashi as he stood up again and fished an orange book out of his pocket.

"Well you people are boring and I want to see what kind of naughty, naughty things Raiya can do to Tsundere!" He giggled lightly as he flicked the book open and went to lean against the tree.

"Kaka-sensei can be so gross and perverted sometimes," commented Naruto with a wrinkle of his nose. "Hn," was all he got in reply. His reply to that reply was a scowl with a fingered salute.

Sasuke scowled back and flicked the blond in the head, "Dobe."

Naruto snarled and jumped up, only to trip over something. Sasuke smirked in amusement, "can't see through that orange glare Dobe?"

"Shut up!" Barked an embarrassed Naruto as he stood up and dusted himself off. Looking back he groaned, "I totally tripped over the chick!"

Curious the Uchiha peered around his teammate, to see a brunette passed out on the ground. She was wearing a white t-shirt with a blinding array of colours that seemed to make up extremely strange characters. Strange, but bright lettering were printed across it. The t-shirt seemed to match the fluorescent orange shorts and green lace up shoes she was sporting. She was almost matching Naruto in her brightness.

Her hair splayed out and the Uchiha stared at the brown hair that was mixed with slight blond streaks, and _was that red he saw? _It looked rather long, as long as his female teammates hair. Her soft face with freckles and strong-for-a-civilian-but-weak-for-a-ninja physique obviously meant she was a civilian.

"Tch, why did you trip over a passed out civilian Dobe?" Asked Sasuke in a bored voice. Naruto shrugged for an answer and began to open his mouth when they heard a low groan, and a strange word.

* * *

**Alice P.O.V. (Finally!)**

My mouth felt dry like sawdust had been shoved down my throat. My brain hurt and it felt like someone was sitting on my chest. Groaning slightly I raised a hand to my head, "fuck," I swore quietly.

Blearily gazing around I noticed something, this wasn't my room! Where were the patchwork sheets and the bland walls that I-wish-I could-paint-but-I-was-still-stuck-in-a-rental!

Instead there were trees, a clearing, and two deceivingly familiar boys who were staring at me.

Smiling weakly I waved at the Naruto and Sasuke look-a-likes that were staring at me. "Sorry for asking," I spoke as clearly as I could with my accent, "but where am I?"

They looked at each other before looking back at me, _"nani ni?"_

Oh hell no! I was lost and two _foreign _cosplayers were the only people I could see that could help me!

"No English?" I asked desperately as they shook their heads and babbled more.

Where were the two and a half years of Japanese Alice?!

Standing up I bowed to them, "Hajimemashite. Watashi no namae wa Arisu desu. Doko ni arimasu ka."

Okay so the last part was a wild stab at where was I, but I had to try!

"_Doko ni arimasu ka?" _Said the Naruto-copy, he sounded confused, which wasn't good for me.

"Ano," I began, "doko?" I tried weakly and the blond nodded, "Konohagakure!" He chirruped wildly as the Sasuke-copy gave him a dirty look.

Sasuke-copy started yelling at Naruto-copy too fast for me to pick up anything, although I did hear baka a few times. Waiting for the two to finish I sat there quietly, humming to myself absently.

* * *

**Sasuke P.O.V. **

"You idiot dobe!" I fumed as the idiot had decency to look abashed, "you don't just tell anyone that they're in our village. What if she's a spy!"

Naruto scuffed the ground sulkily, he went to reply but Kakashi suddenly cut in. "She's not a spy," he remarked as he ambled over, "I've checked her over."

"Kakashi you pervert!" Screamed Naruto as he pointed at the surprised girl, _Arisu_, I reminded myself. "Feeling up a girl like that!" Continued the Dobe as he gestured at Alice with his arms.

Said girl blinked before bursting out in laugher, "ero-baka, ero-baka!" She sung out childishly before returning to chuckling. Definitely not a normal girl.

Kakashi looked fairly miffed at this, squatting down he raised his hand in greeting. Eye smiling he spoke, "yo I'm Kakashi." He continued to smile at the girl, "and you're a little shit."

Choking slightly I gaped at the man, why the hell would you just randomly say that to someone?! Naruto obviously agreed by the way he was yelling, "Kakashi-sensei that's not nice at all!"

The man shrugged in reply, "it's not like she can understand, and she's obviously foreign going by her accent and her meagre grasp of this language."

Scrutinising the girl I had to agree. She was currently sitting down with her face scrunched up in what seemed concentration. She stared up at an amused Kakashi, "yo I'm Kakashi." She spoke in Kakashi's voice perfectly, "and you're a little shit."

I could feel my mouth drop open a bit, she had spoken in our language, in Kakashi's voice! It had sounded like Kakashi was throwing his voice and she was moving her mouth. Glancing at sensei I saw he had a pensive look on his face as he stared at the smug girl.

Arisu was definitely looking pleased with herself and she flashed us a tooth-filled grin.

Kakashi turned to Naruto and I, "come on guys, we're heading to Hokage's office."

"Eh?" Asked Naruto, "why are we going to the old man's room?" Kakashi ignored him in favour of crouching down in front of Arisu. "On?" She asked, when she got a nod in response she squealed and leapt up onto Kakashi's back. Wrapping his arms around her legs, he hoisted the girl up more securely before turning back to us. "We'll use the roofs to get there, think of it as training," he added with a smile.

Arisu was peeking around the jounin's gravity-defying hair, she grinned at me before playing with Kakashi's silver hair.

Ignoring her I turned to Naruto with a smirk, "prepared to lose Dobe?" He grinned back in response, "not on your life Teme!"

We began to race each other to the trees, tree walking when we got to the trunks. Tree hopping we made our way towards the roofs of Konoha, I was not going to lose!

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

Mouth open I gaped at the two boys that had run up the tree and began fucking jumping ten metre gaps like they were no problem!

"Well that does it, I'm insane," I mumbled to myself as I stroked Kakashi-clone's hair. It was insanely soft if you were wondering.

Kakashi-clone turned to me with the eye smile down pat, he babbled something that I couldn't really understand. I heard 'go' and 'Hokage' in there so I shrugged. "Ike!" I yelled out and kicked the Kakashi-clone in the ribs. I could tell he was irked but he began to run. And I mean run.

He sprinted up the side of the tree and began tree hopping at blinding speed. The trees seemed to blur slightly and I was tempted to put my hand out and touch it. You know when you're in the car with the window down and you just have an _urge_ to stick your hand out and touch something. Of course that generally results in hands being lost, but it always seems like a good idea.

Kakashi turned his head back slightly and I couldn't help but yell out, "eyes on the road!" Of course he couldn't understand me but there was sentimental value in there.

He said something slowly to me and I could pick up 'faster' and 'ok?' I grinned at this, I was an adrenaline junkie, this speed was as good as riding on a motorbike. Duh, I wanna go faster!

I nodded swiftly and squealed in happiness as he began to _really _sprint. The squeal was lost in the howl of wind and I laughed as I ducked into Kakashi's soft hair.

Yes I had realised that it was the real Kakashi. It was kind of hard when you were running at speeds equal to the speed of sound. He even had that eye smile, damn that classic eye smile.

I couldn't help but let one of my hands that were clasped around my neck wander. Not that way you dirty, dirty people! I brushed my hand along the bottom of his masked face and felt him jerk in surprise.

Making a shushing sound I continued to brush my hand around his jaw and marvelled at how real it felt. The mask wasn't rough but smooth as silk. Well I would want something that covered my face 24/7 to be nice and comfortable.

Blinking the tears away at the sudden sunlight that hit my face, I finally got my first glimpse of Konoha.

It was just a flash of a street with shops and people before we were up the side of a building and jumping rooftops.

Kakashi turned back to me again and mumbled something about 'high' and 'speed.' The only thing that would be faster than a ninja running like this, is a ninja using shushin.

"Shushin?" I asked hopefully and got a swift nod in return, I squealed again. Taking that as a yes, Kakashi initiated the technique. _Without any seals._

Imagine my surprise when everything warped and my breath was taken away. Just as quickly as it started, it ended.

Opening my eyes that had been shut, I peered around. We were standing in the front of a giant ass building. Well it was obviously big here as it towered over everything else. It was small compared to the buildings I had seen up at Sunshine Coast. **(Queensland, wet 'n' wild, etc for you geography retards)**

I slid of Kakashi's back and wobbled slightly, Kakashi asked if I was okay. I waved him off with a grin and an exclamation of again. I don't think he understood the word, but I could tell he understood the meaning.

He patted my head and stood up with a smile as he stared towards my right. Turning I saw not-Naruto-clone and not-Sasuke-clone gasping for breath as they sprinted towards us.

They didn't look up as they sprinted for their goal, eyes widening I tried to get out of the way, with no avail.

They slammed into me full speed and my eye sight was blocked by a swirl of orange, blue and a clashing of limbs. A shoulder ploughed straight into my...chest and I nearly cried from the pain. Someone's foot took mine out and with the combined force of the shoulder I went down. Hard.

I could feel a lot of weight land on my already sore chest, I couldn't stop the small whimper and the start of tears. Someone muffled the whimper by slamming across my face. My head cricked painfully and I retaliated with a bite to the persons arm. A yelp from above meant I had hit my target.

I snarled softly, fuck this! I could feel the old anger come spiking back and I roared as I thrashed around. I bit, scratched, punched and kicked whatever body part stood on my wrath. More than once I slashed my own body in my frenzy.

Finally Kakashi intervened and I felt the weights dragged off me. I gasped for air and tried my hardest not to cry at the pain I could feel on my chest and face mainly.

Someone put an arm behind my back and helped me up. I grinned weakly at Kakashi as he supported me while I stood upright. I merely glanced at the two sulky boys before Kakashi distracted me. _"Daijobu desu ka." _

Not that, anything but that!

It was too late as I felt the tears well up at that question, anyone who knew me fucking _knew_ not to ask me if I was okay! It just took me a moment to grit my teeth and push the pain aside. That all fell to shit as soon as anyone asked me that question.

I could see Kakashi's panicked look as the tears began to fall steadily.

"NOO I'M NOT FUCKING OKAY! I'M STUCK IN KAMI KNOWS WHERE, BUT OH WAIT I DO KNOW! I'M IN A PLACE THAT IS FUCKING FICTIONALLY AND HE!" I pointed at the surprised Sasuke, "JUST VIOLATED ME BY PRETTY MUCH BADLY GROPING MY BOOBS!" I grabbed my chest and gestured towards Sasuke before moaning, "I'm done. I am 100 percent done!"

I fell back into a star pose on the ground, "what is life?" I asked jokingly, I used to always do that to annoy my friends, back home.

My lip quivered slightly as I realised a death god had sent me here, you don't just find a death god to send you home again!

An anxious face appeared in my peripheral vision, _"daijobu desu ka?" _Asked Naruto, I punched him in the face and got up. "A lot better now," I sighed, then laughed at the melodramatic blond that was rolling on the floor.

Laughing still I helped him up before tilting it upwards. There was a scuff mark on his left cheek where my fist had met his face, impulsively I gave a dramatic kiss to his cheek. "Mwuah," I said and patted his face, "all better!"

I rubbed his face stupefied before I turned to Sasuke. "Mwuah?" I asked innocently as I gestured towards him, he scowled and turned his head.

I stuck my tongue out at him before turning to an amused Kakashi, "ike?" I gestured at the stairs that led up the side of the Hokage tower.

He smiled before pushing me forward, I skipped up the stairs before turning to face the village. A labyrinth of streets and houses spread out below me. The buildings may not be as high as the buildings in Sydney, but they easily covered around half of its area.

I spun around and craned my neck around the tower and gasped at the sight I saw. The Hokage monument was even more amazing and beautiful then the manga or anime made it out to be! There was the First, Harashima. The Second, his brother Tobirama. The Third, Sarutobi. The Fourth, Minato, Naruto's father. And the Fif-There was no Fifth. No Tsunade staring down at all.

I turned back to see the three males of Team Seven staring at me, I should've realised from the way that Naruto and Sasuke were dressed. Naruto in his orange and blue jumpsuit, and Sasuke still in his blue shirt with white shorts. That also meant that I was here before the final round of the Chunin Exams!

I grinned at them before ushering them ahead. I stared at Sasuke's hair as he walked in front. It was bobbing up and down, like the duck's butt was bobbing on a pond. I stifled a laugh at that, but obviously Sasuke heard me. He turned back with a glare and I couldn't but laugh as the duck's wings (bangs) flapped like they were irritated.

I pointed at his hair before making a realistic duck noise, "Ahiru," I managed to choke out before quaking again. His face grew red with anger, but I was saved by the door knock.

I smiled at him before standing next to Kakashi, where it was safe.

He looked quizzically at me, but I only quacked in answer. He shook his head but faced forwards as a 'come in' echoed from inside.

Opening the door Kakashi led in, closely followed by me, with a vibrating Naruto and a trailing Sasuke.

I gazed adoringly at the old man that sat at the desk before me. The Sandaime sat serenely watching us, with his pipe lit and dangling out of his mouth.

"Ojii-san!" Cried a happy Naruto as he waved frantically at the Hokage, Sasuke slapped the back of his head to quiet him down. At Naruto's indignant shout the Hokage chuckled, he began to speak to Kakashi in a slow, deep voice. It sounded just as grandfatherly as it did in Sub.

I saw him glance briefly at me, but he was absorbed in the conversation he was having with Kakashi. Naruto and Sasuke stood quietly on the other side of Kakashi, but I quickly grew bored and the long and confusing conversation the two were having.

Humming to myself I inwardly laughed at the tune I always hummed, Akeboshi was a good song to be humming now.

"Don't try to live so wise," I sung quietly, "don't try 'cos you're so right." My amazing skills were interrupted by a soft cough. Embarrassed slightly I looked up to see everyone in the room looking expectantly at me.

I shrugged at them, but was saved when the Hokage beckoned me. I walked around the desk and turned around at his command. A hand began to pull my shirt up at the back, but I just blinked. I was a bit more worried when the Hokage undid my bra clasps. I got a real kick when I saw Naruto go red and Sasuke a little pink.

Kakashi cuffed them on the head and made them turn around. Satisfied that they wouldn't peek, he turned back to face us. I glared at him and put two fingers to my eyes and then at him in the universal sign of I'm watching you. I spun my finger around, telling him to turn around. He gave me the puppy eye, but I only glared harder. He sighed sadly but turned around, reading the little orange book he always had.

Feeling my back vibrate I started as I remembered the Hokage was there, and laughing at me. Ducking my head I gestured for him to continue to...undress me?

I held my bra to my chest as the clasp at the back flopped down. I shivered slightly as a wet brush was pressed against my back. Realising he was using fuinjutsu I stayed as still as I could. He speedily wrote characters down my back and I marvelled at the fact this wasn't even a seal master!

The brush disappeared from my lower back and I heard a clap from behind me. With a whisper of, _"__Akutibunisuru," _ the hand slammed against my back and I hissed at the sharp pain that crept up my spine.

The pain hit my brain and intensified ten times, I did something I had only done once before.

I fainted.

* * *

**Kakashi P.O.V.**

I turned as I felt Arisu's chakra plummet into unconsciousness. The girl fell onto the desk and I quickly did up her bra straps before anyone could see anything indecent.

I glanced up to see the Sandaime looking a little worried. "What's wrong?" I blurted out as the boys hustled over.

The Sandaime frowned, "the translating seal was only meant to cause short pain and that wouldn't be enough to make a girl faint. Especially since you say she took pain fairly well."

I stared at the girl currently passed out on the Hokage desk. She suddenly twitched and stirred. I watched as she slowly stood up, that was a short spell of unconsciousness.

Dead green eyes stared at me, but this time I could see a glow of yellow behind them. My heart began to accelerate at the sight of those eyes. Just as I expected, a hissing and cold voice emitted from her mouth.

"Shingami wishes to know who has tried to alter his chosen."

* * *

**Done and dusted.**

**That's pretty much a big leap from barely 2,000 words to like 5,000. Well done me.**

**They say Arisu 'cos that's how she introduced herself like that, trying to be Japanese and all that jazz. **

**The chakra problem will come later, along with Shingami fucking with her brain and the translating seal.**

**Okay any questions about this story or anything I've fucked up, just tell me.**

**SunMoon Kunoichi out haha!**


	3. Introduction: Team Seven gathered

**Disclaimer: **_Don't own. Don't own. Don't own_

**Warning: **_Alice and her mouth, also some mass confusion. Sakura when she's pissed._

* * *

**Kakashi P.O.V. **

Staring into those dead green eyes with the creepy yellow glow. I could safely safe I was just a tad bit freaked out.

I heard Naruto yelp behind me as Alice's? Gaze drifted over him. Sasuke was also extremely tense behind me, I touched his arm briefly and felt him relax a bit.

"Shingami's chosen?" Inquired Hokage-sama from behind the girl. He was still seated, but staring intently at the girl in front of him. Alice turned at that, she did so with an unnatural grace she hadn't seemed to possess before. She seemed to cock her head at him before she spoke again, "still upon the mantle Hiruzen?"

For his credit, Hokage-sama didn't flinch at all. "You seem to know my name. Are you Shingami or Arisu? Or maybe just a fraud."

Arisu's back was to us and I couldn't make out the facial expression she was making. The whole girl's posture was rigid, but seemed more like a coiled form. She reminded me of a snake, a creature you didn't poke with a ten metre pole.

"Alice is my chosen," she-it stated.

"Alice is her name? What do you mean by your chosen though?" I asked, it turned back to face me. I moved in front of Sasuke and Naruto, I didn't know how dangerous it was.

"She is my chosen. She will fulfil her duties." Again the cold voice seemed to talk with no emotion, like it didn't care about this conversation.

"THAT'S NOT EXACTLY HELPFUL 'TEBAYO!"

If this wasn't a serious situation, I would've palmed my forehead in absolute shame.

"Naruto stop," I spoke to the irate blond even as I kept my eyes on it. **"Alice"** was still looking almost bored, but it was more of a dead look than bored out of my mind.

"What consequences and conditions come with...you?" Asked Hokage-sama, he was picturesquely calm looking, like he was gazing over a tranquil scene. He didn't let any emotion touch his face as **"Alice"** looked at him once more.

"I was last in ethereal form twelve years ago." The first spark of life seemed to come into **"Alice's"** eyes, "I was summoned to devour the soul of the man you called the Yondaime, as well as half of the soul of the great demon. Kyuubi no Yoko resides inside thi-"

"I'm going to have to ask you to stop there," commanded Hokage-sama, "that is quite enough! We know this situation."

I relaxed slightly at this, I was prepared to take Sasuke outside. This was an S-class secret that only Naruto and Hokage-sama could give out freely. I don't know how a simple girl could know such things, unless this truly is the Shingami? I snapped back to attention when **"Alice"** spoke again.

"An S-class secret is it not?" **"Alice's"** head seemed to tilt slightly, "the fact that Kyuubi is still al-"

"ENOUGH!" Roared Hokage-sama, killing intent exploded out from him, I shuddered slightly as the immensely powerful feeling washed over me. I heard and felt Sasuke drop to the ground next to me, shivering. I managed to tilt my head to see Sasuke in the fetal position and Naruto...Naruto was looking scared and...awed? Of course, this was the man he worshipped. A Hokage. I studied the blonds face even as the killing intent continued. He was shaking and looked like he was going to collapse, but he was prevailing. I managed a small smile at that.

I turned my attention to **"Alice."** And felt my mouth drop slightly.

It looked completely unfazed, almost like she was waiting out a child's temper tantrum, It merely stared at Hokage-sama as he glared at her.

"Hiruzen," the amount of raw power in that voice stilled everyone, "enough of these childish games."

And with that, the KI stopped.

Sasuke gasped for breath and shakily stood up. He glared at It, but It merely raised an eyebrow. "Such interesting things humans," **"Alice"** spoke softly, "their souls are so bright. But can be crushed so easily." It seemed to be glazed over in thought, "this human's soul is the brightest I have seen in millennia, treat her well and do not question her life."

Suddenly the glow disappeared from its eyes and **"Alice"** passed out on the desk.

Again.

"Well that was interesting," I broke the silence with a small smile, "shall we go train?"

"WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED?!" Naruto screamed unhelpfully, he leapt around in frustrated circles. That was, until Sasuke smashed him over the head.

"Quiet Dobe," he panted out, still shaky from the KI, "you're too loud."

"Shut up Teme! I saw you drop down on your knees there!" He leaned in slightly, "_bibi neko,_"

Sasuke snarled at him and punched him in the face, I ignored the two in favour of talking to Hokage-sama.

"Well what shall I do with this...situation Hokage-sama?" I stared at the rather frail looking girl that was slumped over Hokage-samas' paperwork. "Kakashi I believe you can just treat this as a mission," he bit into his pipe and slowly lit it. Puffing away at the pipe he glanced at me, "the translation seal will take a moment to settle down. Days at the most, but beware the fact Alice here may lapse into her homeland language."

"If I may ask Hokage-sama," I said suddenly, "where does this translation come from? I had never seen sensei use this seal before." He chuckled at me, "I'm twice as old as Minato was. I have seen several interesting things, let's just say this isn't the first time." He chuckled again like it was a private joke before waving me away. "Those boys need some exercise, so take them down to the training ground along with your new charge."

I bowed and turned to grab the grappling boys, I knew Hokage-sama had just given us a sweetened order in form of a request. We had wasted a fair bit of his precious time, it was definitely time to go.

I slung Naruto over my right shoulder before picking up the rather floppy Alice. I chucked her lightly at Sasuke and smiled at his startled response of fumbling her and giving a small yelp.

Without a warning I put my free hand on his shoulder and performed a seal-less shushin.

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Upon arriving at the training ground, Sasuke shrugged Kakashi off with a scowl and slouched to the side, not realising he was still holding a comatose girl.

Kakashi dropped the woozy Naruto off his shoulder and fished out his orange book from his pocket. "Come on guys, it's time for training!"

That seemed to rejuvenate Naruto instantly, "Are we really going to train Kaka-sensei?!"

Kakashi gave a small laugh, "no Naruto, we're going to spend our day falling off this bridge." He gestured towards the red bridge that rested next to the training grounds.

Naruto merely scowled at him and flipped his head to pout, that was, until someone grabbed him in a headlock.

"NARUTO YOU BAKA!" Shrieked out Sakura as she held the choking blond in a headlock worthy of Tsunade. She held the blue head under her armpit and continued to clench and relax her muscles, while shaking him constantly.

"S-s-sakura-chan!" He choked out as he began to go purple from lack of oxygen.

"WHERE THE HECK WERE YOU GUYS! I WAS SITTING HERE ALL ALONE, WAITING FOR YOU RETARDS!" She continued to strangle the blond, who was changing through various interesting shades.

"Sakura don't you think he's had enough?" Asked Kakashi nonchalantly as he continued to read his book. Sakura's head turned around in a jerky manner, "enough sensei?" She asked in a sickly sweet tone, said sensei could sense the danger levels and wisely left his only blond student to die.

"Sakura enough."

The pinkette instantly dropped the blond and turned towards her crush, only to be crushed at what she saw.

"WHO THE HECK IS THAT?!" She pointed at the brunette lying in her Sasuke-kun's arms!

Sasuke glanced down and instantly recoiled at the sight of Alice still in his arms. He dropped her and stepped back, he discreetly wiped his hands on his pants.

Of course Kakashi saw.

'Look at my cute, awkward, anti-social genin,' laughed Kakashi inwardly. 'I'm sure we're going to have an interesting talk about the Kunai and the Shuriken.'

Alice hit the ground with an awkward slump, having been taller than Sasuke, she had her legs practically on the ground already. Unfortunately for her, her head smashed into the ground, face first. Luckily for her, she had finally woken up.

"OH FUCKING HELL!" She howled and grabbed her face, "WHAT THE FUCK? SERIOUSLY THAT REALLY, REALLY HURT LIKE A BITCH!" She continued to roll on the floor as she clutched her face, particularly her nose.

'I don't think the translation seal should be working at this moment,' deadpanned Kakashi.

Alice slowly rolled to her feet before glaring at Sasuke, "dude do you know how fragile this nose is? One more bad knock to it and it's definitely fucked! It won't set right either after I finally break it, so watch it you little shi-"

"Don't tell me what to do," sneered Sasuke **up **at the annoying girl in front of him. He didn't want to admit it, but the girl was slightly taller than him. And it pissed him off.

"Ke, shorty," Alice flicked his nose with a small leer, "whatcha gonna do huh?" Sasuke snarled slightly, "you're not, much taller than me _Yari koi._"

"Softy," she laughed, like I haven't been called that before. And," she grinned at him, "my mum always complains I slouch." She suddenly straightened up and now stood a full head taller than Sasuke easily. "Little boy," she laughed at him before turning towards Kakashi, "yo ero-baka! How come I can speak your language now?!"

Kakashi sighed softly and mumbled about ungrateful brats but complied, "Hokage-sama painted a seal onto you to translate your language into ours and ours into yours."

"So I have google translate in my brain?" She grinned even wider, "awesome!"

"What's googol translate?" Asked a confused Naruto, but Alice just waved him off, "nothing you guys would understand."

"Ummmm sorry, but who are you?" Sakura asked the strange new person uncertainly, she didn't know who this person was, but she had a foul mouth on her. Said girl blinked at her, "wow. Pink hair."

Sakura dipped her head shyly, the kids used to make fun of her unique hair when she was younger, along with her humongous forehead.

"That is so pretty!" Chirped the suddenly closer girl, Sakura started when the girl began to slide her fingers through her hair. "I wish my hair was like this, but mum won't let me dye it!"

Smiling at the weirdly shy Sakura, Alice found she was rather cute and a lot nicer than she expected from the show. Jade eyes blinked up at her, "but you have nice hair as well," spoke Sakura softly.

"Bah it's boring," waved Alice, "I want awesome colours in it like yours!"

Sakura had to disagree there. The girls hair was as long as hers and strangely spiky looking. A rather ruffled looking attempt at a side fringe flopped over her left eye and the other side was tangled in with her hair. The hair was a deep brown colour with odd intervals of blond streaks and, red? What was most interesting about the girl, was her face. Sakura had never seen freckles on someone before, and the light dashing across the girl's nose contrasted well with her bronzed skin. Her eyes were rather lidded looking, a lot like Shikamaru's, but they slanted upwards at the corners. They were a bright green colour, not a soft like hers, but an intense burning emerald green.

"I'm Clostar, Alice Clostar," the girl said brightly with a quick nod of her head. "I've always wanted to say that," she bubbled excitedly.

"What?" said Sasuke, "introduce yourself? Weirdo much." Alice shifted towards him and glared, "har-de-fucking-har ice cube. Spend all night thinking that up genius?"

Before the situation could get out of hand, Kakashi stepped in. "Now, now children, let's not get carried away." Sasuke turned his glare upon him, "I'm not a child Kakashi, and I'm twelve."

"Woah stand back," exclaimed Alice as she raised her hands, "we've got a badass here." She snickered at the pissed off expression Sasuke seemed to now be permanently wearing.

"Teme is always trying to act cool," complained Naruto, "he's not even that amazing!"

"Naruto!" Screamed Sakura, "Sasuke-kun is an Uchiha and was the rookie of our year! He's the strongest genin in the village!"

"Whoop-de-do," drawled Alice, "so he was top of your year." She shrugged, "not like he's the best out of the previous years. I mean, have you even seen any of the other ninjas your age?"

Sakura had no answer for that. Luckily Sasuke did.

"I have the sharingan," and he activated the dojutsu with a smug look on his face. Alice closed in on him and peered into his blood-red eyes, way too far in Sasuke's comfort zone. She stared into his eyes for a moment, until her hands suddenly flashed.

And she did a duel finger pokes to his eyes.

"AARRGGHH!" Sasuke yelled as he dropped to the ground in pain. He quickly deactivated his sharingan to stop the chakra from irritating his eyes. He didn't hear the worried yell of Sasuke-kun from Sakura, he only heard the hysterical laughter coming from Alice.

With a roar he leapt up and tackled Alice into the ground. He struggled with her for a while, but imagine his surprise when he was pinned down and straddled by his opponent. She grinned down at him, "you ninja pride yourselves so much on your fancy taijutsu! You have never really experienced wrestling matches have you? My older brother and I always wrestle, and I always win!"

Sasuke glared up at her with as much hatred as he could muster, this girl...Kami she made him so angry! He hadn't felt this ticked off in a while.

"Awww is baby Uchiha pissy," Alice simpered, "too bad. Man up girly."

Sasuke continued to glare at her, "I think I liked you better when I couldn't understand what you were saying. Kami you're a bitch."

She just laughed again, "damn straight I'm a bitch!" Surprisingly she began to speak in Sasuke's voice, "I like you, I understand you. Kami I'm your bitch."

Sasuke spluttered, "I didn't say that!"

Hearing a strangled sound, the duo looked up to see Naruto on the ground laughing. He pointed his finger at them, "S-s-s-sasuke-teme yo-o-ur face!" He continued to laugh even as Alice rolled off from Sasuke and walked over to him.

"Cut it out," she slapped him upside the head. He let out a short cry and cradled his head, "what the hell?!" She simply put out her arm, he smiled and grabbed it as she pulled him up.

"Uzumaki Naruto dattebayo!" Naruto crossed his arms behind his head and grinned so big his eyes were slits.

"Clostar Alice dattebayo!" She replied in his exact voice.

"Woah how do you do that?" Cried Naruto, Alice rubbed her head nervously, "I can mimic a lot of things. The more distinct sounding, the easier it is for me to mimic. I've been able to do it since I was around eleven years old, so I've been doing it for nearly four years now."

"You're fifteen years old right?" Asked Sakura curiously. "you seem slightly older."

"Hmmmm fourteen soon fifteen," began Alice, "my friends said I look older than I am, but act younger than I am."

"Che, like a five year old," scoffed Sasuke from behind her. Without turning around she replied, "nobody fucking asked you dickwad."

"You shouldn't say that to Sasuke-kun," mumbled Sakura, why did Alice have such a foul mouth?

Alice merely looked at her, "dude this guy is a total tool. Don't tell me you like him, please?" Of course Alice knew Haruno Sakura didn't like Sasuke, she apparently _loved _him. Sakura blushed slightly, "a-ano...ahh.." Alice let out a melodramatic sigh, "girls and their crushes, woe be me."

"So..." began Naruto, "what you're saying is...you're not a chick?"

Alice snorted, "I might as well be a guy by the way I act, people say I'm a guy in a girl's body."

"And that doesn't bother you?" Asked Sakura incredulously, "nope!" Replied Alice cheerfully, "I reply with I wish."

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "you would too." Alice wheeled around, "and how would you know that short stuff? You don't even know me," she then gave a wicked grin, "buuuttttt~ You understand me," she sang in a Sasuke voice.

"That is so creepy," deadpanned Sasuke, "don't ever do that again."

"Buuutttt~ Buuuutttt~" Sang Alice as she danced around him. She continued to chant it even as Sasuke began to make handsigns.

'I should really stop this,' thought Kakashi, 'but it'll be fine.'

True to his word, Sasuke's giant ass fireball missed Alice, but unfortunately set her clothes on fire.

* * *

"Why am I doing this again?" Asked Sasuke as he watched clothes go flying everywhere. "Because your giant ass fireball burnt my favourite pair of shorts," came Alice's reply, "you're just lucky it didn't burn my precious Adventure Time t-shirt!"

"I'm not even going to ask what the hell that is," muttered Sasuke as he watched Alice fling away all clothing that she apparently deemed 'not awesome enough.'

"Where's the ninja section?" She asked suddenly, Sasuke pointed to the left of the shop they were in. The duo was currently in the civilian part of a duel ninja/civilian "department" store.

Alice stalked over to the ninja clothing section, but was stop by a hand on her shoulder. "You can't go in there," glared Sasuke, "it's for ninjas only. I certainly can't see your headband."

"Jeez Sasuke," complained Alice, "live a little!" She continues to brush past him to the ninja articles, "such a rebel!"

Sasuke pressed his fingers to his temples, this girl was the most frustrating brat he had ever met. Loud as Naruto, but with a mouth like a drunkard, she had the most bipolar attitude. Alice seemed all laidback and then BAM! She became a four year old with a sailor mouth.

"No, no, no, no," muttered Alice tonelessly as she flicked through the racks at a high speed. "Where's something black?"

"Going emo?" Smirked Sasuke, "no ice princess," replied Alice. "Unlike you, I'm not going home to slit my wrists and cry about how life is making me its bitch."

And with that, she turned and marched into the changing rooms.

When she finally came out, Sasuke had to say she looked very different. He didn't know if it was good or bad, but it was definitely different.

The fluoro orange shorts had been replaced with black, skin-tight pants that Sasuke knew many kunoichi wore. Unlike the others, they were shorts, not the three-quarter length ones they usually were. She wore the black ninja sandals, but they went up to her shins and were laced rather than strapped. She had a black top on, one that definitely was different. It was strapless and had rather pointed crests, before it dipped low. It was tight around the chest before flaring out into the hips, where it had a small cut at the navel. A leather belt was worn underneath and Sasuke could see she had smuggled two ninja pouches to clip onto her sides. Two black things on either of her arms at the elbow drew his attention. With a jolt her realised that they were her sleeves, just hanging down in there and were joined underneath her armpits. With her chest shown, Sasuke could see a small black cord necklace, it had a ying and yang talisman hanging off of it. To finish the look, Alice was tying her hair up into a really high, left ponytail. Her left fringe was out and looked like it had been fixed up, it jutted slightly up and to the side, brushing her eyes.

"Tada~" She gave a pose, Sasuke merely stared. He then turned away, "they won't let you buy that. You're not a ninja, you don't have a headband."

"That's nice," she hummed before grabbing his arm and dragging him to the counter. "Wha-what the heck!" Sasuke shook her strangely strong grip off him and crossed his arms coolly.

"Can I help you?" Asked the cashier sceptically, he looked Alice up and down, "you're not a ninja so you can't have those clothes." Alice suddenly changed, her whole posture went shy and very withdrawn. "I'm very sorry sir," she said in a polite voice, "Uchiha-san here had offered to buy me things. He is very kind to pity me, I don't blame him for that rogue katon technique, it wasn't his fault." Her eyes were very big and innocent looking, "Uchiha-san is so very kind. I mean, the elite Uchiha is taking pity on me. A civilian hoping to be a ninja!"

Sasuke could only stare at her incredulously, where the heck was the rude bitch he had just been arguing with?

The cashier glanced at Sasuke and his eyes widened almost comically, "Uchiha-san I didn't see you there!" He hurried into the back room and appeared back with a basic ninja kit, "for the girl you so pity." Alice bowed deeply and murmured a heartfelt thank you before turning to Sasuke, "I'm sorry you have to pay Uchiha-san."

Okay what? Sasuke was really confused now, he had to pay for what now? Wha?...

"Oh no Uchiha-san!" Exclaimed the cashier, "you don't have to pay for anything!" He flapped his hands at them, "it's on the house." He bowed deeply to them and Sasuke blankly copied Alice as she too bowed. She smiled softly at the cashier and then turned heel to make her escape.

Once they got outside, Sasuke finally snapped out of his daze. He spun around to the humming girl, "what the heck was that?" She blinked at him, "what do you mean what was that?" Sasuke spluttered slightly and waved his hands around, "what the heck was that soft and polite girl back there! That isn't you! You're a rude bitch!"

"Such a charmer," said Alice dryly, "I said I'm bipolar. It's never actually been proven, but I have habits and emotions that are suppressed until a certain point." She began to wind her way through the crowded streets as Sasuke followed.

"What do you mean by that?" Sasuke shuffled past a fat merchant to get back to Alice. Konoha's streets were always busy in midday.

"I mean that with my mimicking," Alice paused slightly, "I...I...It's hard to explain." She glanced at him with slightly troubled eyes, "the years of mimicking, they have, _affected _my mind. When I mimic habits of people it gets stuck," she tapped her head, "in here they are constantly repeated for weeks and even months. I use the saying or action until it's coded into me, then," she shrugged, "I forget."

"What does that have to do with being bipolar?" Asked a confused Sasuke, "well..." Alice thought for a moment, "I copy _people's _actions and therefore I copy the person themselves. The habits I forget pop up in different situations, back then, a habit popped up. I can't talk to adults that I don't know without being shy or polite." She gave him a sly grin, "though I did twist his little mind slightly with your social stature."

"So you used my name for your gain?" Sasuke deduced and scowled when she nodded. He then looked around, "where are we?" She stared blankly at him, "I thought you knew."

"What!" He cried, "I thought you knew where you were going!" Alice snorted at him, "why the fuck would you follow a foreigner?"

The previously serious mood with shattered and Alice followed Sasuke back to the main part of the streets. She swore she didn't know how they got to the casino part of the Red Light District, but she knew she wanted to try her luck there sometime.

* * *

"Itadakimasu!" Cried out Alice as she began to devour another bowl of absolute deliciousness.

"Ifhs gud isn thit?" Naruto sprayed bits of noodles and broth over Sasuke's twitching face. "Dammit Naruto where are your manners!" yelled Alice, she licked her hand and scrubbed the food off Sasuke's face.

The twitching increased.

"I love the ramen here!" Alice downed the broth of her second bowl of beef ramen. Naruto nodded vigorously, "ramen is the food of the gods!"

A chuckle was heard as a hand put more noodles into their bowls, "on the house. Since Naruto has finally managed to bring a new friend, and a pretty girl." Alice cupped her face and waved her hand, "stop it Teuchi-san you sly dog."

"That is so wrong," sighed Sasuke as he stared into his untouched bowl of vegetable ramen. Suddenly someone leaned **way **to far into his personal space, "you gonna eat that?" Asked Alice hopefully, Sasuke silently slid the bowl over and sighed again, how the hell did he get saddled with this crazy chick?

"More please Teuchi-san!"

Sasuke contemplated if someone could drown themselves in ramen broth.

* * *

"Did everyone enjoy their lunch break?" Asked Kakashi with an eye smile, he sneakily observed their facial expressions.

Naruto looked as happy as usual and decisively full.

Sakura was looking like she wanted to say something to her crush, but didn't exactly know what.

Sasuke looked like he was suffering through hell.

And the foreigner Alice was bouncing like she had seen a giant mound of candy.

Both Sakura and Sasuke were silent, but the resounding shout of joy from Alice and Naruto had shown their approval.

"Well I'm sorry to inform you guys that we have no training on," chirped Kakashi happily, "so before I go I should inform you guys that Alice needs to stay with one of you. She doesn't have anywhere to go and since Naruto lives in a too small apartment, Sakura has no spare bedroom, and I don't want to deal with brats, Sasuke It's joy time for you! Hope you had fun waiting suckers. Later." He then disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Team Seven's mouths dropped open in horror.

"Are," said Sakura.

"You," said Sasuke.

"Freaking," said Naruto.

"JOKING!" They screeched together.

"This is so like Kakashi-sensei!" Ranted Naruto, "I bet he's gone off somewhere to read those damn perverted books of his. Ero-sensei!"

Sasuke fumed silently but looked up when Sakura spoke, "Alice-san are you okay with you and Sasuke-kun...bunking together?" Sakura sent a glance to Sasuke, she didn't want this girl to be with Sasuke-kun. Alone. IN HIS HOUSE!

"_What are you saying?" _Asked Alice in a confused tone, _"what the fuck's happening?!"_

"Dammit," cursed Sasuke softly, "the translation seal must've stopped working. Of course she'd cause problems on the first day,' he glared at the confused teenager. When she saw him glaring, Alice gave him a fingered salute and stuck her tongue out, _"damn prick."_

"I couldn't understand that," said Naruto, "but I know she just insulted you." Sasuke nodded absently, he turned and began to walk away, "come."

Alice knew by his beckoning hand that Sasuke wanted her to follow him. So with a wave goodbye at the rest of Team Seven, she chased after the Uchiha.

* * *

She silently followed the Uchiha through the town, the sun was setting now and they were on the outskirts of town. The quietness and deserted feeling gave her the creeps, shivering slightly she inched closer to Sasuke. He flicked his gaze over to her, but ignored his shivers. Enjoying her suffering, because all day he had suffered because of her.

He had never had to go have ramen with Naruto before, he always left too early for him to say otherwise. He had never suffered through shopping, he already had clothes made for all his ages. They were hand crafted by the Uchiha civilian merchants before...

He had also never had someone come into his clan compound either than Uchihas.

Opening the slightly creaky gates, Sasuke quickly walked the deserted and bloodstained streets to his house. A sneaky look at Alice showed a solemn face and a slight dose of curiousness. Sasuke gritted his teeth, what did this damn foreign have to be solemn about! This was his clan! His pain! No one understands his burden!

He slid open the front door with more force than necessary, and pushed Alice in roughly when she wasn't fast enough for his liking. She didn't say anything though, and merely followed him as he led her through the house.

He walked into a cold living room, it had a single couch and a lamp. All personal items had long since been taken down by Sasuke. He pushed Alice down onto the dusty couch, "stay. Sleep," he ordered and got a mute nod in answer. The girl curled up in a ball and closed her eyes, Sasuke left her and stormed upstairs. He quickly got ready for bed and threw himself onto his bed, he sighed heavily before closing his eyes and going to sleep.

* * *

It was definitely late at night. Sasuke had woken up with a memory of _Him._ He padded through the concrete corridors and made his way to the kitchen.

After splashing water on his face, Sasuke drank some water to calm his nerves. After breathing for a few minutes he felt himself ready to go back to sleep.

He began to walk back to his room, but he stopped in the doorway of the dark living room. Letting his eyes adjust to the darkness, he scanned for Alice. Seeing a small bundle on the couch he quietly ghosted over.

She was tucked into a small ball and shivering uncontrollably. Sasuke was used to the cold of his home, but he did admit that the living room was one of the coldest parts of the house. It didn't help she was only wearing her extremely short clothes.

Sighing he went to the cupboard and pulled out a blanket, throwing it over the girl, he turned and went back upstairs to sleep.

* * *

**Bloody done!**

**Thank Kami that took forever! I stretched that over a fair few days and I'm so happy it's done. **

**Yes Alice will continue to swear that much, she's like a female Hidan in that sense, but whatever.**

**Kari Yoi means softhearted, meek, limp, etc, etc.**

**Any questions just ask!**

**Bye!**


	4. Act 1 Part 1: The Awakening

**Mimic chap 4**

**So uh, hi.**

**I'm here to deliver a chapter, as well as other stuff. I'm leaving for two weeks this weekend and I'll come back in the hols. I have a new laptop that is my own, you know what this means? TWO WEEKS WORTH OF WRITING 'COS I'LL BE BORED! Enjoy the temporary silence of me not being here, then wait for the mass of chapters, mwahahaha!**

**On another note. Several beautiful people reviewed this lame ass story, hugs and kisses for you guys! I've had people ask will Alice actually be a ninja? Have fun waiting suckers, mwahahaha!**

**On with the story!**

**Disclaimer:** _Wish I could, but I can't_

**Warning: **_Language, sassy Alice and strange Kakashi_

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

I came into consciousness with a tired yawn. I rubbed away the bleariness in my eyes and sat up with a groan.

I fucking hate mornings.

I stumbled out of my bed and went to go into the bathroom that was straight ahead…..Only to smack into a wall. I blinked again and turned around to go to the kitchen. Except there were no stairs to get there.

A bit more awake, I realised that this definitely wasn't my house.

"Where the fuck am I?" I muttered as I glanced around the creepy, still dark living room I was in. The couch I had slept on had a blanket lying on it, a black in the poor light. Creeping closer I noticed a stitching in the corner. A red and white table tennis paddle. Not wait, sorry, that was the Uchiha clan symbol. Which was a fan…..I just insulted the most prestigious clan's symbol. Oops.

I snorted as I remembered yesterday's events, good memories.

I shuffled into the open doorway and glanced back and forth along the equally dark hallway. The floorboards were cold on my feet as I crossed into what was obviously the kitchen. It was a brighter colour due to the white and the glimmer of the rising sun.

"Fucking almost-insomnia," I cursed lightly. Normally I got up a few minutes before my six fifty alarm in the morning, but I usually _woke up _at bloody dawn and before. Joy time for me, it was seemed like summer here and that usually meant earlier sunrises. I estimated it was about four thirty to five in the morning.

Yay.

I continued my self-depressed shuffle to Sasuke's cupboards, when I opened them I groaned. What the hell was some of this food? I just stared at the packets of food that had katakana and bloody kanji written all over them. I stared at the packets for a while before picking one up and sniffing it. Before sneezing at the strong smell of Jasmine coming from it, I stared at the packet and slowly deciphered the barely remembered katakana it held. Jasmine tea huh? I shrugged and tossed it onto the wooden panel counter, why you would have something so flammable in the kitchen, I did not know.

I continued my merry search for food and hit the jackpot when I found an extremely ancient and forgotten tub of instant udon. Nearly its due-by-date, but it seemed okay. I was just a bit sad it wasn't ramen and it didn't have BBQ pork.

I looked around before I found, surprisingly, an electric kettle. Well I had seen Naruto use it before in the episodes and Sasuke was an orphan, he probably couldn't cook too well for himself. I poured water in it from the sink and settled myself down with a barely used cup filled with the Jasmine leaves. I always wanted Jasmine tea or Green tea!

When I heard the kettle begin to whistle, because it just _had _to be old-fashioned, I took it off its power source and poured it into the tea. Opening the top of udon and throwing the flavouring packets in, I prepared to pour the water in when a hand stopped mine.

Shrieking slightly I threw my whole body back in a spastic flailing movement. The persons hand let go when the water splashed slightly on it. Of course without the support from the persons grip, I jerked back even more and flung the _boiling as fuck _water up at myself.

The water splattered against my arm and up on my right cheek, I hissed slightly and fumbled the kettle before deciding to drop that god awful bitch.

"Son of a gun," I cursed as I studied the red that was slowly coming out against my whole arm and I could feel it coming out on my face. I shook the arm to distract myself and began to hum slightly hysterically as I tried to distract myself.

"What the hell where you doing?!" Asked Sasuke angrily as he spun me to face him. He grabbed my arm none too gently and began to inspect it. "It's your fault for scaring me dickwad," I said grumpily, "who actually grabs someone's hand! One that is holding fucking boiling water!"

He scowled at me, "I didn't want the stink from that crap," he pointed at the innocent cup of Udon, "floating everywhere through my house!" I stuck out my bottom lip, "poor baby Uchiha is now a house wife? Wifey is scared of getting shim's beautiful house all dirty from the commoner filth?"

He flicked my ear, "if I'm the wife you're the husband since you keep screwing around and doing nothing!" He then looked thoughtful for a moment, "did you just call me a shim?"

"Yep," I chirped. "you're a she and a him at the same time!" He rolled his eyes, "aren't you in pain from being burnt by boiling water right now?" I whimpered, "I was keeping my mind of that duckass!"

I could feel the pain that was at the back of my mind come rushing straight to the foreground. It was practically screaming, 'Alice! Alice! You're in severe pain right now! Suffer bitch, suffer! Feel thy boiling water wrath!'

I admit that I'm a bit of a baby sometimes, but luckily I had been burnt several times at home and at work. I knew what to do. I bent my elbow up to my face and began licking it lightly, saliva was just as good as cold water and I always felt better when _I _was the one healing myself.

"Stop doing that!" Scolded Sasuke as he yanked my arm from my face, "yes mother," I said dully. He glared at me before poking strangely gently at the wound. "Don't put your disgusting germs all over it," he began to press his cold fingers against the wound. I relaxed slightly at the cold that radiated from his fingers, Sasuke's hands were nice and cold. "Your hands are as cold as your heart Icy," I joked as he continued to inspect the burn. He hummed slightly before dropping my hand and going over to the timber cupboards to rummage through them.

"If you're going to get painkillers don't bother," I called as I began to lick the burn again. I could feel the pain ebbing away slightly, I would be fine in about an hour, that's usually when the healing process really took hold. I laughed at my wimpiness, "this is nothing compared to what I got last year," I commented aloud. "I flipped a motorbike while it was in second gear. I skidded along the ground at around thirty kilometres per hour with the bike on top of me, I broke the clutch off while I was at it! I was a dumbass and didn't wear a jacket, I got the most insane grass burn up my left forearm! It took two months to heal to this scar." I was rambling at this point and waved my other forearm at the busy Sasuke to show him the nearly invisible scar there.

Sasuke didn't bother to answer my rambles as he got tablets out of a large wooden box with other medicines, what was with Uchiha's and their bloody wood? He advanced towards me with a very suspicious looking white tablet, I told him so as he tried to make me eat it. He scoffed that I was an idiot and continued to try and open my unyielding mouth, as if he could move my super powered jaw!

"I'm not eating it!" I said stubbornly as I turned my head away from the _obviously _suspicious tablet. He growled slightly, "you will take these damn tablets or kami help me…" I narrowed my eyes at him as I discreetly crept my hand towards the pocket in my ninja (oh yeah!) shorts. I played with the box before sliding it open slightly, "I will set you on fire if you don't stop," I declared. He scoffed again, "you and what katon jutsu?"

I smirked at him before flicking the match I held against the matchbox in my pocket, I brushed the tiny flame against Sasuke's really flammable pyjama shirt. Which by the way, was grey…boring little boy isn't he?  
He yelped and dropped the tablet before slamming his hands against the flame that was creeping up his sleeve. When he successfully put out the flame he turned back to me, "what the hell was that for you psycho bitch! Where did you get the matches from?!" I grinned knowingly before tapping the innocent looking box in my hands, "my friend's pyro habits have rubbed off on me. Kami bless that psychotic, pyro!"

I could see that Sasuke was looking a bit freaked out about my friend, but hey, he was totally awesome! He could make heaps of explosives and he showed me a video of the actually legal fireworks they had set off. It was beautiful. He was pretty cool, except for when he nearly blew his fingers off. Fail.

"What's your friend like?" Asked Sasuke curiously, I smirked at him, "what's with all the questions princess?" "What's with all the stupid names?" He shot back, "touché," I quirked my eyebrow at him, "but why would I tell you what my friends are like?" I walked calmly out the door sipping the tea I grabbed, "you're a ninja are you not?" I turned slightly back to glance at Sasuke, "killing unknown targets is what you're bred for no?"

I continued to sip my tea as I walked to the couch I had woke up in.

* * *

The tea I had was really good and normally I don't like tea all that much. I ignored the cloud of happiness next to me in favour of glancing around the streets we were walking through. Konoha was a very large village, what was equivalent to a village back home was some huts in the middle of nowhere in some random rainforest. Not bloody Los Angeles with its low rise buildings, but large acre coverage and dense population!

Several merchants were crying out their early morning wares as sleepy looking civilians began to make their way to work. Everyone seemed to walk here, not like they had a choice, there didn't seem to be any mode of transport except for the occasional horse-drawn cart. It was a nice change from the long walk to school from the train station that I did in the morning, with its disgustingly polluted streets and cars everywhere! I hated human beings sometimes.

Sasuke and I continued our silent (and slightly awkward) walk to Team Seven's training ground. Why we were leaving at six thirty in the morning, I did not know. I knew that Sasuke was a fucking moron though. I stifled a yawn as we crossed the boundary of trees that surrounded the grounds, honestly there was a path here! Why would we walk through the trees! Sasuke was definitely insane.

"Why are we here so early girlie?" I asked a still brooding Sasuke as he leaned against the tree I was now sitting under. I fiddled with the still dewy grass as I crossed my legs, waiting for Sasuke's answer, but it never came. I huffed, irritated before deciding to do my stretches. I usually did stretches for flexibility after I did some sort of training, but since it was morning and no training, I'd have to find something to do.

I stood up and began to shake my limbs to get the blood running, I slapped up my legs to warm them up as well. I did a few simple leg stretches before some arm stretches, I could feel Sasuke's curious gaze on me but I didn't turn around. I huffed out a breath before cracking my neck, I began to run around the outside of the grounds. I kept my usual long distance running pace and sang songs in my head so I could focus on something either than my burning legs and lungs.

'_Disappointment haunted all my dreams-_

_And then I saw her face, now I'm a believer! Not a trace, of doubt in my mind. I'm in love!_

_Ooohhhh_

_I'm a believer, I couldn't leave her if I tried.'_

I snorted slightly at my apparent song choice, smash mouth was awesome. Good old songs from my childhood!

I slowly began to finish my tenth lap after about fifteen minutes, at the last hundred meters, I sprinted. I was an awful sprinter unless my life and dignity depended on it, so I felt like a retard as I tried to pick up the pace on my tired limbs. I slid to a stop and instantly began to do breathing exercises to get my breath under control. Thank god for swimmer lungs, if I didn't do so much swimming, I would easily suck even harder at running than I did now.

"Damn mum and her awesome running skills," I grumbled as I walked briskly to the centre of the sort of oval. I stood in front of the three posts that I knew Team Seven first met at. I believe the posts were for practising punches and kicks on it, to strengthen the skin around the appendages or something.

Pshhh, like I'm gonna do that!

I hoisted myself onto the top of the middle log, I then flipped myself around and lay on my back across the middle one and the right one. I shifted myself back until the upper half of my body was perpendicular to the ground. I hooked m feet around the far left log and began to do sit ups. Normally I did special ones against my wardrobe at home (my room was tiny! Shut up!), but this would have to do. The distance to get to my feet was bigger than usual, the fact my legs were straight meant I could stretch the tendons at the back of my knee. The posterior cruciate ligament if I recalled from mum's nurse talk, it connected to the hamstrings which meant they could tighten and tear if not stretched well enough.

I did my rep of fifty before getting up and lying on my front, I pushed my arms up and began to do my rep of fifty push ups. I was panting and sweating by the time I finished them, I _gracefully _fell off the logs and lay there on my back. I stared up at the drifting clouds for a moment, I was already tired. Tch weak!

I grunted as I pushed myself up, I quickly did twenty jump ups, which consisted of jumping up, then instantly dropping into a push up and then jumping up again. I could only handle twenty if I didn't want to be tired for the training that was sure to come later on.

I finished the rep and let myself drop back down to the ground, sitting on my bum with my legs outstretched, I curled my hands around them as I leant forward. This was the start of my twenty to thirty minute stretching session, and normally it was a lot better if I had my music to listen to.

'_So now I'll ask, do you like that, do you like that?_

_NNNOOOOO!_

_Something's getting in the way.  
Something's just about to break.  
I will try to find my place in the diary of Jane.  
So tell me how it should be.'_

I bobbed my head along to the song inside my head, some good, hard core rock was what I really needed right now. I wish I had my iPod, but I never brought it into my bag for work. Damn! I had left my bag back at Sasuke's, oh well.

I slowly began to wind down my stretches before preparing for the acrobatic part. Normally I would only do splits, but I had plenty of room and soft grass to break my fall. I slowly began to drop down into the side splits, it hurt a lot, but I manages to get the entire way down again. I grinned and whooped, point for head bitch in charge!

I rolled out of the splits since I couldn't get _up _out of them yet. I did some more stretches on my arms and hands before standing up. I rolled my shoulders before tilting back, I leant back until I finally let myself drop into a bridge. I grunted as I landed but remained stable, I swung myself back and forth slightly until I popped up into a handstand. I held myself there for five seconds until I felt myself collapse, I rolled with it easily since I couldn't get out of a handstand any other way.

I jingled my arms slightly before going for a run up, I hoisted myself into a handstand before going straight into a bridge from it. I felt my arms groan, but they held well. Today was a good day for me! I rolled out of it again and panted slightly, I could feel my arms shake as I tried to get up. I wobbled as I pushed myself up, I stopped though when a hand was thrust into my face. I looked up at the stoic face of Sasuke, I grinned at him before letting myself be hoisted up. I hissed slightly when I felt the still healing arm twinge in pain, I looked up to see Sasuke staring at me superiorly. I hit him in the arm before looking him up and down.

"You look like a relatively good weight," I commented as I continued to study him. He shifted slightly, "where are you going with this weirdo?" I punched him again in the arm, "I just wanted to do some strength stuff and it can only be done with a partner!" He glared at me suspiciously, "where are you going with this?" I grinned at him, "you'll see!"

* * *

**Third person P.O.V.**

"C'mon Sakura-chan! One date after this training session!" Naruto yelled out to an already grumpy Sakura as they walked along the dirt road that led to their training grounds. "NO NARUTO YOU BAKA!" She shrieked as she ploughed a fist into his face, he made a funny yelp as the weirdly strong fist smashed into his face. He bounced along the road once or twice before lying with his head in the ground as he twitched. Sakura growled at his comatose form before stomping down the path, Naruto was recovered and instantly at her side in less than a second.

For her credit, Sakura simply ignored Naruto as they entered the training ground from the east side. They began to look for their brooding teammate as they walked towards the tree they normally sat under. Naruto was the first to spot him.

He began to snicker, "look at Sasuke-teme go!" Sakura instantly spun around at the mention of her crush, only to gasp in horror.

Sasuke was standing in the middle of the training grounds with his arms up, a little strange, but that could be overlooked. What Sakura couldn't overlook was that girl Alice doing a handstand on top of his upturned palms. They were both shaking with effort, but Sasuke actually looked….._pleased._

He had a smirk playing around his mouth as he looked up at the upside down girl's face, he had his mouth moving as he _talked. _Sakura definitely felt horrified, and pissed.

"Sasuke-kun!" she called out across the grass. Both Sasuke and Alice turned their heads to see who was yelling out to Sasuke, unfortunately that overbalanced them. Sakura winced and Naruto laughed as the two fell to the ground. Sasuke was lucky enough to only fall back, Alice was unlucky enough to smash her head into the ground. She seemed to do a headstand for a moment, until the rest of her body finally caught up. Her legs flew over and she did a face plant forward. Lucky for her, Alice's landing was softened, unlucky for him, Sasuke's gut got a duel kick to it.

Sakura could almost hear and feel the grunt of air that was pushed out through Sasuke's lips. She hurried over to her teammate to help him in any way she could. After pushing off the girl's legs, Sakura tried to help Sasuke get up. _By leaning over him and continuously asking if he was okay. _

"Fucking hell," groaned Alice as she sat up, she rubbed her head and glanced around for Sasuke. Seeing he was in the clutches of a rabid fangirl she shrugged, "he'll be fine!" She then looked around for the source of the hysterical and choked sounding laughter. Her eyes settled on the orange form of one Uzumaki Naruto as he rolled around the floor laughing, "brings the meaning of ROFL to life," grinned Alice as she stood up. She walked over and none too gently kicked the blond, "shut up shorty, I'll bet you've done heaps of fails like that!"

Naruto stopped laughing and glared at her slightly before puffing up his chest, "the great Uzumaki Naruto would never do something so stupid dattebayo!" Alice snickered before speaking in a goofy sounding version of Naruto, "I am the great Uzumaki Naruto and I like ramen dattebayo!" Naruto frowned at her, "hey! That was mean!" Alice laughed nervously, "yeah sorry 'bout that. I can be a real bitch sometimes!"

The two sat and stood in an awkward silence, suddenly Alice clapped her hand, "well this is awkward and every time there is an awkward silence a gay baby is born. By the way we're going, we could populate the planet with gay people!" Naruto stared at her suspiciously, "where's your proof?" Alice simply waved her hand dismissively, "how did you expect Sasuke was born?"

There absolute silence for a moment, "you think I'm gay?" Asked Sasuke incredulously as he blinked at the grinning brunette from where he was still in a sort-of-but-not-really-and-not-wanting-it-embrace. She simply shrugged and bounced over to Sakura and Sasuke, "up, up, up! Let's face the day and get started!" She began to hop from foot to foot in her excitement, Sasuke gladly popped that bubble. "You do realise that Kakashi will be another hour since he doesn't care about this training?"

Sakura agreed with her crush (not like there's any surprise), "Kakashi-sensei is always late!" Naruto decided to throw in his two cents worth by nodding vigorously in agreement with his teammates.

"Aawww it hurts to realise you guys don't trust me," drawled out a voice from the tress behind them. The three kids and one pretty-much-teenager (although not in behaviour), turned around to see Kakashi casually slung along the branches of one of the trees. He didn't have his usual book in his hand, instead they were fiddling with a small scroll in his hand.

"WOAH KAKA-SENSEI EARLY FOR TWO DAYS IN A ROW!" Screamed out Naruto as he waved at the lazy jounin. He eye smiled at Naruto before sliding down, "if you check the time," he said slyly, "you'll see I'm late by two minutes." Alice laughed at Naruto's annoyed expression, "new record ero-sensei!" Kakashi sighed, "you didn't forget that last night?" She merely shook her head.

"What are we doing today Kakashi-sensei?" chirped Sakura as she smiled sweetly at her sensei, too sweetly.

'**CHA YOU BETTER NOT FLICK US OFF AGAIN ERO-BAKA!'**

Sakura internally agreed with her inner, Kakashi-sensei would pay if he flicked them off again!

"Hmmm well you guys will be doing laps as I take Alice-chan here to see Hokage-sama again!" Said Kakashi cheerily as he walked towards Alice. "Eww it's now Alice-chan you sick little pervert!" Cried Alice as she struggled under Kakashi's grip, he had grabbed her shoulders so she couldn't get away!

"Dammit Kakashi train me!" Snarled Sasuke as he glared at the aloof jounin. He got a shrug in answer, "I've got to take Alice-chan here to see Hokage-sama!" Sasuke switched his glare to the brunette, "great ero-fucking-baka!" Cursed Alice, "now you've got emo boy mad at me!" She shifted to look at him quizzically "if you're such a great jounin, why don't you just use kage bushin?"

Honestly Kakashi could've slapped himself in stupidity, but that wasn't cool. So he made a quick ram seal, and grabbed Alice again before she could escape, as a copy of him appeared. He eye smiled at his students, "I'll see you all soon!" Alice gnawed at his hands, "let me go! I can feel that something bad is gonna happen! You better not fucking rape me! I swear to Jashin I will set you on fir-"

The rest was cut off as the duo disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Well that was interesting," muttered Naruto as they snapped out of the stupor caused by seeing their sensei kidnap a girl. The other two nodded in agreement before turning back to the Kakashi-clone…..only to see it holding a rather large whip. He cracked it at them, "run my mutts run!"

* * *

**Strange controversial Kakashi with his strange habits and his strange way of kidnapping young girls. Anyway this will be the last chapter in three weeks unless I can find wifi somewhere in the heart of hell. **

**Have fun chickadees!**


	5. Act 1 Part 2: Fire and Ice

**Here it is. **

**The start of the (hopefully) flood. **

**I have been waiting so long for this….so here we go!**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Naruto won't be mine! *cries*_

**Warning: **_Language and gangbang no jutsu (jokes-(or really?))_

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

"No fucking gangbang! No gangbang!" I was not going to be raped by stupid ero-sensei! No way at all!

"Alice-chan will you stop struggling?" Asked the pervert himself. I glared at him as he grabbed lower down my arms and hoisted me over his shoulder, "un!" I grunted as his incredibly bony shoulder dug into my stomach, "where the hell are we anyway?" I stared at the swaying, dirt ground of the main streets of Konoha as I waited for Kakashi-sensei's answer.

"Hmmm we're nearly at the Hokage-sama's office, I just thought we could take a little walk before we got there." I gave a dry laugh, "you just wanted to be late didn't you?" He hummed and kept walking, completely ignoring me that bastard!

I went into a daze as I stared at the ground, it was as close to daydreaming as I could get when I had a shoulder planted into my gut. I always daydream so it was so easy to just drop into the hazy state I normally go in, except, something was different. Instead of the calmness that descended over me and the usual fuzziness that went over the real world. Coldness began to make my hair on my head stand up, it slowly trickled down my back and I began to shiver. I could feel my heart begin to beat loudly throughout my body and it really, really hurt!

I snapped out of my stupor with a gasp, I was shaking and sweating, definitely not good.

"Alice?"

I stared up at Kakashi-sensei's worried face and did the most pitiful sound I have ever made. Seriously, it was like a mew of a kitten along with a sort of whining noise like a kicked puppy. Kakashi-sensei blinked and we were instantly transported in a swirl of blurring colour, this time, shushin didn't make me feel too good. I thought I was going to throw up as we landed on the rooftop outside the Hokage's office. Kakashi-sensei jumped through the open window with me pathetically flopping on his back, a great look for me.

"Oh Kakashi, is Alice-chan there with you?" I could hear the deep voice of Sarutobi talking to Kakashi-sensei, but I couldn't see him. "Will everyone stop calling me Alice-chan?" I slurred as I tried to lean over Kakashi-sensei to see Sarutobi, obviously I didn't go to well. "What has happened to her Kakashi?" Asked Sarutobi, "she looks awful. Alice-chan do you need a nurse?"

"I need Panadol," I moaned, "I need sleep." I felt Kakashi-sensei's grip slacken and took the chance to slide out of his grip. I collapsed on the ground and rolled until I hit something wooden, I dragged myself onto the chair and face planted onto the desk.

"Are you quite alright there?" Sarutobi had an amused voice as he gazed at me. I put my head up slightly, "hmmm…yes." I sat up fully and tried to blink away the throbbing headache that was building behind my eyes, "Hokage-sama?" His eyes bored into mine, "Alice-chan…do you understand what is going on?"

I felt my brow furrow as I thought,

Kissed by a death god

End up in a world that is not real…_at all_

Happened to end up with Team Seven

Mind fucked by kami-knows-what

"Uh no."

Sarutobi leaned forward and steepled his fingers, "can you tell us what just happened to you then?" I shifted nervously, "uhh I'm not too sure, but I'm pretty sure I have psychological damage. I believe I don't have brain damage since I haven't hit many head on anything and got a concussion." I hummed thoughtfully, "I often daydream and I have gotten quite good at it. I am able to block out everything, but the images of what I am seeing in my mind. I do that every time I don't have to be focused on anything, but this time it was different." I took a deep breath and tried to think about what had happened.

"I began to go into the usual daze, but then it was almost like…a cold..something trailed down me, it was really frightening and dark tasting. Do you know when you almost fall down something or get a really big shock? Well it was like that, tingly feeling and your heart suddenly pumps loud enough to feel it throughout your body. Not a nice feeling.." I trailed off and looked at Sarutobi seriously, "what is wrong with me?"

Sarutobi sighed and grabbed his pipe, filling it with tobacco and lighting it. He puffed on it and began to speak, "do you remember the first time you came into my office?" Rolling my eyes I replied, "yeah that was yesterday, I'm not senile." A hand cuffed my head and I turned to glare up at Kakashi-sensei, before wincing as my headache spiked again.

Sarutobi luckily chuckled, "yes well yesterday I placed a seal on you did I not?" I brushed a finger against my spine, "yeah it is useful, but a bit unreliable. Why is that?"

"Well Alice-chan it was quite.._interesting _when we met your…"

"Tenant," Kakashi-sensei chipped in helpfully.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I queried. "I am Alice and nobody else!" A hand pulled on my shoulder and Kakashi crouched down to my eye level, "Alice-chan it's hard to say this." I scowled at him, "just move your mouth and use that voice of yours." Kakashi-sensei's hand cracked my head again, "son of a-!" Another hand slapped my head, I scowled at him again, "continue then!"

"Yes well when Hokage-sama placed the seal on you it is only meant to cause a momentary pain." Kakashi frowned slightly, "instead you go and pass out on us!" I growled at him, "as if I would make myself pass out! I had no clue what happened to me, but I just assumed nothing had happened. I trusted you! Now your saying something did happen and it has something to do with something fucking living inside me or some crap!"

I was shaking in rage, I was ready to ignore that something had happened. There was a blank part in my memory then and I felt extremely weird when I had apparently come to. This was absolute bullshit!

"Alice-chan," said Sarutobi gently, "how did you get here?" I blinked, so he knew I wasn't from, I guess, this dimension? Universe? And by Kakashi-sensei's puzzled look, he didn't know. I sighed, "I was walking home from work…"

I explained how I had foolishly gone to check what the noise was, and ended up getting kissed by Shingami and thrown into darkness. Throughout the explanation, Sarutobi and Kakashi-sensei stayed silent and occasionally nodded, opting to simply listen to me.

"And that's when I woke up in the training field with Naruto and Sasuke being there." I fidgeted with my fingers as Sarutobi pondered over what I had said. "Alice-chan I am not going to beat around the bush here," said Sarutobi, "when I placed a seal on you, you fell unconscious." I nodded, we all already knew that, "your point is?"

"You have a piece of Shingami inside of you."

I blinked and then turned to Kakashi-sensei, "excuse me?" He gave a big sigh, "when you passed out, you awoke straight away. Only, it wasn't you. You were taken over by the piece of Shingami inside of you and it spoke to us, quite a peculiar thing to experience I may add."

I gazed at the desk in shock, a death god could take over me at any moment? I just..no this couldn't be! I could feel my heart begin to beat faster and breath came in haggard gasps, my hands shook as I grasped my head. This was not right, I don't want to have this! I want to go home, I want to..I want…

_I want you to succeed…_

I shuddered as the raspy voice echoed through my head. It seemed to stroke at my mind and whisper dark things to me. Nausea rolled over me and I could feel bile began to bubble up my throat.

_You are a chosen…..You are my prize._

"GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT!" I shrieked, "STOP TALKING TO ME!"

"Alice!"

I heard the shout as I began to claw at my face and ears, I don't want it….I don't want it. I didn't realise I was sobbing until my throat began to clog up and my shirt was wet with tears. "I d-don't wa-ant it."

I felt a chop at my neck and I thankfully sank into oblivion, no more….no more please.

* * *

I slowly made my way to consciousness, my throat was dry and sore, and my nose was also runny. A usual sign of crying. I groaned as I creaked open swollen eyes, rolling over I tried to get up, but a hand pushed me down. My face pushed into a soft warmth, I turned my head away from the pillow as I tried to breathe. "Who's there?" My voice sounded pathetically weak as I tried to see who was there.

"Tch, Yari Koi how weak."

I grit my teeth, of all the son of a bitches…"Sasuke," I said shortly, I managed to roll around and look at the stoic face of Sasuke. I struggled to sit upright and I leant against the wall the bed was against, "where the fuck am I?" A scowl came from Sasuke, "Kakashi just waltzed into my house and dropped you into my bed. He said you had passed out, _again." _He said the last part with a sneer, but I didn't talk back, I…..

"Oh Kami," I gasped, "it was real." I could feel tears beginning to gather in the corner of my eyes, crying one after the other was so sad and weak! Except, I had a death god inside of me, it could talk to me and…

I began to hyperventilate again, I choked as I tried to breathe and failed when no air got through the lump that was in my throat. I flailed in the sheets that covered me, everything was too constricting. I didn't have claustrophobia, but it felt like everything was wrapping itself around me and stopping me from breathing.

"Alice snap out of it," a hand cracked across my face and I screamed as I felt the cold presence rearing up. "Stop it, stay back, stay back!" I shoved at Sasuke as the coldness brought in freezing air that seemed to fill up my lungs with icy water.

_Kill him, kill the insolent mortal. He dare touch my vessel, my prize. Kill him and take his soul for us. For us…._

"NO!" I clawed at my face again and felt blood begin to pour down my face as the old scratches opened up again. The coldness spread up my arm and a hand grabbed one that was clawing my face. One of my hands scrabbled at the hand that was so cold it burned to touch, they both slapped against my face and body. I screamed as something warm fell against me, it was so hot! It burned! Fire began to lick at me and it hurt so much to feel the burn of cold and heat battle against each other.

So painful…

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Sasuke held unsurely as she struggled and screamed. Each scream hurt his ears, but he couldn't do anything except hold her so she wouldn't hurt herself. His arms and chest were burning as cold fire was pressed against him from Alice's body.

_Damn it Kakashi, why did you leave me with this?_

Sasuke didn't know how long he sat there holding Alice, but his arms were tired by the time she stopped. "Are you done having your little tantrum?" Sasuke didn't really know how to handle this situation so he was hoping Alice would retort with something snappy, like normal.

"Sorry for the wait Pretty Boy," she smiled weakly up at him. Her side ponytail was now lank with sweat and her face was marred with long lines of bloody scratches, not a pretty sight. Her fingers brushed against her face, "damn I really did a number on myself." She groaned and stretched her arms out in front, "what the-"

Sasuke discreetly unclasped his arms from Alice and shifted away, "what the hell is wrong with your arms?"

Alice's right arm had the slightly pink mark from the boiling water of that morning, but the rest was a splotchy red. Just like burn marks. Her other arm though, was way worse. It was a mottled pale blue and white, the fingernails were a black colour along with some parts of the fingers. "It looks like," began Sasuke, "frostbite," agreed Alice. She gazed at the appendages solemnly and continued to curl her fingers out and in.

"Well it has full mobility on both arms so it should be fine," shrugged Alice as she pushed herself upright more. She shoved Sasuke off the bed and stood up to stretch, "ugghh so stiff." Sasuke picked himself up with a glare, "geez just push me off my own bed that I let you stay in."

"Yeah that made me wonder," mused Alice, "why did you let me stay in your bed? Last night you left me to freeze in that dungeon downstairs!" She stopped to gaze around the room they were in, "you're a very boring person you know? Everything is dark colours and stuff, how about some orange or nice green?" Sasuke hit her, "don't turn into Naruto on me!"

"Oh does Naruto like orange?" Said Alice sarcastically, "I didn't know!" A scowl was thrown her way, "don't be a bigger bitch," said Sasuke. A snort came from the moving Alice, "ciao amigo." She skipped out of the room and down the stairs, Sasuke followed behind sullenly.

Alice stopped in the kitchen, "so what are you doing home?" She hopped up on the wooden table and swung her legs, "did you have fun with Kakashi-clone?"

"Shut up," said Sasuke, "he let us go home for lunch." He pushed the girl off the table, "don't sit on the table!" Alice slid off, "then stop changing the subject! Why did you let me stay in your bed? Not to take advantage of me I hope, you're not my type."

"Shut up!" Exclaimed a flustered Sasuke, "you say why you had a breakdown and I'll.."

"Explain why you're so angst ridden?"

"What the hell do you mean?!"

"I mean you're all emo and broody, you couldn't have always been like that."

"I'm not emo!"

"Could've fooled me."

"Oh Kami I will-" Sasuke took a deep breath and calmed himself down, "what I experienced is something you would never relate to." He clenched his fist, "it is my pain and my revenge! I-"

"Don't especially care for this shitty monologue," deadpanned Alice, "get to the point Flower." Sasuke glared at her, "a person like you would never understand what I feel for _that man, _I am an avenger!"

"Avengers assemble!" Chirped Alice, "always~ we will fight as one, until the battle's won~ "

"What the **hell** is that?" Asked Sasuke, "how dare you not know!" Gasped Alice, "Thor smite your ungodly, pasty ass!" Sasuke recoiled, "don't bring my ass into this!" Obnoxious laughter came from Alice, "you're so cute!" She patted his head mockingly, "now tell me your emo story."

Not after throwing a glare at the laughing Alice, Sasuke began a vague description of how his family and clan was massacred. He looked angry at how his mother and father was killed in front of him. He didn't say who killed them all (*cough*Itachi*cough*), but Alice just sat there and listened, it was different hearing it come from Sasuke's mouth. He finished the story and bowed his head, the two had somehow managed to get up and sit next to each other on the table.

"That does explain the pole up your ass," remarked a quiet Alice. She swung her legs out in front of her and hummed thoughtfully. Sasuke looked up at her surprised, "so you're not going to say sorry?" Alice stared at him, "why would I do that? It's useless and annoying for people to say that to those who have lost people. Besides I didn't kill your family, it's not my fault."

The two sat in silence for a moment and stared absently at Alice's swinging feet. Sasuke broke the silence when he turned to Alice, "so why'd you breakdown?" A heavy sigh came from the brunette, "_apparently, _I'm possessed." Sasuke choked, "possessed? What are you on?" Alice glared sullenly at her legs, "I'm not joking! I have a piece of the soul of Shingami himself! Kakashi-sensei and the Hokage told me that when they placed the translating seal on me, the soul took possession of my body for a while." Sasuke nodded thoughtfully, "that did explain the KI and the way your eyes were yellow."

"My eyes were yellow?" Shrieked Alice, "oh come on!" Sasuke rolled his eyes, "come on, I'll put some ointment on your face and arms." Alice grinned as she slid off the table, "so you're not freaked out by me?" Sasuke turned to her, "you're still a loudmouth bitch," his mouth twitched up in an almost smile before he walked off.

Alice's face broke out in the biggest grin yet,

_Maybe Sasuke isn't a total dickwad._

* * *

**Holy shiznit I am dying here. It went all angsty and I just wanted to stop then, but it took over me. I don't plan this out, I just write in the spur of the moment, so I was surprised when it was all 'omg I have Shingami in me!' *Claw my eyes out.***

**Fuck this is hard.**

**No actually, writing those fucking adorable, touching moments between Alice and Sasuke makes me want to burn my eyes out. The only way to describe Sasuke's actions is glare, sneer, scowl, etc. Writing him say something nice to anyone is **_**wrong, **_**I try and make it realistic, but Sasuke's a dick. Kami kill me now.**

**You guys better be grateful for this absolute hell-raiser.**

**Laters.**


	6. Act 1 Part 3: Team 7 Harmony?

**Nngghhh….I am so fucking done. This writing is actually doing my head in. Had a four hour car trip earlier today and managed to write a five thousand word chapter for my other story, I am sort of, but not really looking forward to this. Sorry in advance if this is shit…**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Meh I own this shiny laptop, but I don't own Naruto_

**Warning: **_Fucking language_

* * *

**3rd Person P.O.V.**

"What the fuck are we doing?" Moaned Alice as she followed Sasuke through the streets, she stumbled over a small dog that ran under her feet. "Does everything just run free here? I mean kids just seem to have no rules at all, they can go wherever the hell they want!"

And it was true. Kids were running everywhere. Most were holding wooden shuriken and playing ninja. The game seemed to be played all throughout the streets of Konoha, Alice could even see some kids that had scrambled on the rooftops and were continuing the game there.

"How do you play ninja Mr Chatterbox?" Asked Alice as she excitedly watched a bunch of kids come charging through a clear spot in the street.

Sasuke ignored her question and continued to walk on. "Fine," huffed Alice, "I'll just ask the cool kids on the block!"

She stepped into the path of the bunch of kids that were running towards her, "excuse me ninjas!" They skidded to a stop and gazed up with happy grins, "what can I do for ya miss?" Asked a gap-toothed boy that was at the front of the pack. Alice squatted down to his level, "I was wondering if you handsome boys can tell me how to play ninja. You guys seem to be true warriors that know what you're doing!" All of the boys blushed and stuttered, "are you a foreigner miss?" Asked a blond boy as he grabbed onto her hair, "your voice sounds funny."

Alice gave a little chuckle, "why yes I am a foreigner. How smart of you to realise!" She ruffled the blonds' hair and laughed when he blushed even brighter, the other boys all clamoured loudly, "a foreigner? So cool!"

"Well miss," began the blond, "we're on teams and you have to hide, or you're seeking. If you're found, the enemy ninja will attack and kill you with their shuriken!" He showed Alice the worn wooden shuriken they were using, "and then you're dead! Our team is the green team, the other is the blue team, the enemy nin!"

"Oh my it sounds like a fearsome game," grinned Alice, "mind if I play with you guys?" The boys happily exclaimed out and tackled her, "nee-chan's playing!" Alice laughed even harder under the pile of boys that had dog-piled on her, "let's go win the war!"

* * *

Sasuke noticed his chatty companion had finally stopped trying to talk to him. He glanced around bemused, "where the hell could that bitch be?" He did a revolution in the middle of the street to spot Alice, and managed to catch a glimpse of the girls long hair swaying as she walked. The only problem was, she was at least two hundred meters back the way they had come from.

And it was bargain day at the market.

"Are you freaking joking?!" Hissed Sasuke as he began to fight his way through the rush of people, "I ignore her for ten minutes and she decides to gallivant off on a grand adventure!" He growled as a lady smacked him in the face with her purse, "Kami damn this child!"

Frustrated by the lack of progress, Sasuke leapt onto the nearby roofs of the buildings either side of the street. He then made his way along the rooftops, following the street to hopefully where Alice was. Within a minute he caught another glimpse of the girl, and she wasn't alone.

She was laughing as a boy piggybacked on her and another hung of her neck, there were two more on each leg, but that didn't seem to slow her down as another boy guided her by tugging on her long ponytail. A swarm of boys surrounded her and formed a protective cocoon as they rushed out the street and into a plaza.

"We've got a new player!" Called out the blond boy that was leading Alice, the entourage stopped in front of another mob of young boys. Both teams had a distinctive item of colour among them, the team that surrounded Alice had blue pieces of clothing strung all over them while the other had green.

Alice grinned and attempted a wave at the other team, "I'm Alice and I want to learn how to play ninja!" The blond boy smiled toothily up at her, "yeah nee-chan's a foreigner and she's the best nee-chan ever!" Alice shrugged disarmingly, "I try my best, but I love the fact you call me nee-chan."

"Can we call you nee-chan too Alice?" Asked a bespectacled boy on the green team, he smiled shyly up at her. "Off course you can sweetheart," gushed Alice, "as long as I can call you cutie!" The boy blushed and nodded even as the other kids all yelled out that she be their nee-chan too.

"I'll be all your nee-chan's okay?" Alice lowered the boys off her neck and back before gently nudging the boys on her feet off. She straightened up with a grin, "Kaigo here," she looked down at the blond by still holding her hair, "explained to me how to play ninja, is it okay for me to play?"

"Of course Alice-nee!" Chirped a brunette, "but your team is still a player short."

Conveniently Sasuke decided to reveal himself at that moment, "Alice we are going to training now." He walked away expecting the girl to follow him obediently.

As if, this is Alice we're talking about.

"You don't rule me duck-ass," sneered Alice, "go to training and I'll eventually come." She turned her back on the fuming Sasuke, "it's not even my training!" Sasuke grabbed her shoulder roughly and turned her around, "you said you wanted to be a ninja right? So you need to train!"

"Nee-chan is going to be a ninja?" Asked Kaigo, "nee-chan is so cool!" He then let go off her ponytail to grab her arms, "are your arms bandaged from awesome ninja training?" Alice managed to cover up the wince that came with the spark of pain from her arms, "not really Kaigo-kun. Sunshine here helped the right arm, but it was something bad that hurt my left, not exactly an awesome ninja am I?"

"Nee-chan is always awesome!" Called out a boy as he hugged Alice's waist, "bad duck-ass is bad!" The other boys yelled out in agreement and glared at an already annoyed Sasuke, "bad duck-ass!"

Sasuke growled, if he was late, there might be the whip again! He rolled his eyes when Alice sent a smug smirk his way, "one game Death boy and we won't be late since Kakashi-sensei is always late! Just chillax and join in on the fun! Be a good nii-san to this cuties."

The boys all took this as a cue to direct puppy eyes at the Uchiha, but it was Alice's huge, emerald eyes that convinced the Uchiha in the end.

"Fine," he sighed. He ignored the giant squeal of happiness that came from Alice, or the hug that she briefly gave him.

"Okay troopers are you ready?!" She yelled out.

"Yes nee-chan, yes!" Cheered the kids, "green team seeks and blue team hides. ONE, TWO, THREE, GO!"

* * *

"I haven't had this much fun with kids for a while," panted out Alice as she leant against the wall she was hidden behind. She turned to her two partners, "how do you think we're going?"

Sasuke grunted, "don't really know, I lost count of the time after we crawled through the vents of that coffee shop. How did you know that was there?" He asked the boy nestled in Alice's lap. Kaigo gave a grin, "my mummy owns the shop and sometimes lets me play in the shop. I found the vents led outside when I accidentally threw my toy up there."

The boys' eyes were temporarily covered by the floppy, green beanie he was wearing to show his team colours. Alice giggled and pushed it back up for him, "I simply love that beanie of yours!" Kaigo blushed deeply, "I like your headband nee-chan, you look really, really pretty!"

Alice touched the strip of checkered, green cloth she was wearing as a headband. Her hair had fallen out long ago and the band kept the stray wisps of hair out of her face, her fringe was still out though and she brushed the bangs out of her face. "Thanks Kaigo-kun, that means a lot from a cutie like you."

Sasuke thought she looked different. Her eyes seemed to be brighter when she wore that headband. Her hair also looked different, it made her look more girly.

"Hn," he grunted through the green scarf he was wearing, "are we going to find a new hiding spot?" His arm was grabbed as Alice stood up and grabbed Kaigo's hand, "yep! Let's go Team Fabulous!" She then raced out of the alleyway they were hiding in and ran towards the more cluttered part of the district.

Sasuke let her pull him along this time, he didn't want to admit it, but this was actually fun. When he was younger kids wouldn't invite him to play ninja, they all thought he would be too cool to play with them. And they wondered why he ignored them in later years the idiots.

* * *

"Oh man I'm tired," groaned out Alice as she stretched. The game had lasted nearly an hour and the green team had won in the end from a boy Ringo's excellent hiding in the nearby river. Alice and Sasuke were making their way into Team Seven's training ground, they were a little late but it would be fine. Kakashi was always late.

"Yo Naruto and Sakura!" Alice called out to the two ninjas that were sitting under the shade of a tree.

"YOU'RE LATE!" Screamed out Naruto and Sakura, "wait you're not Kakashi-sensei," blinked Naruto.

"Sasuke-kun where have you been?" Asked Sakura, "you're late!" She shot a look at Alice, "what have you two been doing? Alone?"

"Having sweet sex," said Alice with a straight face, "what else?"

There was dead silence. All of Team Seven stared at Alice with unconcealed horror, "WHAT?!"

Alice's straight face suddenly cracked into a blinding grin, "HOLY SHIT YOUR FACES!" She let out a howl of laughter before dropping to the floor in spasms of laughter, "O-OH MY SWEET JASHIN THAT WAS TOO GOOD! I WAS F-FREAKI-NG JOKING GUYS! I WOULD NEVER SELL MY VIRGINITY TO THIS ASS OF A GUY!" She let out some more chuckles before struggling upright, she wiped some tears that collected in her eyes, "that's too good."

"Don't ever do that again," deadpanned Sasuke, "never again." Sakura could only nod in agreement, "never…"

"I thought it was pretty scary that Teme had been finally jumped by a fangirl," confessed Naruto, "then I realised that you were joking."

"What gave it away," Alice said, "the laughing or the yelling that I didn't do it?" Naruto shrugged, "a bit of both really."

"Sarcasm is not appreciated enough," said Alice dramatically, "you horrible people." She then glared at Naruto, "hey! I am definitely not a fangirl!" She then looked away bashfully, "well not for Emo here."

"Y-you're a real fangirl?" Gasped Naruto, "who for?"

"You guys wouldn't know they were," Alice waved them off, "but they are amazing!" She than sighed dreamily, _'Tobito, Sasori and Deidara….I guess Gaara and Lee are included as well, but they're not quite as hot as those three…mmm hot bad guys…' _She blinked and snapped out of her daze, "I'm just not obsessive, scary, chase you down fangirl. I admire their courage and strength, the people I admire are those that have overcome great and horrific events in their pasts. Some just have not come off for the better…"

Alice suddenly broke out in a cheeky grin, "so Sasuke…who are you a fangirl for?"

"Idiot," drawled Sasuke as he flicked the back of her head. "Ow you douche!" Alice grabbed her head and glared at Sasuke, "you realise that means payback!" Sasuke snorted at her, "what are you going to do weakling?"

With a cry Alice launched herself at the Uchiha. Sasuke, not expecting her to attack, was pushed down into the ground by her flying tackle. The two began to throw punches at each other, but were constricted by the fact they were tumbling around on the ground.

Alice suddenly kicked the Uchiha in the gut and held him away with her legs, Sasuke couldn't any closer to her torso since her legs were so long. "Point for the tall chick!" Crowed Alice as she vibrated his feet against Sasuke, "why aren't you getting out of this master ninja?"

"Because you're pressing me against a tree you ass," Sasuke said with a quavering voice. Alice laughed at that, "your voice sounds retarded!"

"Your face is retarded!" Sasuke scowled at her as he managed to overpower Alice's legs and push them up. He began to push them higher and higher as he walked towards the suddenly panicking girl. "Don't do that you psycho," Alice groaned as her legs were slowly pushed over her head.

When Sasuke reached just behind her head, Alice cried out, and then began to cry. Sasuke instantly dropped her legs and looked at her worriedly, "oh damn are you alright?"

Although Sasuke was an ass, he was a guy. And we all know that when girls, guys don't expect to cry-cry-they get a little freaked out and worried. Sasuke wasn't an exception, it didn't help he was slightly socially stunted and didn't know what to do in this situation.

Sasuke repeated his question and crept slowly closer to the crying girl that was in the fetal position. He reached a hand out to her, "hey Alice are yo-"

Her hand suddenly lashed out and grabbed his arm, she pulled him in close and rolled him over her body. She pinned him down and gave him a foxy smile, "you fell for the oldest trick in the book dumbass!"

And it was true, Alice's face was perfectly dry and fine, there was no sign that she had been crying at all.

"I thought that you had actually hurt her Teme," commented Naruto, "it sure seemed like it. How the hell did you do that Alice?" The girl in question shrugged and got off Sasuke, "I've always been good at acting and fake crying was something I just picked up, I remember at school I fake cried and got my friend in trouble." She frowned at Sakura's disapproving look, "no I didn't do it to be a whiny bitch. I did it as a joke between us, she was just told off so it was fine."

"Why are you a troublemaker?" Hissed Sakura, "shouldn't you be spending more time actually learning something?" She had said it in a rather venomous voice that Alice frowned at, "I am not a proper troublemaker, that is the class clowns job and the popular boys of the class. My job is to add witty and sarcastic comments for my friends, it's not my fault I'm just a bit loud sometimes." She then gave Sakura a piercing look, "I have been going to school for nine years now and I am in a selective high school. That means I am in the top twenty percent of the kids in my region and the region down south of mine. This pretty much means that out of five Konoha areas, I would be one of the smartest kids in that region." She cocked her head to the side, "do you still consider me to be an idiot?"

Sakura looked away abashed, "no I believe not." She fiddled with her dress and didn't look up at Alice, who then sighed, "girl there is no need to be all regretful and shit." She draped an arm over Sakura's shoulder, "if I met me, I would think I was a dumbass to."

"Thank Kami I'm not the only one," breathed Naruto, "I really thought you were an idiot for a while there."

Alice snapped her gaze up to him, "I said I was a dumbass not an idiot! Payback time buddy!" She grabbed the blond in a headlock and began to grind her knuckles against his head, "noogie time nerd!" Naruto cried out and squirmed underneath her arm, "what is the difference between a dumbass and an idiot?!"

"Everything!" Yelled back Alice as she got pulled to the ground by the flailing Naruto. The two began to wrestle, but their match was a dust cloud with comical noises emitting from it.

"Tch what losers," scoffed Sasuke as he watched the duo fight coolly. A jumpsuited arm grabbed his in a death grip, "you're coming in too Teme!" Sasuke didn't have enough time to make a sound as he was dragged into the expanding dust cloud.

The sounds of the fight, although loud, didn't reach Sakura's thoughts.

'_Alice forgave me even after I was so rude to her, she has been only nice to me and all I've done is be judgemental and jealous. She had said she wasn't a fangirl of Sasuke-kun and she seems to hate him, so I have no reason to be jealous of her.' _She nodded decisively as she watched her teammates and Alice fight, _'Sasuke-kun pays attention to her since she doesn't fawn over him like I do. I will try to do better, both as a person and to Alice. This I promise.'_

Sakura felt slightly better after her small epiphany, she had been feeling jealous of Alice since she seemed to have all of Sasuke-kun that Sakura had wanted. She had gone into the Uchiha's house, something all fangirls had wanted to see forever, and she had even slept there! She also seemed to have been doing things around town with Sasuke-kun since they had nearly been late to training, and Sasuke-kun was never late to training!

But all of those things were assumptions, Alice seemed to be stealing Sasuke-kun, but by the way Alice acted it wasn't correct. She joked around with the Uchiha like she would do to a brother or a friend, she also held slight amnesty with him judging by the way she called him stupid names, but not by his real name. Sakura let a small smile grace her face, she would try to befriend the girl, and heaven forbid that girl needed a level-headed girl friend.

"You're coming in too Sakura!" Alice grabbed Sakura and plunged back into the fight with the pinkette in tow, "don't fight it!"

* * *

"Ah I'm sore now!"

"Shut up Alice," said Sasuke, "we don't need to hear your whining. The fight was your idea anyway." Alice shot a glare at Sasuke, "I didn't expect you guys to break out your funky ninja moves, I **am **a civilian, remember?"

"Both of you just calm down," sighed Sakura, "we don't need to start another fight. The pink haired girl was nursing a rather swollen cheek courteous of Sasuke himself. Don't worry though, she had repaid him back with a punch to the gut. Of course she thought it was Naruto who had punched her otherwise she would have never hit Sasuke, the dust just made it kind of hard to see. But for all the pain that Sakura felt, she had actually quite…enjoyed it. She had liked to roughhouse with her teammates, it was quite liberating to finally let go of that girly mask she always put on, and to just let Inner out for a slam match.

"Damn Sakura that is some mean right hook you've got there," commented Alice as she checked over her body for any bruises. "Yeah Sakura-chan that was amazing!" Cheered Naruto, "you were all like bam! Pow! I'm gonna beat you down and stuff!"

Sakura bit back the usual comments that would come whenever Naruto had complimented her, he didn't want a date he was…actually complimenting her. He had no ulterior motive, this was Naruto for Kami sake, he didn't have an ulterior motive. He was open and straightforward, he had never tricked Sakura in any way before, maybe Sakura had been too harsh on him before…

"Thanks Naruto," Sakura smiled at him unsurely and was rewarded with a mega-watt grin from Naruto. "Anytime Sakura-chan! You **are **really amazing!"

"Yeah Sakura you have a lot of strength behind your attacks," said Alice. She leant forward on her knees, "I think if you properly utilise that strength in your own taijutsu style you would be a deadly opponent!"

"You're a civilian," said Sasuke incredulously, "how can you be the judge of if Sakura is a good ninja or not?" He didn't say anymore since Alice's punch in the arm distracted him, "what the hell was that for?!"

"For being a bigger ass than usual," scowled Alice, "**you **can't judge her since you're a self-absorbed, cruel, heartless asshole that doesn't give a time of day for anyone else than you!" She finished with a glare and another punch in the arm.

"Oooh," gasped Naruto as he looked between Sasuke and Alice, "she got you there Teme!"

"Shut up Dobe," snapped Sasuke. "Hey don't be a jerk to Naruto now," admonished Alice, "he got a whole heap of good hits on you with his unorthodox moves. His style may be slightly sloppy, but the chaotic style works well for him and confuses his opponents when he cleverly uses the landscape for his gain."

"That was..actually a really good analyse," said Sakura hesitantly, "how did you do that with one fight?"

'_Watched the series, read fan fiction and read several pretty much essays on characters styles of fighting, etc, etc.'_

"Well I really suck at learning things when they are explained through theory, written down, or simply being shown to me." Alice flashed them a grin, "I am better when I try myself and make a theory myself. I simply experienced Naruto's style and analysed his fight, blah, blah, blah."

"Way to be modest," muttered Sasuke. "I'm sorry," Alice leant in with a hand cupped over her ear, "I couldn't hear you over the fact that I." She slapped his head, "do not give a fuck!" Sasuke snarled at her and then slapped her head. This, of course, started a slapping match between the two.

"Slapping is for girls Teme," said Naruto with a foxy grin, "Sasuke's a girl! Sasuke's a girl!" He then tensed for the hit that normal came from Sakura whenever he insulted her Sasuke-kun.

"Stop being an ass Naruto," Sakura huffed before turning to Alice, "ano…I've been a bit of a bitch lately."

"Maa we have our off days," Alice slapped her back, "don't beat yourself up about it! All females are bitches, just some days we're scarier and snappier than usual!"

"Yes well," Sakura narrowed her eyes at Alice, "I just wanted to say sorry. I have been rude and jealous of you and I am sorry for it. To repay you, I was wondering if I could do anything for the injuries on your arms, I noticed they were bandaged so…"

"Yeah why are they bandaged like that Alice?" Naruto leant forward and poked at her left arm, "do they hurt when I poke 'em?"

"Don't poke her injured arms you retard," scolded Sakura as she slapped Naruto's hands away, "may I see the injuries? I do have some medical knowledge from books I have read and from what first aid my mum has taught me."

Alice fiddled with the bandages, "I guess you can.." She slowly unwrapped her right arm, "this was from dumbass over there," she thumbed at Sasuke, "he dropped boiling water on my arm this morning."

"That was definitely your fault," scoffed Sasuke as he crossed his arms, he turned away with a slight huff.

"Whatever Drama queen," muttered Alice, the last of the bandages came off to reveal pink and slightly fleshy skin. "Did it look this bad before Mr Dramatic?" She twisted the arm around to look at all sides, "it looks a little worse than before. Was that ointment you used for burns as well?"

Sasuke shrugged, "it was a healing cream that my..mother used to put on my cuts and bruises, I never burnt myself like you retard." He poked the arm, "does this hurt?"

"Yes you idiot!" Screamed Alice as she cradled her arm protectively, "that was a dick move!"

"Everybody just calm down," Sakura pushed Sasuke back and gently clasped Alice's arm. She studied the arm closely, "so you say boiling water did this? Well there **is **a burn that is slightly more healed here, but the others…This almost looks like your skin has been exposed to a continuous amount of heat, almost like you have been sunburnt or overheated. This is common when those who experience **cold **flushes have an extremely warm object pressed to their skin, this then creates a burning effect. What was the object that touched you?"

Alice stared at Sakura, "well Sasuke touched me there and also on my torso area, but it is not burnt there." She then waited for Sakura to flip out that her crush had touched another girl, but there was nothing. Sakura merely gritted her teeth for a moment before composing herself, "human body temperature will be higher than whoever is having a cold flush so that explains that arm. I will try my best to look up a remedy tonight, but if I can't you may have to go to the hospital."

Alice nodded absentmindedly before beginning to unroll the bandages on her left arm, "this one may be a bit stranger."

Sakura instantly recoiled at the sight that she saw. "Oh my kami.." breathed Naruto as he looked over her arm. Sasuke flinched slightly, but that was because Alice's arm looked worse than before.

Her arm was a grotesque white with blue veins bulging out, the nails were also a dark colour along with the tip of her fingers. She flexed the hand before putting it in front of Sakura for inspection, "have fun with this. Sasuke and I believe it is like a frost burn or bite, but I'm no medical expert."

"And neither am I," said Sakura grimly, "how the hell did you do this?"

"I can't tell you that," Alice stared blankly at Sakura, "I would rather not." Sakura hummed slightly, "suit yourself. I can't do anything on this until I understand it more, can explain the symptoms and occurrence in which this happened."

"Well I can't say the specifics of what happened," Alice tapped her arm thoughtfully, "I had cold racing up and down my arms, like a cold fire ya know. Then it had pins and needles, but now it's just numb, I literally can not feel anything!"

Naruto whacked her arm, "you can't feel this?!" Alice snapped and growled at him, "no but you will feel my boot up your ass if you do that again!"

Naruto flinched slightly and wisely stopped.

Sakura stood up and stretched, "I'll grab some medical books in the library after training to fix your arms. I just hope I can find something to help that frozen arm of yours."

"Speaking of training," interrupted Sasuke, "Kakashi won't be here for nearly another hour. What are we going to do now?"

Alice suddenly jumped up excitedly, "oh I know! I know! Kill the dill with the pill!"

"What is that?" Naruto squinted at Alice, "it just sounds really stupid and confusing." Alice just winked at him, "but you know you'll love it! It's a simple game. You have the dill, a person, who changes throughout the game. The dill is whoever has the possession of the pill, we normally use a footy, but you guys obviously won't have one. This means we could use something like a scroll, or whatever! But we will have a certain playing area, the training grounds, and the dill simply has to keep possession of the pill. Everyone else is trying to 'kill' the dill, that means we'll tackle the sucker into the ground and wrestle the pill from them!"

Alice whipped her hair up into her side ponytail, "let's get started!"

* * *

**Yeah I hope that is good enough for you guys. I haven't really wrote many chapters since I've also been writing for my other story, I have wrote four chapters in total in the last week since in the first week my comp demanded my attention. That ass.**

**Can people please give me some suggestions of what to call Sasuke. I am trying to change his name every time Alice talks to him, but it's hard trying to think up another name for him. His main ones will be: Duck-ass, Princess, Icy, Sunshine and Emo. Please help me!**

**Sakura has reached a little epiphany here cos I want to write this story with a Team Seven Sakura, not fucking cannon Sakura. She's annoying and it won't benefit this story.**

**This story is a semi-serious, semi joking story. Alice will eventually begin to fix things in the storyline, just you wait for the fuck ups that will come along. MWAHAHAHA! **

**Yes well, anyway, Naruto didn't say much. Sasuke and Alice were the main focus alongside Sakura's little thoughts. We met Alice's soft side with children. We also met little Kaigo, he may come up later or something cos I don't name my OC's unless they actually do something. I will not name every tom, Jim or Joe that fucking comes through this story.**

**Thanks y'all.**


	7. Act 1 Part 4: Screw the laws!

**Back again yay!**

**So I still don't have any wifi, but I have come back from my trip. Although you guys will be reading this when I have my wifi, I don't now. And that's really sad. I only have a 16 GM modem for each month and the bloody device has gone on the fritz, hopefully it will be fixed soon though.**

**Can't wait.**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Currently drawing, writing, but not owning_

**Warning: **_Language, duh!_

* * *

**Alice P.O.V (it's been a while)**

"I'm singing, ring-ding-dinging, oh I'm singing a song. If you want to, you can come too, and sing a song with me. Oh I'm-"

"Can you shut up!"

I stopped my impromptu singing and glared at Sasuke, "someone's in a pissy mood yeah?"

"Could you please stop saying yeah all the time!" He seemed rather snappy and irritable today, though I had no idea why.

"Are you on your male PMS?" I quirked my eyebrow at the pissy Uchiha, "because you've seem to have forgotten that I can't control my verbal ticks and I'm unlucky enough to have revisited the yeah stage. Again. I should not have thought about dub Deidara…" I trailed off absently, I didn't know why, but I had been thinking about home a lot recently. I really hope Sasuke didn't hear me last night, I had realised that I would never see my brother again…

Not unless I found a way to somehow transport myself through time and space. The only way I could do that was if I managed to convince that douche inside of me to transport me back, but I had a feeling that it wouldn't do that. My other option was….fuinjutsu!

I ignored Sasuke's snappish attitude, screw his pissy tantrums, I was going to find a way home! It may just take a fair time of studying…and I thought I had gotten away from school and it's never ending studying.

"Is there a library for ninjas?" I shook Sasuke back and forth by his shoulders, "I need to know now. It's urgent, yeah!"

"Let go of me bitch," Sasuke slapped my hands away and stood up off the ground we had been 'training' on. It was really Sasuke teaching me basic stances for taijutsu and then making me attack him so he could practise using his sharingan. Real selfish isn't he? The first chance I get to learn taijutsu and it's a ten minute lesson for Sasuke's benefit. When I told him he was an ass-among other words-and quit, that might've been the start of his hissy fit.

"C'mon douchebag!" I used my puppy eyes on Sasuke, "pretty please with a cherry-on-top." I pushed out my bottom lip in hopefully what was a pout and gathered up tears in the corners of my eyes. "Pllleeeaaaasssseeeee." I took in a big breath, "pppplllllleeeeeaaaaassssseeeeee-"

"Okay if you just shut up I'll tell you!" My face was shoved away by Sasuke's hand, but that didn't matter, I was off to a library. Yay! I'm coming back old friend.

Sasuke shoved his hands in his pockets as he led me away from the training grounds. I quietly followed him as he led me through the streets of Konoha, quite a fair way through Konoha might I add.

We stopped outside a large, old building which Sasuke gestured at, "this is Konoha's library. Civilians and ninjas alike can go in here," he then smirked smugly, "but only ninjas can go into the ninja sections. You need a headband as proof, and this time, you can't bluff your way through it!"

I nodded gratefully to him, "thanks for showing me here, you don't have to stay here, I can find my way hom-back to your place, yeah?" I smiled at him even as he scowled at me, "I'll see you in an hour or so yeah."

"Tch," scoffed Sasuke, "more like a minute."

I ignored him and continued up the stairs to the reception just inside the entrance. I stopped in front of the desk and coughed politely to get the woman busily working there to look up. She glared up at me with bespectacled eyes, "child there better be a good reason why you're interrupting me work, hmm?"

I smiled at her nervously and felt myself revert to polite child mode, "ano I'm very sorry to bother you miss. I seem to have a problem you see, and I need to go into the ninja section to help me fix it, yeah?"

The lady harrumphed angrily at me, "child only ninjas can go in there and only civilians of Konoha can go inside _my _library. Get out of here _foreigner_!"

I flinched at the harsh way she spoke to me but continued to press my point. It was a risky move, and I didn't know how it would plan out, but I had to try it. I leant in close to the lady and cupped my mouth like I was telling a secret, in which, I was.

"Miss what you're about to hear is an S-class secret that only Hokage-sama, the famous Copy-nin Kakashi, and the last of the Uchiha, Uchiha Sasuke, know." I felt the woman stiffen and lean in even closer to hear me, "continue child."

I managed to swallow the wicked grin that threatened to cover my face and continue on with my bluff, of truth. "You see I _am _a foreigner, one that whose matters have been directed under Hokage-sama personally. My.._condition _is highly confidential and I need to know how to control the aspect of me that comes along with it. You see….that boy Uzumaki Naruto..you know of him and what he holds, yeah?" I felt the woman tremble slightly as she stayed stock still, "well my condition, is one of a higher calibre. What I hold is something that far outweighs the amount of death that the Kyuubi no Yoko can bring." I chuckled sinisterly to seal the deal and leant back with a perfectly innocent expression on my face, "you understand my situation now don't you?"

As the woman nodded vigorously I smiled sweetly at her, "thank you miss. Now if you tell anyone, I'll know~" I tapped my nose with a wink, "only high-ranking people know of this secret and I'm sure they won't be happy when their new weapon's secret is compromised yeah?" I turned away as the woman nodded vigorously again, and calmly walked into the ninja section of the library.

Once I was there though, I hurried to a secluded part of the library. I tucked myself in the corner of a pair of shelves and sunk to the ground shaking. Nausea swept over me as I thought about what I had just done, I had twisted someone's mind and used blackmail and threatening to get what I wanted. Was it the thing inside me or me, myself, that compelled me to do that? And to revel in the feeling it gave me too?

I shudder as a cold feeling passed over me, and flinched when the all-too-familiar voice crept into my mind.

_What's wrong child? You have gotten what you wanted, as my chosen you are meant to use those lesser than you to get to your goals. Wrap their mortal minds around your finger, seize them, and use them for your gain._

A hissing laugh made me shiver even harder, 'get out of my mind you bastard!'

_My child, you have done so well. Let some of the darkness take over you….You are meant to keep balance in this world, you can not do so if you aren't balanced yourself. There is too much goodness in your soul, just let yourself be corrupted by death, just a little bit, and everything will seem so much better._

I relaxed as the voice wrapped around me, just let the darkness take you over….just a little bit, everything will be fine….all will be fine…

I snarled and snapped my head back, 'I will never do that! Screw you asshole! I won't be your puppet, now fuck off!' I shoved the cold presence down and imagined locking it deep down inside of me…where it was dark and cold, the part of me that seemed to crack that little bit more…

"There you are."

I jumped, "holy shit!" Sasuke's slight laugh caught my attention and I scowled up at him as he stood above me with a smirk plastered on his face. "Don't scare a girl like that you asshole!" I shoved at his legs angrily. "What girl," he sneered, "all I see is some crazy bitch that.." He trailed off gazed at me with such scrutiny that I fidgeted slightly, "what you douche?"

"It happened again didn't it?" I froze and carefully looked up at Sasuke, "w-what do you mean?" I chuckled nervously and scratched my head, "what are you talking about yeah?" He scoffed and crouched down in front of me, "don't lie to me Alice."

My eyes widened in shock, that was one of the only times he had actually called me by my name. I hung my head and stared down at the dark carpet between my curled up knees, "yeah it did." I didn't look up as I felt Sasuke sit down opposite me, I did look up though, when he nudged me with his foot.

He was mimicking my position with his arms wrapped around his knees, "what did it say this time? Was it something to do with the terrified reception lady, or how you managed to get into a civilian restricted section?"

I nodded sullenly, "I-I don't even know if it was it or..me this time. I just thought I would bluff my way past by telling her the truth that I needed to learn things in the ninja section for my _condition_. Then one thing led to another and I was blackmailing her, and enjoying the feeling of power it gave me. I felt so..satisfied when I felt that woman shake in fear, because of me!" I was nearly crying now and I pressed my face against my kneecaps and began banging it softly against them.

My breath came harsher and harsher as I began to bang my face harder and faster, hoping the pain would distract me from the thought of twisting someone for my benefit.

"You know," began Sasuke, "one thing led to another? That sounded like you courted that lady to her bedroom."

I snorted and broke out into ragged chuckles, "who says courted anymore?" I peeked at Sasuke between my knees and watched as he put on a highly offended face, "why the great, last Uchiha of Konoha of course. Only those that are great and noble can _court _someone."

"So when are you going to court one of those _ravishing _girls that always seem to follow you yeah?" I uncurled myself and sat up on my knees, "maybe a certain bubblegum-haired girl hmm?" Sasuke whacked me on the head as he stood up, "c'mon bitch, let's go find whatever the hell you're looking for."

I stood up and followed him out of the dark corner I had managed to tuck myself into. As we walked side by side through the bookshelves I quickly grasped his hand and smiled at him, "thanks Sasuke." I dropped his hand and turned my face away from him as we continued on.

Then I tried to ignore the tingly feeling that came from my hand or the sudden and foreign skip of my heart.

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

"What's Alice reading Sasuke-kun?" Sakura questioned the Uchiha as she stared at Alice who was reading a thick book and ignoring everyone around her. "A book on fuinjutsu," sighed Sasuke as he broodily stared off into the distance, "she's been reading it since last night and she hasn't put it down at all."

"Is that jealousy I sense?" Teased Naruto as he nudged Sasuke, "jealous of a book Teme?" He yelped as Sasuke punched him in the arm, "shut up Dobe!" The two looked up when a hand was thrust into Sasuke's face, "scroll please Blackey," demanded Alice as she still read the book.

"Why would I give you a scroll bitch?" Sasuke slapped her hand away, "I won't waste any of my equipment on something that you need. I bet it would be stupid anyway, coming from you." Alice finally looked up from her book, "what climbed up your ass and died today Sunbeam?"

Naruto began to laugh at Sasuke, "pssh, she always gets you Teme!" He began to roll around on the ground as he laughed even louder, "she's got you whipped!"

"Do you even know what that means you retard!" Shouted Sakura as she hit Naruto when he rolled too close to her. She then rummaged in her ninja pouch, "take my one of mine Alice." Alice smiled gratefully as she took the red lined scroll from Sakura's hand, "thanks Sakura!"

"If you don't mind me asking," said Sakura, "but what are you reading about Alice?" Said girl perked up, "well Hime there told you I was reading about fuinjutsu yeah?" Sakura nodded hesitantly, "yes, but that is a highly advanced level of ninja arts that only a few people can understand, let alone use." Alice hummed and thumbed through the book, "yes well I've been reading this basic fuinjutsu book, and I just finished it then so I can get started on something I think will-"

"You can't have finished that book yet!" Naruto poked at the book, "that must be at least four hundred pages and you only just got it last night 'tebayo!"

"Yes well I speed read," scoffed Alice, "and when I get into a book, I get into a book." She then tapped the cover of the book, "fuinjutsu is a use of symbols to basically write a code that changes a function of whatever you are placing it onto, it can even change the laws of physics!"

"What is physics?" Sakura scrunched her nose up, "I have never heard of such laws in the Konoha book of laws!" Alice laughed nervously, "yes I guessed you wouldn't understand, but it doesn't matter. What matters is what I have discovered about the way of writing fuinjutsu itself!"

Alice plopped down on the ground in front of Team Seven and began rifling through the pages of the book. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura waited for the girl to find whatever it was she needed, they jumped when Alice suddenly exclaimed triumphantly and slammed the book on the ground.

"See this here," Alice pointed at a swirling looking symbols that was inked into the middle of the page, "that is a balancing symbol. It is used in various occasions when you use seals, sometimes to keep the balance of the users' chakra as they push it into the seal. If it is a delicate seal, the balance symbol could be used to help control the chakra of someone with poor chakra control." She pointed at Naruto, "people with large chakra masses like Naruto would benefit from this, but! You can't have two balancing symbols on one seal since they would cancel each other out, and there isn't enough symbol dynamics to add another anyway. Though if you linked it to another parallel seal.." Alice trailed off as she used a brush dipped in ink to write something down on the scroll Sakura gave her.

"How do you know that?" Sasuke stared at the symbol that was shown in the book, "I can't tell that from here. How do you know it's a balancing seal? There isn't anything about it being one here."

"Well I read about it earlier," Alice turned her attention back to the balancing seal, "but I could tell what it was after I looked at it closely." She tapped near the centre of the seal, "this part here, look at it for me." Team Seven complied and leaned in to look at the circular centre, "I can't see anything," whined Naruto, "it's just meaningless swirls."

"Humph," Alice traced an unknown path through the swirls, "this here looks just like a symbol of the universal symbol of balance. It's a ying and yang," she showed the trio the ying and yang necklace she wore, "see!"

"I see nothing," Sasuke commented flatly as Sakura nodded in agreement, "there's nothing there Alice."

Alice growled before throwing her hands up in frustration, "whatever! The next step I realised is that symbols back in my..home land, was the primary foundation of language in the later years. What came after symbols, years after, was the written language. But that's not important, what's important is the 'language' that has been looked over for years. The concept has always been associated with magic, symbols have played a large part in magical beliefs, but not as much as spells and enchantments. Spells and enchantments though, are just a souped up version of lyrics, or poetry! Rhyming words into spells, or in this instance, into a seal like quality. If I combine symbols that I know have great importance, with basically lyrics. Oh my sweet Jashin, I have a new way of using fuinjutsu! An easier and better way of writing it! The best part is, I can write it with symbols only I know and in my home language. That means that no one can undo the seal I put up, not even a seal master!" She grinned at Team Seven, "how amazing is that?!"

"Uhhh," Naruto muttered uncertainly, "what?"

"I have no clue what you just talked about," agreed Sasuke. Alice turned hopeful eyes towards the brain of the team, but was disappointed when Sakura shook her head sadly, "I don't understand what you're talking about Alice."

Alice looked uncertain for a moment, "but it will work….I mean..it has to work! I just…" Her posture slumped, defeated, "why is nothing going right for me?"

"There, there," Naruto patted her arm nervously, "it'll be fine."

"No it won't," came Alice's muffled reply as she burrowed into her crossed arms, "I just want to go back to bed and sleep forever. Just forget I never existed as I disappear into nothingness!"

"Stop being melodramatic," Sasuke poked her in the arm, "just go try and write one or something. Just try it out and try not to explain it to us because it is confusing and I really couldn't care less." He pushed Alice towards the scroll, "go on and write with that…Where the hell did you get that brush and ink from Alice"

"Your place of course," Alice said offhandedly as she sat in front of the scroll, "it has your emblem and stuff on it."

Sure enough there was a small Uchiha fan on the end of the brush and inscribed into the glass of the inkwell. "You won't be getting it back though," commented Alice as she searched through her ninja pouch.

"Oh why's that?" Sasuke scowled at Alice as she pulled out a kunai from her pouch. "Because I'm contaminating it," Alice flinched as she sliced her right index-finger finger. "Drip, drip, drop," Alice sung quietly as blood dripped into the inkwell, "Alice is a rain woman."

"Alice is insane!" Sakura grabbed out a roll of bandages and pulled Alice's hand towards her, "why would you do that?" Alice mumbled something before frowning at the inkwell, "you think that's enough blood?"

Sakura scoffed, "well you cut your finger pretty deeply idiot, you tell me." She tied off the bandage with a flourish, "at least my medical skills have gotten better. After reading those medical books for treating your burns, I have gotten a lot better!"

"I still think you should become a Iryo-nin," Alice poked at the ink with the middle finger on her right hand, "definitely have the control for it yeah." Sakura didn't answer as she looked over Alice's arms, "I take the bandages off your right arm since the burns are healed, and you get a bandage on your finger now! Ugghh I'm just mad that I couldn't heal your left arm, there is something funky going on about that arm."

"Just learn some medical jutsus~" Alice dipped the brush into the ink, "just do it Sakura~"

"You do it then Alice!"

"I don't have good enough chakra control."

"Well get good chakra control."

"Kakashi-sensei has been working on me and my chakra for a week now and it's still too hard to control."

"Less complaining and more action."

"Just stop Sakura."

"Hah! I got last word in!"

"Whatever." Alice carefully put the brush to the paper, "It is a wonder I remembered to add chakra to the ink with all your yapping."

Sakura held her punch since Alice seemed so focused on whatever she was drawing on the paper. She watched with rapt attention as Alice carefully drew a circle, one that had a dot in the centre and a perfectly straight line coming off it to the edge of the circle. Alice then painted a small symbol of the number 'go' (five), next to the line, she then went on to write unreadable words around the circumference of the circle.

"What does that say?" Sakura pointed at the foreign lettering around the circle, "is that from your home language?" Alice nodded as she blew on the ink to dry it, "it is a simple saying that fits the purpose of this seal. It's a concealing seal that expands to a five metre radius, the point of that circle is that it indicates the radius and the five in your language to indicate the size of the radius. The lettering reads as 'hear no, see no, speak no.' Let's hope it works!" Alice smiled nervously at Sakura before beckoning Sasuke and Naruto closer, "you guys gotta be in the radius if you want to be concealed."

"I want to be invisible!" Chirped Naruto as he flung himself down next to Sakura, "hit me up!" Sasuke whacked him in the head as he walked by to stand next to Alice, "let's see your fail."

Alice ignored him and sliced her thumb, she didn't hear Sakura's groan of annoyance as she began to mould chakra. She channelled a whole heap of the stuff to her hand as she slammed her hand against the seal she had drawn out.

"ACTIVATE!"

* * *

Kakashi's eyes widened as chakra washed over him and his students-with the addition of Alice-disappeared in a cloud of white smoke. He jumped down from the tree he had hidden himself in and waited for the cloud of smoke to disperse, "that girl should've realised not to play around with fuinjutsu! It's a dangerous art when you don't know what you're doing! One night of study, one kami-damned night!"

Kakashi waited with bated breath as the large cloud of smoke disappeared and he found the group…

Gone.

* * *

**HAHAHAHA SURPRISE BITCHES! HOPE YOU HAD FUN WITH THAT FUCKED UP AND CONFUSING CHAPTER, MWAHAHAHAHA!**

**Yes well, Alice is getting mind-raped by Shingami and Sasuke has a fucking touching moment with her to reassure she is not going all evil with corruption and shit. Ironic 'cos that's what happens to him.**

**She also fucks around with fuinjutsu, cliché, but necessary for this story. No one actually explains fuinjutsu in this series! It's kind of a tool Kishimoto uses when he's too lazy to explain some bullshit that happens in the story. **

'**Oh I gotta keep Sarutobi in one place so Orochimaru can kill him. Fuinjutsu it is! And I won't explain the concept behind it either than how many seals it is (I believe it is six sealed) and what it looks like. Have fun suckers.'**

**Why Kishimoto? Why?!**

**So I have screwed around with the theory, all we really know is that there are symbols used and some sort of language wrote around in circles. I'm pretty sure it isn't Japanese or anything so I'm going to use English in a lyrical way and just write it in circles around a symbol that has a meaning or some shit like that. I'm just winging it!**

**So I'm done here, bye!**


	8. Act 1 Part 5: Damn Kakashi

**I think my writing went for a turn for the worst if the lack of responses is anything to go by. I'm very sorry about that!**

**Here's another chap though which I offer up in sacrifice.**

**Also, why do people think this story is so funny? I do try at some parts, but it is honest responses that I would normally say. I am flattered by the fact that people comment that they were laughing and looked crazy in public from their laughing. **

**You know who you are JustFabulous. **

**P.S. to JF- OMG! Your name! I have been waiting so long for this! I have this thing about describing things as fabulous and here you are! I shall love you for eternity if you keep this name!**

**On to the story!**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Holy shit to everyone who has written SasuxNaru! You just did incest! HAHAHAHA! Oh and I don't own Naruto, whatever_

**Warning: **_Language and Kakashi blowing up. Also MASSIVE ANGST_

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Kakashi swore lightly to himself as he circled the spot where his team and Alice had been. He was leery about going into the radius of the now scorched grass because he could disrupt Alice's flow of chakra and the seal might collapse in a bad way.

On the other hand, he might give her a lucky kick to the head after what she just pulled.

There was a reason why fuinjutsu wasn't used by many shinobi. Sure it was a complex and a hard to understand profession, but so many died from experimenting with seals. Even sealmasters had died from their experimenting, and Alice had one night looking over a fucking beginner book!

Normally Kakashi would report something like this to Hokage-sama, but he had just come from a meeting with him and he had told Kakashi that Danzō had expressed interest in the new foreigner. Kakashi was told that the new part of the mission concerning Alice's wellbeing included keeping her far away from Danzō. That couldn't be done if Hokage-sama was currently in a meeting with the man himself.

He sighed and decided the best thing to do would be to wait out the time period of the seal. Seals were eventually burnt out by the constant chakra being pushed through it. Or Alice might collapse from chakra exhaustion, whatever was quicker.

Kakashi flipped his book out and sat on the ground to wait, he wasn't really reading the book. Instead, he was preparing what to say to Alice since she seemed so set upon being immature and inconsiderate to her comrades.

* * *

"Are you sure this bogus thing is working?"

Alice's eyebrows twitched at Sasuke's dry comment. Twisting around to glare at the Uchiha beside her, she had to take deep breaths to push down the reoccurring anger.

"Well Kakashi-sensei **is **sitting right there and he seemed pretty annoyed, it must've worked." She stifled a snicker at the expressions that Naruto was pulling at the oblivious jounin, "he would've responded to Naruto's gestures by now."

Sasuke only grunted in agreement as he stared around with a bored expression, "so how does this thing work again bitch?"

"Alice," muttered Sakura uneasily, "you do realise fuinjutsu is very delicate and hard to control? Your chakra is connected directly into the seal and the seal relies on the chakra being supplied to it, didn't you say you hard poor chakra control?"

Alice laughed and waved her off, "nah it'll be fine Sakura. Kakashi-sensei said I had shoddy control, but control doesn't matter so much in a seal like this. It would only matter if I wished to be completely undetectable, then I would have to suppress my chakra so no one could sense it. Get it?"

She then turned to Sasuke, "if you couldn't understand me before genius," she flashed him a smug grin, "how could you understand now? Oh wise, prodigy ninja!"

"Don't be sarcastic with me," Sasuke sneered in reply as he flicked her nose.

Alice squeaked and gripped her nose, not before a glared was sent towards the Uchiha.

"Hey guys look at this!" Naruto yelled out as he continued to goof around in front of Kakashi's distracted face, "cool isn't it?"

"Watch out Naruto," warned Sakura, "the seal could stop at any minute and Kakashi-sensei could see what you were doing. You don't want a Thousand Years of Pain to your ass again, do you baka?"

Naruto chuckled nervously before grinning foxily at her, "don't worry Sakura-chan! He won't see a thing! He's reading that dumb book anyway." He turned back to making faces before suddenly stopping, "hey! What about.."

"Uh…" Alice stared at the disappearing seal on the scroll, "Naruto?"

Said blond laughed as he stuck the finger up at Kakashi, "can't see this can you Ero-sensei!"

Kakashi stared right at the genin, "oh?.."

Naruto laughed lamely, "he can see me…can't he?"

Sakura, Alice and Sasuke all nodded, "we tried to tell you…but…" They finished with a sigh, "you're an idiot!"

"As cute as that was," Kakashi suddenly loomed over them with the sound of thunder cracking in the background, "whose idea was this?"

All of Team Seven pointed at Alice who sighed, "I knew there would be consequences.."

Kakashi scowled at her suddenly deathly serious, "of course there would be! I taught you to use your chakra so you learn how to become a ninja. Isn't that what you wanted?" He cut off any of Alice's comments, "no! That was irresponsible and could've killed you and my team!"

Alice visibly dropped at this, "Kakash-"

"No!" Snapped Kakashi, "if you don't stop doing such foolish things I will personally oversee the sealing of your chakra! Being a shinobi isn't a game Alice, it's a life and death situation. So grow up and stop acting immature!"

Alice flinched at every comment that Kakashi threw at her, but at the last one, the rage that always seemed to throb under her skin boiled over.

"SHUT UP!" She screamed as she stood up. The scroll she had wrote on and the ink she had used fell off her, the ink splashing the ground. Team Seven were startled by this sudden outburst, they stood ready with weapons out at the sudden movement of Alice.

"You think I would endanger people just like that?" Alice growled at Kakashi as yellow eyes with slits in them bore into a single black one. "This thing inside of me won't let me die! Every time I'm in danger of dying it goes and saves me that jerk!"

Kakashi was staring steadily at Alice as killing intent flared from her, "you can't rely on it Alice. You don't understand what it can d-"

"The hell I can't!" The white of Alice's eyes were slowly being tinted a grey colour, "you don't have it inside of you ya dick! It whispers dark thoughts to me true, but it seems to be the only thing I can rely on in this fucking place!"

Kakashi's eyes widened slightly at this accusation, "what are you saying Alice?!"

"I'm saying," the girl ground out, "that no one seems to care much about poor, little Alice. The shopkeepers look at me distrustfully since I'm a foreigner. Oh Hokage-sama is helping me? He's too busy running a village to care about one girl. And you! You seem to find more entertainment in my struggling rather than that book sometimes. You get your team to do stupid team exercises, and I do chakra control exercises as usual. True it may help me greatly, but you could at least pretend you care about what I'm doing. Maybe if you pretended it wouldn't hurt so bad as usual…" Alice trailed off as she lowered her sad gaze to the ground.

"Alice," began Kakashi before the girl suddenly fired up again.

"Oh and how about the fact that the precious last Uchiha over there only takes care of me, not from the good of his heart, but because he has been ordered to! He does not give a flying fuck about anything in this village, least of all the wellbeing of some stupid bitch he has to take care of!"

Sasuke frowned slightly at this as Sakura and Naruto flicked their worried eyes to him quickly. "What the hell is going on Sasuke-kun?" Whispered Sakura, "Alice is talking about something inside of her? What the hell is setting her off like that?"

Neither of them noticed Naruto's hand stray to his stomach. He clenched his jumpsuit tightly as he stared at Alice, "she has something sealed into her Sasuke?" He said hoarsely. He then looked across to the apprehensive Sasuke, "Shingami. Isn't it? I thought that what happened in the old man's office was just some sort of hoax or something, but it's not. She really has a piece of Shingami in her."

Sakura let out a strangled hiss, "what the hell do you mean by that Naruto! Sasuke-kun, just tell us the truth!"

"It's not mine to tell," he said lowly as he to watched Alice scream at Kakashi, "just watch and wait Sakura. I'm sure we're all going to get answers"

Sakura nodded uncertainly but watched as Alice tore into her sensei.

"You know what else _Copy-nin_?" Sneered Alice to Kakashi, "you're so caught up in your fucking past that you're fucking up the future of your team!" She laughed scornfully, "how about that Kakashi, prepared to kill off another generation of Team Seven?"

Kakashi finally moved as he slammed Alice into a tree with a chokehold, "don't talk about things you don't know!"

Alice choked out a laugh as she looked down at Kakashi with baleful eyes, "it hurts to be alone. Doesn't it Hatake? Everyone you love has left you, you don't know what way is up or down, you can't seem to find any light in the world. They had been taken from you and it feels like it was all your fault!" She laughed again, "well feel happy you've never been abandoned before. Feel happy that you have those precious memories _and none of it was a lie!_" She roared out the last part as she flailed against Kakashi's grip.

"Shingami is taking over your mind and influencing you," said Kakashi lowly, "stop this. Or else."

"Or else what?!" Alice giggled hysterically, "I've already lost everything! What's my life and what little freedom I have left!" She grinned at Kakashi's pensive look, "oh yes, I have sensed those precious ANBU you have been shadowing me. The only time they aren't watching me is here, with _you_. So Kakashi," Alice leaned in with her yellow eyes glowing, "are you going to teach your team anything useful? Or are you going to let them slip through your fingers again?"

Kakashi dropped her and stepped away, "what the hell is wrong with you Alice?! This isn't just the Shingami, this anger doesn't come from nowhere, so what's wrong?!"

"Wrong?" Asked Alice quietly as she pushed herself up onto all fours. She looked at Kakashi with sad, emerald eyes, "my entire being Kakashi. I am tainted and wrong, I should not be alive with this thing inside of me." She slowly stood up and turned her back on Team Seven, "I just want to go home. Can't you understand this?"

Alice began to slowly trudge away from the slightly shocked team.

"Alice!" Yelled out Naruto as he began to run towards her, "Alice! Hey wait!"

"Enough Naruto," Kakashi clapped his hand down on Naruto's shoulder, "she needs to wind down. Her mentality is unbalanced with that thing in her, but I think something was already wrong before that happened."

"But sensei," Naruto's eyes stared forlornly in the direction Alice had gone, "she's like me. In a way I mean, she has something inside of her like I do." He grasped at his stomach again, "but it's worse than mine isn't it? It can take her over or something."

Kakashi merely nodded as he stared off in memory, "we all have our own demons Naruto. No one can remained untouched in a world as cruel as this."

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

"Stupid fucking Kakashi!" I kicked out at a rock as I walked away from Team Seven, "why does he have to act like he's the boss of me or something!"

_You're acting like one of those female teenagers in those movies you seem to hate._

"Shut up you," I scowled, "you didn't help when you began to possess me like that!"

_I am sorry if I react to your anger, maybe if you weren't so fractured already you might actually be able to control that temper of yours. It seems to come out viciously whenever your past is brought up or when someone seems to say something about your..capabilities._

"Why the hell are you still here?" I growled as I sat down on a rock in a secluded training ground, far away from Team Seven's!

_When I was established into your mind, I had a shaky grasp onto you. Now, I have settled into your body fairly better. The fact that I still am able to talk to you is that I have a better grasp on your mind and the simple fact that the mind is closely tied with emotions. The strongest human emotion is despair and anger, that is when it is easiest to make contact with you. Right now you're still angry and in despair, therefore I can still connect with you._

"Thanks," I said dryly as I swung my feet out in front of me, "I didn't realise death gods talked so much."

_Since my establishment in your mind I take on some of your factors and personality so your mind finds me familiar, rather than kicking me out._

"So that's why you're not so much of a creepy voice and you aren't so uptight."

_That may be the truth in your case, I am just correcting myself to your mentality. Which in fact, is rather fragile. I do get your memories chosen, and I can not seem to see the point in which your mind fractured._

"Uh maybe when you shoved yourself into me!" I yelled out, I picked myself up and walked over to the stump in the middle of the field, "I am so angry!"

_I could sense that, why else would I still be able to talk to you?_

"Shut up and go away!" I slammed my fist against the stump and ignored the pain, "why doesn't anything go right for me?!" I punched the stump over and over until my hands began to bled, "why'd you have to do this to me?..."

_This world is unbalanced, you have seen what darkness lies ahead. I may be the god of death, but my job is also to keep balance over this world. I am here to make sure that you do your job and fix it, now stop your crying, I do not understand why you humans are so fragile._

I blinked away the blurriness in my eyes that I hadn't realised was there, "if you believe in balance so much, why do you keep trying to corrupt me? You keep saying to embrace the darkness and all that shit. How is that balanced?!"

_For all the badness that has happened to you, you still smile. Everyone has always thought you were so happy, you had even managed to convince yourself. But in here, in your mind, darkness is festering. All those times you felt like you were so angry you were going to kill someone, when you felt betrayed and hurt, when everything bad happened to you, all you did was smile. I believe that is when your mind began to fracture, lying to others is one thing, but lying to yourself is impossible._

I moved from punches onto kicks, my sandals slapped solidly against the wood with a soothing rhythm. "That's nice and all, but what does it have to do with you being creepy and whispering shit to me?"

_When I entered you, I was instantly pushed back into the very depths of your mind by your subconscious defence. I slowly began to override your subconsciousness until I became it, but your subconscious for all its help, is a very dark thing. You could push away all that badness with a smile or a blank look, but your subconscious still whispered violent and somewhat dark thoughts to you. I have simply made those thoughts heard, you are good on the outside and on the surface, therefore to keep the balance, you must have an equal amount of darkness. And if you won't show it on the outside, you must show it on the inside._

I sighed and rested my head against the wood, "so I'm crazy now."

_Crazy is a matter of perspective, but yes, I think your mind is fracturing into insanity._

"Happy times."

I tried not to notice the dripping of tears mixing in with the pools of red on the ground. "So what now? Shingami-sama?"

_Now? Now you fix it._

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Alice didn't know how long she had been punching the lone stump, but her hands had nearly formed new harden skin underneath the bloody one that took the blunt trauma.

Punching the stump as hard as she could, she could hear her knuckles creak in discomfort. She snorted slightly and flicked the blood off her hands as she went to lie down on the grass. It was nearing noon as she lay back on a soft patch of grass, over four hours since she had first started venting her anger out on the stump.

Stretching her hands out in front, Alice winced slightly at the pain that raced through them. While in anger, she obviously didn't think things through too much, but at least she had gotten better at those taijutsu stances Sasuke-teme had shown her.

"Quite a show you put on gaki."

"Holy shit!" Alice grasped her heart as she sat up. "Who the fuck said that?!" She then laughed lightly, "nah I could sense you before, nice try on sneaking up on me. Biatch."

"Oh? And a mouth on her too. Kakashi seems to find the most interesting brats washed up in the strangest of places. You're the foreigner I've heard so much about then, and I see you've got anger issues that need to be vented. Do you wish to play?"

The voice had seemed to drift and echo around Alice, but the last statement was whispered right beside her ear.

"So you're the Mitarashi Anko I've heard so much about." Alice grinned as she turned and faced the smirking face of Anko, "I think we might have some…common areas in our lives. Take for example, I love to beat the shit out of people, and apparently you do to. I have also heard that you have a great fondness for dango. There's a sad fact that I have never had dango," she ignored the horrified gasp that came from Anko, "and I've stolen some money from my duck-ass Uchiha. So what you say we hit your favourite dango place and you can introduce me to that lovely dish, hmm?"

"You had me at dango," Anko grabbed the girl by the collar and began to drag her away. "Nice choice of clothing there girly, but it could do with some mesh and a bit more cleavage."

Alice nodded, "I was thinking that too, but I quite like the bandages on my left arm. It somewhat makes me look like a badass. Not as much as you though," she said quickly, "I can see you've got a real kunoichi talent. Nee-san."

Anko barked out a laugh and propped Alice upright as they walked into the streets of Konoha, "a flatterer too? Where have you been all my life," a shit-eating grin spread over her face, "imōto?"

"I've always wanted to be a little sister to a fabulously, sexy woman who can handle a man properly."

"And what do you propose is the correct way to handle a man?" Anko asked as she led Alice under the flaps of a booth and ordered several plates of dango. She glanced back at Alice as she made her way over to her usual both with said girl trailing behind her.

"By the balls of course," Alice quipped an eyebrow at the purple-haired kunoichi as they slid into the booth, "what other way are you to handle such a creature?"

Anko roared with laughter, "I'm definitely thinking I'm going to like you girl. What's your name anyway foreigner?"

"Clostar Alice," she replied easily as she propped her chin up. Alice then let a smirk wander across her face, "what if I made an offer to you?"

"Depends what it is," Anko said casually, "depends whether it amuses me or not."

"How about you get to torture me whenever you want to and we can both call it training. I wish to be trained properly, not the pussyfooting Hatake always seems to do."

Anko smirked at that, "train you huh? Well," she cracked her knuckles with a leer, "I've always wanted a punching bag. Or even someone to try my poisons against."

"Poison immunity does sound pretty good," mused Alice. She stuck out her hand, "Show me seduction tricks and we have a deal!"

"Seduction?" Anko asked incredulously as she flicked the hand away, "for a delicate, little thing like you? Are you sure girly?"

Alice nodded determinedly, "I'm fucking positive. I am only just getting used to using chakra now and my control is a little off, but!" She steepled her fingers, "I'm sure that my talent will come in handy once I learn the henge."

"What are you talking about girly? What talent do you have that will go with a henge?" Anko frowned at the girl, "henge's aren't really used on the field unless you're going to disguise a kawarimi or something."

"Yes well," began Alice, "I'm not choosing to go onto the field." At Anko's sign she exaggerated, "I'm wishing to do more along the intelligence gathering and assassinations line of work. I can mimic a lot of people's voices and if I get a full report on someone and their quirks…"

"Combine that with a henge," breathed Anko, "holy shit! Do you know what this means!"

"Perfect infiltration," smirked Alice, "and if I have seduction techniques on my side, I can gather the information on the person myself. Some alcohol here, a flash there, and shazzam! Information for me and Konoha. So what do you say Anko-nee?" She stuck her hand out again, "we've got ourselves a deal"

A larger hand grasped hers firmly, "you've got yourself a deal…Alice-chan."

* * *

Sarutobi sighed as he stared into his crystal ball at the two grasping hands. "Alice-chan, I hope you realise what you're getting into. I certainly don't!"

* * *

**And done.**

**A bit short, but such drama! *Le gasp***

**So Alice has a pissy moment after Kakashi's pissy moment. She can talk to Shingami and they seem on better terms this time. She vents her anger on a stump. And she's going to be a mini-Anko in the poison, assassination and most importantly!**

**Da, da, da~ SEDUCTION! YAY!**

**I'm so excited to write what sort of crap Alice gets up to, although before then, she has been missing the whole day….How are the others going to react?**

**Just think over that till next time!**


	9. Act 1 Part 6: Wow That's some angst

**So Mimic shall now be my main focus. That means…MORE MIMIC IF YOU WANT!**

**That is, only if you want. 'Cause I've got another story I should probably get going…Hmmm we'll see.**

**I got another fabulous review from JustFabulous and it just made my day! So this chapter is dedicated to them 'cause they made me even more enthusiastic to write this rubbish!**

**Also, I've seem to have some people ask if Alice is going to be with Sasuke. Yes and no. Sasuke is a little shit who loves no one but himself, Alice really does not want any type of a man in her life either than friends and mentors. As well as the fact Alice is two years older than Sasuke. But there will be a point where it may get serious, until then, there will be some stupid, funny embarrassing *hurl* fluff moments.**

**Ew.**

**Here's some angst for you!**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_I don't own Naruto, DUH!_

**Warning: **_SASUKE-MAD-ALICE=DISASTER!_

* * *

**Anko P.O.V (WHAT?!)**

I let a small, satisfied smirk creep onto my face as I watched my new 'imōto' exit the booth. Damn that girl, I actually do wish I had met her little ass earlier. Imagine what fun we could've had…terrorising the village.

Ha! I caught you out you dirty minded brats! As if I wanted to have her in my bed, I'll have to show her some tricks before she touches the Ever Sexy Mitarashi Anko!

But back on track.

My head was slightly reeling at what the implications of that girls' enrolment into the ninja corps could bring. She had demonstrated her ability to really mimic people, she had my sexy voice down pat! But if she could learn the henge, some seductive techniques, tactics and some of my awesome assassination skills…I might have an apprentice on my hands here…a damn good one at that!

Up your little Uchiha bitch Hatake! I've got a perfect kunoichi I can mould out of this girl, and you went and threw her away!

I cackled slightly as I played with the dango skewer I had finished off. Of course no one really paid attention to my actions, they were used to it now. I fiddled with the skewer as I thought about what to do next.

The girl seemed anxious to start training, I'll let her deuce it out with the Uchiha bitch and then we'll have a fun training session tonight. Yep, I'll stock up on snakes in my sleeves and grab that whip I knew I had lying around somewhere…

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

I ruffled my hair in slight exasperation as I walked down the sunset lit streets. That was a big gamble bringing in Anko to this plan I had, but I didn't really know many jounins that didn't already have genin teams. The only person I think may be available is Genma and I have no way to contact him. Anko may be unpredictable, but I knew her personality. Knowing is good, knowing is safe. Anko was definitely safe, as long as she didn't kill me with some outrageous training procedure.

Taking a deep breath I slowed my walk down, taking a moment to stop, and actually look around Konoha.

The streets were full of mainly couple going on a date, it seemed Friday night was the romantic night. The lanterns in the shops were being lit and they cast a warm glow as the sun began to set and darkness fell. I drifted as the smell of cooking did, I didn't know where to go now, but I was calmer about it now. If Sasuke threw a hissy fit over my hissy fit, I may have to go to Hokage-sama for an orphan salary.

Oh…I was an orphan now basically.

I blinked rapidly as I felt the usual flush from oncoming tears, I _did not _want to cry in public!

I made my way over to an alley connecting onto the street I was in. The buildings weren't too tall and I reckon I could make it this time 'round.

Closing my eyes I applied chakra to my feet and stuck my foot against the wall.

'Calm mind, calm body, calm chakra.' I hummed the mantra as I prepared to walk up the wall. Keeping a calm mind would get me up this wall, luckily I was tired and that meant being brain dead was easier.

I switched off all thought and only focused on the strong thrum of my chakra as I began to walk up the wall. I didn't open my eyes and I didn't get distracted.

I was still surprised when I made it to the top.

I heaved out the breath I had been holding and carefully made my way to the edge of the building. It was dangerous but I swung my legs over the edge and sat down. The sun was just setting, my favourite time of the day. Only this time, instead of it setting over the ocean, it was setting over the outline of buildings and trees.

Don't get me wrong, it was a beautiful sight, but I would give anything to see a grain of sand or some salt water to show I'm back home. Most of all, I wanted my brother.

Many siblings hated their siblings and always fought with them. My brother and I always fought, but we mock fought for fun, and I always loved it. Out of anyone in my family, my brother was the most important to me. We shared secrets, thoughts, dreams, even this anime together.

I blinked away the tears that began to prick at my eyes and curled my knees up to my chest. I wrapped my arms around my legs and hugged them as close as I could to me, a weak way of faking that someone was hugging me.

I began to softly sing to myself as I watched the last orange rays of light slowly disappear. It was aimless lyrics that I came up with on the spot, but it always made me feel better. This time it didn't work, the dam finally broke and tears began to streak down my face. I stopped my singing and shoved my face into my knees, blocking out everything.

"THERE YOU ARE!"

I didn't flinch at the presence I had felt before, it had become very familiar to me, but this time there was a bubbling feeling of despairing and annoyance directed at them.

"What do you want Naruto?" I muttered as I pulled up my head and stared back out into the now darkness of the night. **(A/N: Real poetic there) **

I did nothing even as an obviously enraged Naruto advanced towards me. "What do you want?!" He asked incredulously, he was now right behind me. "Are you joking Alice?! Kakashi-sensei, Sakura-chan and Sasuke have been freaking out looking for you!"

I let out a strangled laugh, "that's cute. Either than Sakura, none of them have especially cared properly for me. Sakura has been making sure that I've got clothing, keeping me company and showing me around Konoha. What has Sasuke done? Given me a place to live, but! He leaves me downstairs on a couch with a blanket in the cold. He occasionally supplies me food, expecting me to somehow come up with money to feed myself. Also, you should've realised by now that Kakashi isn't training you, he's simply giving you team exercises and reading that porn of his. All I've seen is your taijutsu improve barely because I get you guys involved in spars since Kakashi is too fucked up to actually come on time."

Naruto's hand grasped my shoulder tightly, "stop talking like that Alice! Sure Sasuke is a teme, but he's been actually nice to you after all he's been through. I know his family was killed off by his brother and he was nice enough to let you live in his house with all those bad memories floating around. And Kakashi-sensei! I don't know what happened, but he's really sad inside and he tries so hard to help our team, and-" He hesitated slightly before pulling me around to face him.

I smiled thinly at his slightly startled expression. Licking the still dripping tears off my lip I said quietly, "and what about you Naruto?"

At his confused expression I continued, "what about Uzumaki Naruto. He lives alone and struggles every day for acknowledgement since the citizens here are so stupid to mistake you for your tenant." I poked him lightly in the stomach, "what does Uzumaki Naruto get?"

"A-alice…" Naruto looked unsure for the first time I met him, vulnerable even. His cerulean eyes looked shiftily at me, "how'd you know?" He managed to croak out, "wh-what do you-"

"I think nothing of it," I soothed. Wiping away my tears I grasped Naruto's hand gently before tugging him down to sit next to me. We sat there quietly as we looked over Konoha, both of us had been dealt a sucky hand of fate. Naruto three times more though.

Here I was crying about not being able to see my family when Naruto never had one. How childishly selfish of me.

I hesitantly put my arm around Naruto's shoulder, wincing when he stiffened. I waited for him to relax slightly before asking the big question, "you're the jailor of the Kyūbi aren't you?"

Naruto instantly stiffened before twisting in my arm to face me, "how did yo-"

"I know a lot of things Naruto," I smiled slightly at him, "some things I shouldn't know. And a whole lot of things I'm going to change." He looked confused by my comments but he relaxed even more when I began to run my hands through his soft hair.

"You have Shingami don't you?" He asked hesitantly, "the death god isn't he?" I hummed slightly in agreement, "yeah I do. He's not too bad except for when he tries to corrupt me into killing people and shit. So yeah, either than that he's pretty cool."

Naruto stared at me, "you seem so casual about that. When I hear the fox talk to me, it's scary and I don't like it at all. How do you stay so calm?"

Chuckling dryly I answered as he leant against my shoulder, "who said I was calm? I'm always scared no matter how much I pretend I'm not, but that's just part of being human." I laughed again, "not like I think being human is that great. Shingami is simply expecting me to do something big, and I'm not sure if I can do it. But if I do, it'll fix so many things and save so many different lives. If you're scared," I nudged shoulders with Naruto, "sometimes showing weakness isn't that bad. It's one of the things that make us human, and you're as human as anybody else Naruto."

I ignored the slight shaking of Naruto and continued to run my fingers through his hair. When I felt the tears begin to fall harder, I slowly pushed him into my arms. He didn't stiffen this time though and actually turned and clung to me as he cried harder.

How could I be so selfish when there was so many people in this world that were crying on the inside or crying alone. I gazed down at the blond mop of hair latched around my waist and positioned him so he was comfortably hugging my front. For being twelve Naruto was still short, it felt like I was comforting a ten year old, but one who had just realised his parents were never coming home.

I stared back out at Konoha as I stroked the village's jinchūrriki's head. Small things like this were all it took. Small things would hopefully bring this world to a better future.

The beginning of a plan continued to bloom in my head, I was just one girl. Would I….Could I do this? I flashed my gaze towards the kid in my arms and my resolve steeled.

Would I have it any other way?

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V**

Contrary to many beliefs, Sasuke did have a heart and emotions. He did occasionally get flustered, he did feel sadness, anger, happiness like others. It was just that he felt more anger and sadness than any other person, not that he didn't hide them well behind a stoic mask.

But this was the first time in ages he had felt anything near to panic.

He had stayed quiet when Alice had a spit with Kakashi. He had stayed silent when she had accused him. He had stayed silent when she had stormed off. But he couldn't stay silent when she had disappeared to Kami-knows-where and didn't come back, even when it was nearly five in the afternoon.

It was night now and Naruto and Sasuke was scouring the village for her. Sakura had to leave at one point because her parents wanted her home, but he and Naruto had continued to search for the girl.

Sasuke didn't know why Naruto seemed so _enthusiastic _to find Alice. Sure the two had become somewhat friends, they certainly acted a lot alike, but Naruto had been increasingly anxious to find the brunette. Something about today had changed Naruto's opinion about Alice.

And Sasuke wasn't sure he liked it.

Now he was tired, hungry and somewhat fed-up. Turning around he decided to head home, Alice did have nowhere else to go.

Sasuke chose to ignore the slightly panicky feeling in his chest and continued to walk through his district to his house. The door was unlocked as usual and he slid it open, not announcing his presence because..there was no one to answer.

Making his way through the hallway entrance, he finally noticed something. There was a smell in the air. It almost like…homemade cooking.

Sasuke could in fact cook for himself, he just chose not to because he had to be spending more time getting stronger so he could kill _that man_.

Yes there's italics, that's how serious he is about killing Itachi. Sasuke's a bit weird in that sense.

Sasuke shifted a kunai into his hand as he slowly crept closer to the brightly lit kitchen. He pressed himself against the wall and slowly inched towards the open doorway and-

"Stop fucking around Sasuke."

Sasuke started slightly, but coolly walked into the kitchen flipping the kunai to see Alice bustling around the kitchen and making some sort of meal. Sasuke made his way over to a saucepan that was bubbling on the stovetop and looked inside to see a reddish sauce overing the last of his mince.

"You can cook?" Sasuke asked quietly as he opened the lid of another saucepan to see spaghetti being cooked there.

"Yeah," Alice flung a pile of herbs into the mince and stirred, "it's surprising isn't it? I've picked up some dishes from my parents and this just happens to be one of my favourites." She dipped a finger into the sauce and licked it, "hm. Not quite like my mum's, but good enough."

Sasuke leant against the wall as he observed Alice set out the table with only slight hesitance. She fiddled around with the cupboards for a moment until Sasuke took pity on her, "cups are in the bottom right cupboard."

"Thanks."

Alice was definitely quieter than before, she also seemed to be bordering on a somewhat sad quiet. But as she maneuverer the kitchen with a grace she normal didn't possess, Sasuke had to admit she looked different. The calm sad look on her face softened her usually tense features and she seemed to dance as she twisted from getting another plate to checking on the mince.

Sasuke was roused from his observations when Alice stepped back with a flourish and proudly declared the meal was ready. Two plates sat opposite each other on the tiny meal table, both heaped with pasta and the mince with red sauce on top. Glasses of water sat next to them as Alice pulled a chair out and sat down.

"Are you coming?" A faint smile was on Alice's face as she watched Sasuke slowly make his way to his seat. When both of them were seated and had said the usual meal grace, there was a tense silence. The only sounds were of the utensils scraping their plates as they ate.

Halfway through the meal Sasuke had definitely had enough, "where were you?"

Alice slowed down her eating and slowly twirled a piece of pasta on her fork. "Does it especially matter?"

"Yes it does Alice!" Sasuke snarled at the now stoic girl, "you left for hours! None of us had a clue where you went and Kakashi just told us to leave you alone. He went off to Kami-knows-where.." Sasuke muttered sullenly at the last part but fired up almost as quickly, "Naruto, Sakura and I went searching for you and I find you just cooking here like nothing's happened!"

"I know," Alice placed her fork down, "I know you guys were looking for me. I met Naruto around sunset and we chatted for a while-"

"Oh so you chatted," scoffed Sasuke, "what about? Your _feelings_? How cute, how disgusting, how typical," he sneered at the end. "People like yo-"

"People like me disgust you, hm?" Life was finally coming to Alice's face, but it was a look of anger, something Sasuke quickly rose to the bait of.

"People like you sicken me," Sasuke glared at her across the table, "pissing about the sucky life you have. How about me? I've had my whole family massacred and-"

"Be happy they weren't massacred in front of you," Alice said softly, "be happy you didn't have to watch their blood spill." She was getting riled up again, "be happy that you didn't have their blood splash across you as they were cut down!"

Sasuke made an odd choking noise before responding angrily, "like you would know!"

"No," Alice softened slightly, "I don't know what it is like to lose a family member. The closest thing I can feel to that is the fact my aunt is currently dying back home, with no one but her kids. She's had a hard life, but she always smiled the brightest and I admire her for that." Alice stared at Sasuke, "I _do _know what it's like to be lied to, betrayed, angry at the person or people who would do that to you."

Sasuke glowered at her, "what the hell do you mean by that?"

Alice sighed before going back to her meal, "I'm not getting into a fight over this Sasuke. Yes I was selfish in my despair, but so are you. You are caught up in your past like Kakashi, so much that both of you can't seem to see the person that holds the most pain in your team."

She picked her plate up and continued to clear Sasuke's away, "you should know something. Some words of wisdom that I've heard back home, a truthful quote. The loneliest people are the kindest. The most damaged people are the wisest." She gave him a bright grin, "and the saddest people smile the brightest."

Sasuke stared after Alice as she retreated into the living room after clearing up. What she had said then, she had smiled and…All the smiles of hers, they were all so bright and big compared to the soft ones he had sometimes seen on her face. They were so much like…like Naruto.

_You are caught up in your past like Kakashi, so much that both of you can't seem to see the person that holds the most pain in your team._

Maybe the dobe was deeper than he had thought, and maybe he went after Alice because he felt close to her for some reason. Sasuke's eyes narrowed slightly, there was something about Naruto. And now he was curious about it.

* * *

Alice made a snuffling noise as she huddled deeper into the thin blanket Sasuke had given her. The shadow near the window froze slightly before realising she was still asleep. Anko easily picked the lock on the window and slid it open without a sound.

It was going well as usual, except for the fact Anko forgot Alice always seemed to sense anyone who was near her. Anko grinned as she reached out with a rag in one hand, only to be startled as Alice whipped a hand towards her face in a jab.

Of course Anko easily avoided it, but it still surprised her slightly.

Alice didn't make a noise even as Anko pressed the soaked rag to her face. Alice glared at Anko stubbornly and held her breath, no way was she going to breathe in chloroform! Alice should've expected Anko to do something about this, it was Anko after all.

Anko admired the girls stubbornness and awareness, but she apposing _Anko_! And that did not roll with the jōnin.

A swift punch to the gut had Alice gasp for air, '_something to work on'_ mused Anko as she picked the girl up and put Alice over her shoulder in a fireman's carry. Anko began to whistle a light tune as she made her escape, it was a weirdly jaunty tune for Alice's march towards death.

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

I woke up with a groan and a pounding headache that seemed to spike behind my eyes every time I blinked. I should've realised this would've happened, Anko wasn't well known for her patience, but still.

Fuck.

I noticed it was still dark, but that also might be because of the bag over my head. Cliché, but it was also insanely itchy, maybe it was a torture method?

"Welcome girly to your hell."

I rolled my eyes behind the bag, "that's too cliché Anko-nee. Get something with some oomph! Nothing cliché, but it has to be threatening."

"You have a point there brat, but you interrupted me." A punch slammed into my gut again leaving me short of breath, "there's your oomph brat!" I nodded weakly at that, "g-good ret-tort."

"Thanks," Anko replied smugly, "but we're not here to talk about my amazingness. As much as I'm sure that would entertain us both…"

I did not like that trailing off comment, I knew something bad would come from that.

A short cough brought my attention back to Anko. "Brat, you said you want to become an amazing ninja and all that magical shit. Well first you've gotta know something about being a ninja. As much as you might hate it, ninjas gotta have both physical and mental training. So if you don't like learning, you won't like our night lessons."

"I expect we'll be doing this every night?" I asked dryly.

"You betcha!"

"What's first then sensei?"

"Well student-of-mine, we'll begin with my favourite part of being a ninja either than the killing. Or the assassinations. Or the awesome jutsus you can do. Or the fact that getting laid is so easy. I mean-"

"Don't need any more until a later time sensei."

"Yep okay! We'll be learning the basics about poison tonight. I teach you the properties of a plant, then I'll beat the information into you if you get it wrong!"

"Yay." I bet she could feel the amount of sheer excitement for this lesson. Sure I would like to learn about poisons, the beating? Not so much. But if it is good for me then I'll take it without complaining. Actually, just not too much complaining.

"First thing you need to know brat," I heard a rattling sound coming from where Anko's voice was, "you need your basic instruments. Mortal and pestle are mostly used for grounding up poisons, so don't use it in your cooking 'kay? Another point there, most poisons are from plants around you. The most powerful poisons come in the raw form of plants like Hemlock and Aconite, but there are less obvious ones that work better."

I felt a leafy thing being thrust into my hands, hands which were bound in front of me might I add. I carefully felt along the plant, thick stems with slightly spiky leaves near the top. I could also feel bunches of small flowers at the top, completely harmless right?

"That's the dreaded Hemlock brat," Anko seemed to say it proudly, "describe it for me will you?"

I did as she said but I couldn't help but wonder, "what colour are the flowers though sensei? And do they always look like this? Where are they found and what are the properties?"

Anko chuckled in front of me, "good questions there. You might not be entirely useless here." I ignored the comment as Anko took the plant from me, "the Hemlock is a flowering plant also known as the Conium. The flowers are white and occasionally have a light purple tinge to them. They're found in more drier and areas, but they have been known to pop up in the strangest of places. The Hemlock literally slows your mind down until it's a mushy vegetable ready to be smushed. Eventually the brain slows down so much all the organs and body functions begin to fail. Most of the deaths are caused by suffocation because the respiratory system went and died, but the best part is that it causes paralysis!"

She sound way to gleeful when she told me that but I couldn't help but feel excited as well, I had always wanted to learn about poisons. Of course though, it's illegal to use poison back home. Apparently people don't like it when you fiddle around with toxic stuff.

Stupid laws.

Anko interrupted my thoughts when she rapped smartly on my head, "repeat that back for me will you brat. Any mistakes and I get to be forceful with you, a punch here, a cut there, maybe a lashing…."

That totally didn't make me nervous but I recited the information Anko had told me perfectly. "How long do the night classes go for sensei?" I asked Anko, "we talking an all-nighter or what?"

"Nah," scoffed Anko, "just till you learn what I reckon is the top ten poisonous plants, from touch and smell. Then you need to recite the information on them and what poisons they make, by themselves and with others from my ten."

I held back the groan that threatened to escape my mouth, just great.

Real fucking great.

* * *

**Well that wasn't especially exciting or funny, but it's going somewhere. **

**Alice is crying, firing up, comforting, understanding, happy and irritated. Sounds like she's having her time.**

**Sasuke is busy being an emo, angst-ridden twat.**

**Naruto is confused and sad.**

**Anko is enjoying herself.**

**And Sakura and Kakashi didn't make an appearance.**

**Hope to see you guys soon!**


	10. Act 1 Part 7: Make ups

**Hi y'all!**

**I've only got…six more days of school holidays. Sounds like a lot right? Enough to get you a few chapters here and there no?**

**Yeah well, don't get your hopes up!**

**I do happen to have a social life, and family life will take up majority of those days. Add three tests of studying and this may be the last chapter for the hols + a week. School will definitely be chock-a-block!**

**On a note of the last chap, that scene between Naruto and Alice was originally not going to happen. I began to write Sasuke and get primed up for a HUGE argument when I realised that Alice wasn't really in the mood. She had already screamed and yelled. Put on a brave face and convinced Anko to be her sensei. And just cried about her family.**

**If I was her, fuck Sasuke's argument. I want some chocolate and hugs, not a scrawny, duck-ass twat to start screaming at me.**

**So for the sake of Sasuke staying a man, it was Naruto.**

**That was just to clear up any confusion or any of that shit. Now that I've blabbed on, here's a new chapter.**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_DDOOON'TTT OOWWWWWNNNNN!_

**Warning: **_Language fuckrats_

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

"Dear Kami Alice! You look like the dead!"

I managed a convenient zombie-like moan as I wandered into the training ground. I'd shuffled all through town to get here and I was still tired, normally moving woke me up.

"What happened to Alice!"

I winced at Naruto's piercing shout as I thunked my forehead against the tree trunk Team Seven was sitting under. "Cool your jets Naruto, I'm just tired. Now will you please be quiet?"

I heard an amused noise come from Sakura, "tired Alice is polite Alice."

I managed to roll my eyes before slowly sinking to the ground and curling up in a ball. "Can't I go back home?"

Sakura laughed, "you just got here and it's nine in the morning. Why are you so tired?"

I choked out a laugh, "you would be tired if you nearly stayed up all night." I sighed and tucked my head in further, "I shouldn't have slept at all. I function better when I get no sleep rather than just two hours. Screw Anko-nee right now."

The rest of my woeful tirade was smothered by Naruto lying over me, "I'll give you my energy Alice! It'll make you feel better!" I laughed again and rolled over so I could see Naruto lying across me. I pulled him towards me and hugged him to me like a teddy bear, "I'll get up after I grab some sleep with my teddy."

Naruto struggled under my arms and tried to wriggle out, "hey let me out! I don't want to be a stupid bear!"

"Shhh," I closed my eyes and hugged him tighter, "teddies don't talk."

A poke in the side made me crack open an eye. Sakura was standing over me with a slight smile on her face, "c'mon Alice. Let the poor kid up."

I stubbornly held Naruto tighter, "no he's mine! You can't take him from me meanie!" Sakura scowled slightly and grabbed Naruto's only free arm, "Alice…" She tugged on Naruto's arm to get him out, "let him go Alice."

"No." I quickly grabbed Sakura and dragged her down so that she was squished against Naruto in my arms, "yay! More teddies!"

Try as she might, Sakura couldn't get out of my grip. Both her and Naruto were _very _close and personal with each other, not that I ship them. I'm NaruHina all the way. I'm just trying to share some love between them and all that magic.

I'm also trying to get some sleep.

Stupid Anko….

It was close to three in the morning by the time I had memorised the top ten natural poison plants and their properties. Six when I had successfully made Hemlock into a sort of paste that could be ingested by someone. The cool part was that the paste killed in five minutes. Anko had demonstrated on a rat she had captured earlier. She had wanted to use a person, but they currently had no one in the I&T holding cell to be killed. The rat had eaten the paste-really Anko force-fed it-and around the four minute mark it keeled over paralysed. I got to watch as the body functions of the rat failed, it took thirty seconds for the rat to die after its respiratory system died.

It was awesome.

I snuggled into Sakura's soft hair and slowly drifted off into a light doze. I didn't even bother to wake up when the dipshit I was arguing with last night entered the training ground. How did I know Sasuke was there? That was easy enough to explain, chakra sensing.

It had become apparent to me after only a few days of having chakra. A lot of things made me able to sense people's presence and their chakra, the fact that I had chakra played a part.

I had always been alerted to people's presence just before they came anywhere near me, a sixth sense you would call it. I always woke up minutes before my alarm, or I woke up a second before my parents opened the door to check on me or whatever.

And yes, I was awake when Sasuke put that blanket on me on the first night. As if I was going to say anything about that, it's better if he thought I was asleep. It was also better if I pretended he had no heart, it made ignoring him easier. Like I was currently doing.

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Sasuke had barely any sleep last night, but he was feeling slightly better than last night. He had spent a lot of last night brood-_thinking _over what Alice had said to him and what she could mean by her words. She had said Naruto was the person with the most pain on the team, Sasuke found it hard to believe the Dobe had the worst pain.

Naruto may have lost his parents, but it wasn't like he had _actually _lost his parents. They were gone before he could even get to know them, therefore he had never lost them in the first place.

The only thing he had noted about Naruto was that the population of Konoha seemed to glare at him as he walked through town. Sasuke had noticed it when they were walking to Hokage's office or when they were doing a mission, but he just brushed it aside. Maybe there was something about that, something to do with Dobe.

Sasuke would have to ponder it later because he had arrived at his team's training ground. He also arrived to see a strange sight.

Naruto and Sakura were squished together, something that Sakura wouldn't willingly let happen. They were also tucked under…Alice's arms as she held them in a bear hug. Alice's eyes were closed and it looked like she was asleep, which was preposterous, the noise his teammates were making could wake the dead.

"Sasuke!"

"Sasuke-kun!"

Sasuke internally groaned at his teammates pleading looks and shouts, this was not going to end well. He could just feel it.

"Come help us Teme," Naruto made puppy eyes at Sasuke, "Alice thinks we're her teddy bears. She won't let us up until she gets enough sleep or something! She was muttering about only getting two hours sleep, what did you do to her last night?!"

Sakura gave Sasuke a disapproving look, "it's not healthy for someone to get such little sleep Sasuke-kun. What did you do to keep her up so late? And who's Anko?"

"I thought you weren't being a medic," Alice mumbled as she shoved her head between Sakura's and Naruto's. "Change your mind did you Sakura-_chan_?"

Sakura growled and blushed at the same time. "I-I just read up on some more medical books Alice! It doesn't mean I'm going to be an Iryo-nin or anything!" Alice made a disbelieving noise and curled up tighter. Sakura wiggled slightly under Alice's increased grip, "and what's with the chan part?!"

Sakura could feel Inner get fired up inside her, **'DON'T YOU GET AFFECTIONATE LIKE NARUTO-BAKA! DON'T BELITTLE US LIKE A LITTLE GIRL, CHA!'**

Alice's mouth tweaked in a small grin, "mmmmn. You're just like what I imagined my little sister would be like. Fiery like me, but good at medical stuff like my mum."

A blush bloomed across Sakura's face, "like a lit-ttle sister?"

Alice's eyelid slid up and she stared at Sakura with her emerald eye, "not unless you don't want to be." Shaking her head vigorously, Sakura smiled at Alice, "no! I've always wanted a sibling!"

"Well it's unfortunate you've got one like me," Alice smirked, "or you could be lucky. I'm the little sister to my brother, how could I know what it's like to be the older sibling."

"Ne, ne!" Naruto beamed at Alice, "you have a sibling?!"

Alice rolled her open eye before releasing Sakura and Naruto. Sitting up she stretched and cracked her back, "yeah I've got an older brother. He's my favourite person the whole world, and he's the coolest bro ever!"

Sasuke scoffed as he leant against the tree the others were under, "what's so amazing about him? He's probably just as stupid as you are, and twice as ugly."

"I go to a smart school dumbass~" Sung Alice, "my brother is just as smart as I am. He's only a year older than me but he's skipped a year in school. Oh also, the girls at his school pine after him. He doesn't have fangirls, he has girls who reckon he's hot and awesome, and they don't stalk him. Therefore he's twice as cool as any Uchiha could be, especially you." She made a scoffing noise and crossed her arms, "you're jealous of my bro's mad skills."

Sasuke looked on bewildered, Alice was colder sounding to him and she hadn't made any eye contact with him either. She was giving _Sasuke _the silent treatment. It was the other way around! He ground his teeth quietly as Naruto asked Alice another question about her _amazing brother._

"So what's he like Alice?!" Naruto cocked his head in curiosity, "is he an insane ninja who knows really strong jutsus?! Oh I bet he's the best warrior of your village! C'mon Alice! Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!"

"Okay!" Alice shoved Naruto's puppy eyes away from her face, "I would be happy to." She sat down cross-legged and faced a curious Sakura and Naruto, her back to Sasuke. "Where should I begin….Hm well firstly, he's not a ninja. Where I come from we don't have ninjas. Or even chakra for that matter."

"No chakra!" Sakura gasped, "but how are people still alive then?! How are you able to do jutsus then?!"

"My mum answers questions similar to that first one," Alice smiled softly, "but she's never found any evidence of any sort of energy inside of us."

"What's your mum do to ask those questions?" Sakura asked, "you said she's good at medical stuff."

Alice looked thoughtful for a moment, "it's hard to explain. She's a scientist who specialises in Biology, but she also dabbles in Physics for her job. She specialises in Neurobiology but also is adept at other areas of science. As a part of Biology, she knows a whole heap about the human body and what it can do, along with several diseases and how to treat them." Alice stared at Sakura suspiciously, "I thought you were asking me about my brother and not my mum. Hmm Sakura-chan?"

Sakura blushed slightly, "sorry!"

Alice just laughed again, "nah it's cool. My bro is someone I love, but I'm also insanely jealous of. He's good looking, smart and the bloody best at sport. Like fucking hell I'm so inadequate compared to him."

"You don't seem sad when you say that," commented Sasuke, "you say you're jealous. So why aren't you more-"

"Angry?" Alice finally looked at him, "I would never feel angry about my brother in that way. I am told I have talent and all that shit, but honestly, I don't care. I'm fine cruising through life just asking stupid questions about it and fucking stuff up. My brother is different, he acts tough but he's rather fragile. He's hard on himself when he thinks he hasn't done well, it's the complete opposite of me. I've built up a I-do-not-give-a-fuck attitude so I don't feel disappointed ever, I'll never blame my brother for doing well at what he does. I just never said I wouldn't make fun of him along the way."

Alice smiled a soft smile, "he's my Dobe, and I love him greatly."

"Dobe?!" Naruto squawked, "why do you call him that if he's so good?!"

"Because he spent one year choking at sport," Alice drawled. "I can make fun of him for that 'cause it's ironic and frankly hilarious in my family."

Sakura tugged on Alice's arm, "you said he was older than you by a year. Is he fifteen?" Alice nodded before freezing, "what's the date?!" She looked around frantically, "guys what's the fucking date?!" She almost screamed out the last part she was so frantic. Sakura placed her hand lightly on Alice's arm, "calm down Alice it's the twenty fifth. What's so bad about that?"

"Wh-what so bad?" Alice asked shakily, "what's so fucking bad?!"

Sasuke instantly began to back up, he knew one of Alice's blow-ups. And judging by the way her whole body was shaking, this was the bad feeling he had earlier. Although he was surprised when tears began to pool up in Alice's eyes. The shaking wasn't from anger, it was from sadness.

"Alice!" Naruto grabbed the trembling girl by the shoulders, "what's wrong?! What did we do? Was it something I did? Or was it Teme?"

Sasuke slapped Naruto away, "Dobe it's obviously something to do with the date you idiot!" He knelt down in front of Alice, "what the hell is wrong?"

"My bro-other," Alice gasped, "I missed his birthday." She let out a small sob a clenched her shoulders, "he was turning sixteen and I missed it! That's the most important part of your teens either than eighteen! He was going to get his L's. He might find a girlfriend while I'm gone. I just….I just missed an important part of my family's life."

Honestly Sasuke had no clue how to answer to that. Naruto wasn't much help either. Luckily Sakura had relatives and being a ninja and completing her duties made her miss important times in her small family. She gathered Alice up in a hug and gently soothed her until her sobs turned into hiccups.

"You know I missed my mum's birthday while we we're on a mission to wave."

Alice peeked her head up at that. Seeing that she has Alice's attention, Sakura continued to talk about her family. She talked about how her parents threw a small party when Sakura had come back, and that her mum hadn't opened her presents until Sakura was home. She talked about what it was like to be a civilian in a clan's profession. And as she talked, she didn't realise that she had the attention of both Naruto and Sasuke as well. The two boys were often so caught up in their own loneliness and hardships that they hadn't even asked about their female teammate.

Sakura had to juggle clan stuff, although her clan wasn't big they still had obligations. There was also dealing with stuff at home, and managing to squeeze in any family time between training and missions. She hadn't had a proper sit down dinner with her family for more than two days in a row since training took up her time. Although she was a civilian and hadn't faced many hardships in her life, Sakura had to juggle more stuff than a year twelve studying for their HSC **(A/N: Graduating high school and all that shazzam)**

Alice was content to listen to Sakura talk rather than listen to the voice inside her head that kept saying she had betrayed her family by missing out on her brother's birthday. She knew she was going to have nightmares tonight. If Anko let her sleep that is.

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

I stared at Kakashi, "I can do the wall walki-what? Fine!-_tree_ walking exercise already." Kakashi just watched me suspiciously, "prove it then." I lifted my head up proudly, "fine! I will. Watch this scarecrow and feel stupid."

Man I was so glad that I did the exercise right then, it would've been _so _embarrassing. Thank you chakra control god!

I grinned cheekily down at Kakashi from the top branch I was on, "is this sufficient?" He merely nodded and gestured me to come down. I stalled slightly, I knew what was going to come next. And I'm sure I wasn't going to like it.

Kakashi tucked away his ever present book and sat down on the grass against the tree I had climbed. I dropped down, hesitantly sitting next to him and prepared myself for what came next. Unfortunately Kakashi was content for me to sit and squirm a little before he talked. After what seemed forever, Kakashi turned to me with a serious glint in his eye. "I've noticed you've stopped calling me Kakashi-sensei."

"Mn." I fiddled with the bandages that were always present on my left arm. "I have no need since I already have a sensei, one who has taken me on like a apprentice. I guess she could be my shishō, but that doesn't really seem to be her style, and I call her nee-chan anyway."

Kakashi looked curious at that, "you have a new sensei? May I ask who she is?"

"You may," a smile tugged at my mouth, "it's Anko. Mitarashi Anko." I full on smiled at Kakashi's astonished expression, "yeah it's that Anko. The crazy snake lady of Konoha, and my new sensei."

"You can call more than one person a sensei," said Kakashi quietly. He wasn't looking at me anymore, his gaze was directed forward and away from me. "Mn," I didn't exactly know what to say here. It seemed like Kakashi needed to be comforted, but was trying to act cool about it. Well….when in doubt, hug it out.

He instantly stiffened when I lightly put my arms around his shoulders. He lifted his arms up to actually look at me, "Alice what are you doing?"

"You can call more than one person chan," I retorted as I now hugged him around the waist. I gripped his waist tightly and buried my face into the soft material of his shirt so I wouldn't see his hesitant face. I was surprised though, when an arm was slowly placed around me. Taking it as a small victory, I grinned into his shirt, "thanks…Kakashi-sensei."

"Thank you, Alice-chan."

* * *

"So you kissed and made up with Scarecrow eh?"

I snorted at Anko's 'delicate' way of putting my hugging session with Kakashi. "Yeah Anko-nee, we totally snogged and all that shit."

"I fucking knew it!" Anko grinned at me to show she was playing along, "now let's see if you can get you mind out of the gutter and into ninjutsu!"

My mouth dropped open in surprise, "ninjutsu?! Oh my fucking Kami! We get to do that already?! But we did poison last night, I'm pretty sure I haven't learnt everything about poison yet Anko-nee."

A very _ladylike _snort came from Anko, "you know fucking shit about poison girly! We're doing ninjutsu today because, A. I feel like it. B. I want to see you actually use that mimicking skill. And C. I actually have a schedule you need to follow. Actually it's more like a training regime, but whatever. Now let's get started!"

I cheered happily, "yay for ninjutsu! It's fucking awesome!"

"You fucking bet it's fucking awesome," Anko flicked me on the nose, "but shut up and listen. You're going to learn an E-rank ninjutsu called the Henge. E-rank basically means even you should be able to do it with your shit control. Now it's a 'transformation' technique, but it basically is a minor genjutsu that changes how you look. What people don't realise though, is that when you put on a henge, if you come in contact with someone they can feel the fabric, skin and shit of you. So don't get cocky with it, it's not a fucking shape shift or anything."

I nodded easily at Anko's explanation, I already knew all of this but something was bugging me. You aren't meant to be able to properly transform into the person, or, object that you henge into. Like Anko said, it was a minor genjutsu. But in the series, Naruto transformed into an actual girl when he did his oiroike no jutsu. He also transformed into a Fūma shuriken that Sasuke could _actually _catch and toss. That definitely was no illusion. Either than being a jinchurriki, the only difference between Naruto and any other person, was his insane level of chakra.

Well Kakashi said I had a fuck load of chakra (not that he put it that way exactly), so maybe I could overload the jutsu with chakra to make it real. That was, after I learnt how to do it safely.

Anko clapped her hands together, "this is the hand seals. I'll only show you once, so watch this closely and don't fuck up." She twisted her hands into three signs I already knew. "That's dog, boar, tiger. Is that right Anko-nee?"

"So you're not completely useless my little girly girl." I scowled at Anko's comment, "call me anything but girly girl. It insults my entire being."

"Yeah, yeah," Anko waved me off, "now are you going to do the jutsu or what?"

"Well what am I turning into?"

"Who do ya think?"

"Some sexy chick. Unfortunately I don't know anyone I can turn into."

"Why you little!"

I began to go through the seals of a Henge as I ran away from Anko, "first try's the charm!" A white cloud obscured my vision for a second and I quickly wheeled around to Anko, "did I do it?!"

She began to laugh obnoxiously, "not even close! You made your hair purple and that's about it!" I scowled and grabbed the end of my hair so I could pull it around and see what I did. Anko was right, my hair was a deep purple, just off Anko's own colour. The cool thing was, it looked spikier than before.

"Anko-nee!" Anko looked up at me from where she was curled over laughing, "what is it loser child?!"

Ignoring her comment I showed her my hair, "even if it's not a full transformation it's changed colour." I made her grab my hair, "and look! It's spikier than before! Just like yours!"

"So what?"

I rolled my eyes at her bored question, "so! You shouldn't be able to feel the spikes or anything!" As her eyes widened in realisation I continued, "this means it wasn't a henge. If you overload the technique with your chakra it makes it real!"

Anko grabbed me by the shoulders, "kid you have just revolutionised ninjutsu as you know it!" I grinned at her, "nah you can thank Uzumaki Naruto for that. He was the first person I realised who could actually do that. I simply copied what he did, but I think you need really big chakra reserves so you can do it."

She looked thoughtful for a moment, "I think you're right girly. I know that Kyūbi brat has a fuck load of chakra and I could sense that you had heaps to. I'll run some tests with the other jōnin and see who can do it, hopefully Scarecrow can't do it that bastard."

I rolled my eyes, "whatever Anko-nee, let's just perfect this ninjutsu already. I want to actually get some sleep tonight."

* * *

**Haha yep it's getting onto the actual mimicking part now.**

**Every time I finish a chapter, it'll most likely finish with Alice learning something from Anko. There was softy moments and all that stuff, but hopefully at least one of you laughed.**

**I'm nearly up to forty reviews though! Happy times guys!**

**I also have a cover to this story. It was drawn by me so that you know what Alice looks like. Hopefully it was good.**

**See you soon!**


	11. Act 1 Part 8: Nightmares and truth

**Wow in one day I got five reviews like, bang, bang, bang! It was so awesome for me! A special mention to Arcami for being the fortieth reviewer. Huzzah!**

**This was wrote quickly after the last chapter because I was **_**just that bored.**_** It feels like I can't find anymore good fan fiction stories. I want an OC story that I haven't read, is funny, and won't bore me half to death. I'm a picky bitch who, if it's not good in the first chapter, I won't read it at all. I'm just really bored of FF now.**

**Which isn't good.**

**Ah well, here's some Alicey-goodness to make me feel better. Well writing it is annoying, but I love Alice too much to not write about her!**

**MAJOR WARNING: There will not be lemons or limes! It's just a fluffy sort of thing I decided to add to the story. I'm sorry if you dislike it, or the slightly depressing stuff before it. I promise I'm just clearing out all of Alice's angst and making Sasuke feel slightly more comfortable (or awkward) around her. Please don't kill me after this! I was just releasing some fluffy feelings I gathered last night from a story. The adorableness!**

**Anyway, here we go!**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_The war is nearly over! What are we gonna do when it ends?! I don't own Naruto as well_

**Warning: **_Gah! L-a-n-g-u-a-g-e. What does that spell? There's fucking language. Also a warning of severely strange Inception, dismembering and the last of Alice's family angst! Oh and there's some fluff as well. Quite touching really._

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

I went to bed feeling exhausted. Anko had made me experiment with the Henge so long I had chakra exhaustion! Well considering the fact I was ridiculously overpowering the technique might've had something to do with that. I hadn't got much further in transforming, it seemed the best I could do was change my hair colour slightly. I had changed it to Sakura's bubble gum pink after I practised changing into Anko.

So not too much success so far, but I was still excited to do more training on the Henge.

I crawled silently through the window Anko had unlocked to kidnap me and staggered over to my 'bed.' Although the couch wasn't the comfiest place to sleep, it was almost like a home base. I always felt safe under the thin blanket there.

Unfortunately I seemed to forget my comment from earlier on that day.

* * *

I woke with a start. Anko wasn't here so why did I wake up so quickly? Gazing at the off-white ceiling I tried my best to wake up and think. Slowly a thought came to me, wasn't everything in Sasuke's house either white or a warm brown colour? The colour of this looked exactly like….

I sat upright and stared around at the once familiar room. My keyboard and guitars sat in the corner of the small room and the chest of draws I had for so long rested at the end of my patchwork bed.

The frame of my bed shook as I slowly crawled out of it. I brushed my fingers against the chest as I walked to the end of my bed. My school uniform was folded over the bed like it always was, waiting for me to get changed for school.

I bit my lip and changed into the uniform as tears threatened to spill over. I glanced at my alarm clock and yelped when I realised that I was going to be late for the bus if I didn't leave now.

Racing downstairs I grabbed a banana and my schoolbag that was always waiting for me at the door. Cramming my shoes on, I ran down the street to the bus stop. I knew my parents and brother were either at work or training when I woke up, so I wasn't too worried about not seeing them.

I was a bit curious as to why my guy friend wasn't at the bus stop waiting for me. He normally rode the bus with me until where my old school used to be. I brushed the thought aside as I leapt onto the bus and flashed my bus card at the bus driver. I ignored the weird look he gave me as I walked down to the back to my usual seat.

I didn't have my IPod, but I was content to simply stare out the window as the bus began its hour trip to school. The trip seemed to fly by, the only noticeable thing was that everyone seemed to be acting strangely on this bus, a lot of whispering to each other. Curious.

Also, none of the kids from my school were on the bus. Maybe I didn't realise there was a teachers strike or something along those lines. Ah well, it didn't really matter, one of my friends was always there at school anyway.

I hopped off the bus at the train station and began to walk to school. Again people seemed to be whispering to each other as I walked, but I couldn't see through the tinted car windows to see if it was them. Where was the whispering coming from?

Ignoring the chills going up my spine and the sense of foreboding now lying heavily in my gut, I slowly trudged to the lights in front of the school. As I walked across the street, the whispering increased and I could now feel stares of the people queuing in their cars. Mega creepy.

I could hear the normal noises of school as I swiped on the swipe machine just inside of the main quad where my girls sat.

My girls….That weird dream about the Narutoverse made it seem like I hadn't seen them in ages! I could feel my pulse quicken as I hurried into the cool light of the open area where most of my year sat.

A flash of red dyed hair caught my attention. That was….haha Rich Bitch! My ever rude friend Molly's hair flicked from between a sudden crowd of people. I halted as many people of my year group blocked my view. The soccer boys, drama kids, the book readers…

"Hey guys!" I smiled at them, "what is it? Did I miss something? Am I wearing the wrong clothe? Like is it mufti-day?" I was wearing the same uniform as them, what I wasn't wearing was the looks of what I knew to be disgust and fear on their face.

Backing away slightly I tried to look over them to where my friends were. "MOLLY?!" I jumped up to see, "where the hell are you Rich Bitch?!"

Scowling at the crowd in front of me I tried to reason with them, "c'mon guys stop messing around."

A boy from my class last year, Julian, stepped forward. I watched him cautiously as he slowly walked towards me, "Julian? What are you doing?" Unlike the others, his face was a look of….pure, cold…..rage.

Deciding to just go for it, I sprinted straight into the crowd. "MOVE IT OR LOSE IT!" I should've realised something was up when I managed to do a deep slide under a boy's grasping arm. I could've never done that, I didn't have enough flexibility. It took another two minutes to muscle my way through the crowd. When I basically fell through the last gap, it seemed like everything was silent.

Six of them. All six of my girls were sitting down on the benches that we always sat at, chatting with no care in the world. Like a mob didn't form right in front of them.

I crept slowly towards them, it felt like a dream. "Molly," the whisper came softly from my throat, but the dyed red head stiffened all the same. "Megsy, Josie, Jen, Annie, Lu!" I began to run towards the girls that were just turning to face me. I was about to hug the dark frame of Jen when an iron grip closed around my arm.

"Josie?..." I trembled slightly under Josie's uncharacteristically dark glare. Her naturally ginger hair seemed to sway angrily as her glare bored into my eyes, "Jose what's wrong?"

"Freak."

I recoiled slightly at her venomous tone and her words, "what?! Jose what the hell is-"

A piercing scream came from my left and I turned to find petite Annie had fallen off her bench. The worst part was the way she was gazing at me with terrified eyes as she struggled back into a corner. She was dragging herself by her arms as she kept her petrified blue eyes on me, like I was going to kill her.

I reached out towards her with my free arm when Molly clenched onto that one as well. Her baleful blue eyes glared at me as she tugged on my arms painfully. She was so much shorter than me, but this time she actually looked threatening. Molly was our little spitfire, but this was the first time I felt scared when I faced her.

"You disgust me."

I was choking back sobs as Jen's scared and disgusted voice came from behind me. Lu circled me warily and alternated between glaring and looking terrified.

"What are you doing guys?" My left arm felt like it was burning, I didn't know if it was from Molly's iron grip or not. But judging by the way she hissed and let go of my arm, it was hurting her to. Angry, red burns boiled under Molly's skin as she gripped her wrist, "what did you do freak!"

"I didn't do anything?!" I ripped my arm from Josie's grasp and tried to walk towards her, "Mol-"

"Don't come near me!" Molly was now terrified as she cowered on the ground. "Just get away from here abomination! You're a soulless monster who is going to kill us all!"

Jen shoved me from behind, "just leave us alone!"

Josie shoved my from my right side, "go away freak!"

Meg clawed at my face, "who do you think you are?!"

Lu pulled at my hair as I stumbled towards her and shoved me down, "why are you still here?"

A sharp kick came from the now angry Annie, "I don't want you near me!"

Finally a now upright Molly kicked me under me arched stomach and sent my into a standing position, "go you psycho murdering bitch!"

I was openly crying now as my friends continued to play a cruel game of shoves. One that involved punching, kicking and Karate moves from Josie's way. I stumbled around blindly until the girls were suddenly gathered in front of me. All of them wore cruel smiles, "you were never our friend! We took pity on you, you poor frightened _rat_. You are just a heartless bitch who lives for no one but herself. You're a freak of nature and shouldn't live!"

I was feeling concussed from the beating, so I couldn't see who kicked me, but I felt the sharp pain as I flew back. I slowly fell, it felt like forever. The mob were waiting for me and began to tear at me as I fell down into oblivion.

The only thing I felt was the cold burning sensation in my left arm as I fell forever.

* * *

I gasped and flailed around, oh Kami it was so dark. There was just me and a void of dark nothingness, but I could see blobs of colour coming my way.

"Mum, dad?" I staggered upright as my parents walked towards me. "Mum! Dad! I've missed you so much! I didn't know where you were, and I jus-"

"You are no child of mine."

I flinched as those harsh words came from mum's mouth. "Mum! Please not you to! Why is this happening? I'm so confused and-"

"You never stop talking." Dad's aqua eyes glared into mine. He was the nice one, he would never do this to me! I looked at him pleadingly as I dragged my beaten legs towards him, "you don't mean that Ojii-san. Remember! I always called you Ojii-san a-"

"Yes and I always called you demon child," dad's mouth curled up in a cruel smile that I had never seen him wear. Mum smirked and grabbed dad's hand, "we simply made sure you were never around when we told our friends that." She laughed scornfully and turned away, "I hope you rot in hell murder."

"MUM! DAD!"

They slowly disappeared and I was left alone in the darkness. I simply collapsed forward and stared down into more darkness. There was no floor, but I seemed to be able to lay down on something solid. The darkness began to ripple and I watched in horror as it turned into a mirror. I was standing upright now, but I didn't notice, I was too bust staring in horror at what was in front of me.

My body gazed back at me with a twisted smile on its face. A yellow eye glared at me and the black of its eye seemed to never end. There was a purple-black skin colour around that eye that crept down its face and down its left arm. The arm was a mottled colour with long, piercing nails that reached out at me.

_You are a monster child._

I shook my head at the hissing monster version of me, "no I'm not!"

_Oh yes you are my dear. You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to your 'loved ones.' The true fact is that no one truly loves you. You're despised and scorned. Feared and hated. You are an abomination to human nature._

I guess what was the equivalent to Yami-Alice smirked at me, the strangely coloured skin was slowly taking over the regularly coloured skin. Its hair was spiking up and I could see a horn slowly twisting out of the left side of her head.

"Screw you!" I put the finger up at Yami-Alice, "I'll never be like you!"

It merely chuckled and ran its grotesquely long tongue over its sharp teeth.

_Just embrace your inner nature, your true nature. I promise that everything will be better. Let the darkness take over, become part of me._

The long folds of Shingami's cloak swept over me and I went tumbling backwards again. I only fell for a short time, but I now found myself back at home in the living room.

"A dream," I panted, "it was just a dream." I clutched at my chest as my heart beat wildly, "everything's alright Alice." I felt myself calm down and my heart slow. I looked around the room that was joint to the kitchen, "I wonder what day it is?"

A low thrum of noise brought my attention to the teenager who was facing away from me as he bobbed his head along to the earphones in his ear. I grinned at the back of his dark hair with natural blond highlights, "Dobe!"

He didn't respond as he continued to listen to his music at full belt. As usual. I flipped over the long couch he was sitting on and leaned into him, "you won't guess the dream I just had!" My brother usually listened to my dreams and I rambled on loudly (so he could hear) about the strange dream of meeting Shingami and going to the Narutoverse. I described my experiences with Team Seven and how I had Anko as my teacher. As I finished telling him about how I had made Sasuke trip down the stairs at his house, my brother finally moved.

But he stood up and walked away without another word.

"Hey Dobe!" I marched after him, "are you on your male PMS again? I don't especially want to deal with you being all pissy and shit again."

"Well imagine my pain of having to experience living with you for fourteen years." Normally I would've laughed at such a comment, but that wasn't the bored tone he normally used, or the slightly amused one. It was mocking and pain-filled, like it had actually hurt him to be even near me.

I stumbled slightly at that, "what do you mean Dobe?"

His frigid aqua eyes bored into mine with such a look of _hatred, _I felt tears begin to well up again. "D-dobe please!"

"D-dobe please," he mocked in a high-pitched voice. His eyes hardened again as he advanced on me, his three inches felt like much more when he towered over me. "I'm so sick of you! I'm always putting up with your bitching and moaning, you're not even worth a second of my time!" He smiled kindly at me, something that scared me more than his unusual yelling. "Remember all those times we had _so _much fun together?! Laughing, playing, wrestling? Well fuck those times!" His hand snapped across my face, "they mean nothing to me!"

Another hand crashed across my face, this time it was a fist. A merciless beating came from my brother as I tried to half-heartedly fend him off, "please stop!"

A fist stopped right before my nose, "stop?" His eyes glimmered dangerously, "I'll stop when I've eradicated your useless existence off this planet!" The fist smashed into my face and I felt my nose cave in from the force of it.

I cradled my nose and tried to blink away the blurriness that blocked my view. I saw the shape of my brother stare at me before spitting on me and walking off.

A cold, burning rage began to build up in my gut. I couldn't hear anything over the roaring sound that filled my ears and drowned everything else out. I gnashed my teeth as my nose clicked into place and I began to advance towards my laughing brother's form. I curled my clawed fingers and flexed out my mottled arms. I brushed against my brothers' neck and laughed when his startled face turned to me.

"Repentance." I stabbed my claws into his aqua eyes. Red blood stained his tanned kin as I slowly slid the nails down through his head, like a hot knife through butter. I continued to slowly dismember what used to be my siblings, taking my time with each and every limb.

I watched as a creature feasted on my brothers' corpse. That is me?...What is going on? I'm so confused…

I let out a scream as the creature which looked halfway transformed between me and Shingami, turned to face me. Blood slid down its fanged mouth as it snarled at me, before licking its lips. It prowled towards me slowly, a predator never hurried after easy prey. I stood stiffly as it circled closer and didn't make a sound as it leapt at me.

* * *

I woke up with a scream.

My throat was hurting and my scream was hoarse, but I continued on loudly. I couldn't breathe under the suffocating darkness that seemed to surround me. I couldn't tell if I was dreaming, or truly awake. What was really reality?

I began to cry loudly, I was scared and I felt sick to my core. I had killed my brother! I had killed my brother. Killed my brother. Killed my brother.

The mantra kept repeating in my head as I rocked back and forth. My arms were wrapped around my legs and I continued to sob into my chest loudly. The darkness was suffocating and scary, but I was more scared of what I was going to see when the light turned on. I just kept crying and rocking back and forth.

"Alice?"

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Sasuke woke with a start as a loud, piercing scream echoed around his room. Instantly a kunai was in his hand and he slid silently out of bed. The scream made him cringe from the shrill sound, and from the amount of raw emotions in it.

Fear, despair and panic were all heard in the scream.

Sasuke dropped the kunai as he realised the now sobbing noise was from Alice downstairs. He sprinted out of the room and easily cleared the stairs in his haste to get to the clearly distraught girl.

The sobs were slightly muffled, but Sasuke could hear something being mumbled under Alice's breath as she rocked back and forth on the couch. Her face was buried in her arms and he could barely hear the words she was saying, but when he did catch it, his blood ran cold.

"I killed my brother. Killed my brother. Killed him. Killed him."

Sasuke crept over to the girl and crouched down in front of her so he was in eye-level with her. He reached out to touch her but hesitated.

"Alice?"

* * *

Alice snapped her gaze up to the barely visible boy that crouched in front of her. She could barely see him because of the way his dark hair, eyes and clothes seemed to blend into the night. But his pale skin shone in the weak moonlight that came in through her Escape window. Her eyes were drawn to the onyx ones that stared at her with an expression she had never seen on him before.

She felt more tears pool in her eyes as the worried eyes bore into hers. Alice slowly hung her head and leaned forward until she was touching his chest with her forehead. He tensed at her touch, but Alice ignore that, she just wanted to feel that someone was alive. And that they wouldn't run from her.

She hiccupped slightly, "Sasuke."

* * *

When Sasuke had said her name, Alice's head had tucked out from her arms and her eyes were instantly staring into his. He felt like he was drowning for a moment as her emerald eyes seemed to glow in the darkness. Her normally tied up hair was mussed from sleep and curled around her shoulders and down her back. But Sasuke didn't take any of that in, he was too focused on the tears that were beginning to develop in her eyes.

He felt a weird sensation in his heart when he stared at her sad and panicked eyes. Without knowing, his expression softened further, not pity, but understanding. He too had woken up afraid and alone after nightmares, and judging from what she had said before, it was a bad one.

He watched as she slowly hung her head and leant forward. A hot feeling burned his chest as Alice leaned her head against his chest. Sasuke couldn't help but tense at the contact, but then relaxed when she realised that was all she was going to do.

A small hiccup was heard from her as tears began to dampen his sleeping shirt. "Sasuke."

Her voice was raw and tired sounding, like she had seen so much that night and he was the best thing that had happened. Sasuke huffed out a breath and hesitantly placed a hand on her head.

Instead of tensing like he thought she would, Alice seemed to relax further at his touch. Sasuke began to slowly run his hand down her hair in a soothing manner, much like his mother used to do when he had nightmares when he was little.

Alice sniffled into his chest, "I'm sorry."

Again her voice sounded tired, and unnaturally defeated. This was not the loud and proud Alice Sasuke knew. Her bravado was gone, and she broke down for the second time that day. Only this time, Sasuke was the one there to comfort her.

* * *

Alice wasn't too sure what to do next. She was so tired, but the idea of being down here alone actually scared her. It scared her as much as the thought of her brother being dead since that image would haunt her as soon as she was alone.

She gently tugged on Sasuke's shirt, "Sasuke?"

A slight shift of material was heard as he leant down to where her face was buried into his shirt. Alice was suddenly feeling very shy, "do you-do you think I could sleep with you tonight? I just…I don't want to be alone tonight."

She felt Sasuke stiffen slightly at her request, but was surprised at his answer. "Ah..yeah Alice. Just this one time okay?"

He sounded unsure when he asked it, but Alice nodded and began to stand up. Sasuke quickly rose up and grabbed the hand that wasn't fisted in his shirt to guide her. He slowly began to walk up the stairs with the unsteady brunette, very aware that his father wouldn't be pleased about his actions.

But he surprisingly didn't care.

Alice clung to Sasuke as they entered Sasuke's room, a plain room with unassuming features. Alice didn't notice any of the décor though, Sasuke was busy guiding her to the large, double bed that had rumpled sheets at the end.

Alice let go of Sasuke's hand and shirt so she could crawl over to the other side of the bed. She curled on her side as Sasuke climbed onto his side.

Sasuke lay on his back with his arms by his side, he stared at the ceiling stubbornly. The bed suddenly shifted as Alice leant down and pulled the sheets up and over her, cocooning herself tightly.

Onyx eyes glanced towards her, but Alice's emerald eyes were boring into him. She looked extremely shy and quickly slid her eyes shut. Sasuke stared at her for a moment before turning his gaze back to the ceiling.

A moment of silence passed until Alice's whisper, "Sasuke?"

Said boys gaze drifted down to her, "hn?"

She hesitated slightly before looking determined. She shifted closer to the Uchiha, close enough for the Uchiha to start panicking slightly, but the girl merely tucked her head firmly into his side and curled up next to him.

A burning feeling came from Alice's contact again, Sasuke didn't know what to do. His arms were by his side, but Alice had managed to shift under his left arm. His arm lay limply over her shoulder, hot fire pulsing across his arm.

Alice's body heat was strangely hot, like a small furnace next to Sasuke. Her touch warmed him easily, better than any blanket he had ever had. He mentally shrugged and slowly relaxed, letting his whole posture loosen again.

* * *

Wherever Alice touched Sasuke, his cool body temperature seemed to sooth her burning skin. She always felt flushed after a nightmare, but never sweaty. This was also the first time she had screamed because of a nightmare.

It was also the first time Sasuke had ever had a girl in his bed.

A night of firsts it seemed.

Alice was content to listen to Sasuke's breath even out as he fell asleep. She had always craved human contact, so Sasuke was correct to let her lie next to him. Her eyelids slowly slid shut and she fell asleep not too long after Sasuke.

* * *

The sun's rays slowly peeked through the open window of Sasuke's room. The sunlight lit up the forms currently sleeping on the bed.

Alice stirred slightly before dropping into a deeper slumber, her arms tightening on what she was holding.

Sasuke shifted and nuzzled deeper into the sweet smelling stuff his face was buried into.

Alice was gripping onto Sasuke's left arm as she lay her head on his shoulder. Her head was tucked under Sasuke's, his face was buried into her hair that was bunched around her head. The two of them were sleeping soundly as the sheets of the bed were tangled around their intertwined legs.

A bird chirped loudly from outside and Alice again stirred from the annoying sound. Her eyelids slid open and then blinked sleepily at the small rays of sunlight that managed to reach her. She felt warm and comfortable, like she felt when she was wrapped up in winter under her blankets.

Alice wiggled her head further into her pillow to get comfortable, but stiffened at the definitely harder surface. The pillow Sasuke had given her for the couch downstairs wasn't quite _this _hard.

Flashes of the night before sped through her mind.

_Friends. Betrayed. Parents. Monster. Mirror. Abomination. Yami-Alice. Shingami. Dobe. Beating. Burning. Rage. Pride. Blood. BROTHER DEAD!_

Alice shook away the fears from the dream and focused on what happened next.

_Crying. Screaming. Onyx. Soft. Fisted hand. Hand in hers. Sasuke's bedroom. Scared. Shy. Cool. Content._

She stiffened as she realised where she was. She carefully shifted her head and then froze as Sasuke moved. His left arm pulling on the two of her own that were wrapped around his. Her hands in his. Sasuke's arm pulled her more firmly against him, his head buried deeply into her hair.

A slight squeaking noise came from Alice, Sasuke was practically cuddling her! And the deal was sealed when Sasuke's right arm was slung over her.

'Take deep breaths Alice.' She chanted, 'it'll be okay as long as he doesn't wake up!'

She wanted to murder the god responsible for Sasuke to mumble slightly as slowly wake up. 'Yeah fuck you to Karma.'

* * *

Sasuke slowly woke up to a scent of apple and something spicy, like cinnamon. He breathed in the delicious scent of his pillow and wondered when it got so soft.

He was still sleepy when he felt something warm in his arms, and didn't flinch at the slight squeak that came from the tightening of his arms. Deciding he should check out what was so warm, he slowly slid his head from the pillow and rested his chin on the top of his shoulder.

His sleepy, onyx eyes stared into wide emerald ones. He smiled slightly at the colour, "such a nice shade of green…"

Again the squeaking noise sounded.

Sasuke leaned back and looked at what was in his arms. A light blue t-shirt and pink shorts with long, tanned legs coming from those shorts. Again a sleepy smile stole across his face as he leaned his head against whatever was on his chest.

That nice shade of green was still there and he took time to stare at the lovely emerald. He continued to stare at it, feeling disappointed whenever it disappeared, but it was only for a second.

"Sasuke."

Whoever had whispered had said his name. Feeling slightly more alert he grunted in reply.

"Sasuke I think you need to let go of me."

He breathed in the spicy apple taste, "mmnnn?"

"C'mon Sasuke, wake up."

The warmth in his arms began to wriggle and squirm, "Sasuke. I'm warning you, wake up already!"

The shout of wake up certainly woke him up. He just wished he could go straight back to sleep, or pass out, at what he saw.

Alice's face was exceptionally close to his, merely inches away. Her panicked eyes looked pleadingly at him, her tanned face looked slightly pink. Sasuke could count the freckles across her nose and cheeks, he never really could see them before.

Her hands were gripped in his left, and he could feel that his right arm was thrown over her. The reason why she was pinned against him.

And judging by the feelings of his legs, he would have to guess that his legs were tangled with hers.

Heat instantly exploded up his face and he betted a hundred yen that his normally pale cheeks were bright red. He slowly leaned his head back from Alice, "uhhhh," he said intelligently.

"Yeah," replied Alice, "I think we should let go of each other's hands."

Sasuke slowly unclasped his hand from Alice's two, instantly feeling the loss of warmth. He carefully retracted that arm, and the one that was slung over her.

Alice gently tugged her legs from his and Sasuke was quick to do the same.

Both of them stared at each other for a moment. "I think you should take your head off…" Sasuke spoke quietly and trailed off at the end.

"Oh! Yeah!" Alice lifted her head off Sasuke's shoulder as the boy let her untuck herself from under his chin.

The two never broke eye contact throughout the whole mauver, both highly embarrassed about the situation. Alice carefully slid out of Sasuke's personal space, "I'm really sorry about that. I am rather clingy sometimes and I always like human contact so…"

Sasuke swallowed nervously, "heh yeah…It can be my fault as well. It sometimes takes me a while to wake up in the morning so...Sorry about, nuzzling your hair and stuff."

Alice smiled slightly, "nah I'm surprised you even liked the feel of it! And I'm sorry for grabbing your arm and lying on you, it must've been uncomfortable."

"Not really." Sasuke paused at the strange look Alice was giving him, "I mean you were warm! And your hair smells really good! And..and!"

"Chill Sasuke," laughed Alice, "let's just pretend this never happened and keep the awkwardness to a minimum okay?"

Sasuke nodded, "I can agree with that."

A more playful smile curled up Alice's lips, "so you were blushing. You were flustered, _and _you can be clingy. You're sleepy in the morning and if I sleep on you again, I could get this reaction from you once more." She looked thoughtful for a moment, "I wonder if your whole face will flush if I lie on you completely.."

Sasuke spluttered, "shut up Alice!"

Said girl smirked at him, "stop acting so out of character Sasuke! It's just little, ol' me, your friendly neighbourhood Alice!"

Sasuke scowled at her, "you retard."

"There's you usual charm," cheered Alice. She was smiling at Sasuke cheekily, "shouldn't we get up for training?"

"No," disagreed Sasuke, "it's the weekend idiot."

"Oh."

There was a slight pause between them as they continued to stare at each other. Sasuke narrowed her eyes at Alice, "can you get the hell out of my bed."

"Do I have to? It's so comfy!"

"Get the hell out now!"

* * *

**And there it is! The maker or breaker of my readers. The scene will make you love, or hate this thing.**

**Also, there won't be a scene like this for a long time.**

**That's all the angst, fluff, and OOCness for a while now. It's going to focus on Alice's ties to the village, her progress, and lots of weird things with Team Seven.**

**The reason why I wrote that scene?**

**I had just read **_**Endear me**_** last night. It's one of the only stories to make me feel actually happy about an intimate scene. If you haven't read that story, you should. If it made my romance-hating heart like it, it's gotta be good.**

**Sasuke OOCness.**

**Sasuke felt both sorry and understanding to Alice. That's why he comforted her, because no one had done that to him in ages and he knew how much she needed it.**

**Sasuke let Alice come into his bed to sleep purely for a few reasons. Both he and Alice were tired and he knew Alice wasn't going to sleep much that night, when she said she could sleep better that way, he simply did as she asked. He was also tired, it's like one or two in the morning and his brain is fried. **

**Sasuke let Alice get close to him because frankly, he was surprised and shocked. Therefore he didn't have a chance to say no. He also found her heat quite nice, he thought she would just lie there for the whole night.**

**Alice woke up first from her slight insomnia, that she wakes with the sun. Sasuke **_**is **_**a trained ninja, but after a week of training, he's just a young boy who likes his sleep. I made him a slow waker in relaxed situations for this reason.**

**Why was he flustered and blushing? If I found a guy right in front of me, kissing width apart, I would be flustered to. Sasuke (surprisingly) does have a heart, and as they say, no matter who you are, you're still a man.**

**Hope that clears up some stuff. See you soon!**

**(Oh look 6000 words. Yay for me)**


	12. Act 1 Part 9: Sakura Day

**Fuck school! I come back and you goddamn want me to do tests and assignments? Man I can't think in the holidays, let alone doing a maths test first thing in the morning.**

**And school you dare keep me from writing?!**

**Yes, blame school on my 'slow' update. It's school's fault that I didn't update sooner, but here you are~**

* * *

**Disclaimer: **_Naruto and anything referenced here I don't own_

**Warning: **_Probably language_

* * *

**3****rd**** Person P.O.V.**

Alice slowly drifted around the marketplace. Looking around hesitantly she cursed, she was only slightly lost, how hard was it to find that store with Sasuke's favourite tomatoes?

As she scanned the crowd for the small cart that sold really good vegetables, a flash of pink caught her attention.

Grinning slightly, Alice made her way over to a calm looking Sakura who was looking over a butchers' stall.

The basket in Alice's' arm thumped against her side from the weight of that weeks' groceries. She felt so happy that she wasn't shopping for more than her and Sasuke, carrying all that would be nearly impossible.

"Hey Sakura-chan!"

Said girl started at the shout of her name and turned to see a smiling Alice bound towards her.

"Hi Alice." Sakura shifted her own basket to the side as Alice hugged her. "Shopping as well are you? Quite a lot of food you've got there."

Alice shrugged slightly and pulled away from Sakura, "yeah, between Sasuke and I we eat a lot." She glared sullenly at the basket of food, "I really dislike shopping sometimes, and today is one of those days."

Sakura smiled at Alice's facial expression, "maybe it would be better if you were to shop with a friend?"

"That would be cool," agreed Alice. "Shopping with my little Sakura-chan huh?" She suddenly gasped and pointed at Sakura, "wait! My cute little imōto shopping all by herself! How dangerous is that?!"

Sakura rolled her eyes before punching Alice's shoulder, "quit being melodramatic, _nee-san_."

"No need to say it sarcastically," sniffed Alice, "I just adopted you as my little sister. I didn't make you call me master or anything."

"You wouldn't have done that," Sakura commented as she paid for her meats. Placing the meat into her basket she looked up, and then paled at Alice's quirked eyebrow, "you so would've."

Alice merely patted her on her head and made her way into the steady stream of people walking around to shop. "Hey Sakura do you know where that really good vegetable store is? You know the one with the awesome cucumber and lettuce?"

Sakura rolled her eyes again, "that's really helpful Alice."

"Shut up." Alice spun in a quick circle to see everywhere, "it's like Mono-no that's no right. Momo? Mokon…Mokuton? Motorbike?-"

"You mean Mokundo."

"Yes that's right," Alice beamed at Sakura, "I'm glad someone knows their way around here!"

Sakura smothered a laugh, "and how long has Sasuke-kun been making you do the shopping for him? Two weeks? Three?"

"Four," Alice said sullenly. "He was a real ass about it as well. He was all like, 'Alice go do the shopping.' No, 'Alice could you go shopping for us?' Or even a, 'please Alice?' What a douchebag."

"Sasuke-kun isn't a douchebag," flushed Sakura. "He's just-"

"A bigger dick than you had realised before?" Alice gave Sakura a knowing look, "sweetheart you need to get over this crush. Sasuke doesn't want his teammate to be a girl who's over him all the time and fawning over him. He doesn't even have feelings towards the opposite gender yet, he says after he has revenge he'll begin to work on rebuilding his clan. And honey," Alice shot a look at Sakura, "there will be no love involved."

Sakura flushed red at her statements, Sasuke-kun would eventually like her. Statistics show that if she continued to chase him, the odds would land in her favour. And an Uchiha would land in her lap.

A giggle bubbled up from her throat, but a hand whacking her on the side of her stopped it.

"Stop thinking perverted thoughts."

A bigger flush came over Sakura, "I wasn't!"

"I smell bullshit."

"Shut up Alice."

"Whatever." Alice looked at Sakura seriously as they came to a stop near a stall, "Sakura-chan…I need to be blunt and honest for you to realise how wrong chasing after Sasuke is. First of all," Alice folded her arms as she leant back on the posts of a cart, "have you noticed Sasuke is talking to you more recently then any time before?"

A thoughtful look came over Sakura, Alice was right. In the past week or two, Sasuke-kun had been actually saying a few words to her here and there. Sure they were usually a command or agreement with Kakashi-sensei, but they were words.

Alice mouth twitched as Sakura nodded hesitantly. "The reason he has been talking to you is because you've been taking your training more seriously. I know you've been studying those medical books and practising chakra control exercises, it's been showing! Your chakra control was good before but with the exercises you've been doing, it's become amazing! I reckon you're ready to practise using medical chakra!"

A blush worked its way across Sakura's face, no one had praised her chakra control skills so much. And it seemed so honest!

"But."

Sakura knew it was too good to be true.

"As soon as you see Sasuke at training, your super amazingly, smart brain turns to mush. You make a fool of yourself when you blush and stutter around Sasuke. You're never training because you're looking at Sasuke. You're neglecting yourself so you can look at some kid with a few good looks?! That's bullshit Sakura! It's stupid as fuck and you know it."

"But…" Sakura's gaze drifted down and she played with the basket in her hands nervously, "I think I….I might lo-"

"Stop."

Sakura's eyes shot straight up into Alice's serious gaze. Emerald green and jade eyes stared into each other. One serious and hard, the other nervous and surprised.

"You do not love Uchiha Sasuke."

Sakura flinched slightly from Alice's words, "no I really do l-"

"You are twelve," Alice deadpanned. "You're young, naïve and haven't even brushed the going into puberty stage, you won't truly love someone until many years in the future." Alice placed a hand on Sakura's shoulder, "you think Sasuke looks good and that attracts you, but it is nowhere near what love is."

The hand was shrugged off Sakura's shoulder, "no I really do love Sasuke-kun! I thin-"

"You think he is a good-looking boy who's mysterious and charismatic." The hand was placed softly on Sakura's head, "but you don't love him."

Tears began to form in Sakura's eyes, "but I thought..it felt like what they said love felt like. I had butterflies in my tummy every time I looked at him and I felt my heart race when I was anywhere near him. That can't be anything but love!" Wiping away the tears in her eyes, Sakura sniffled slightly and stared down at the ground.

Alice's hand ruffled Sakura's hair lightly, "listen Sakura-chan." A smile that was softer than Sakura had ever on Alice's face tilted her lips up, Alice's other hand was tilting Sakura's chin up to look at her. "You have so much time in front of you, I know there's better looking guys out there. Better personalities and better people to pretty girls like you. You just have to wait." She grinned goofily at Sakura, "the butterflies and stuff you're feeling is just interacting with boys of your age. I knew around your age I was constantly screwing up my speech with nerves whenever I talked to someone, both boy and girl."

"Stop talking all superior," hiccupped Sakura, "you're only two years older than me."

Alice's eyes sparked happily, "and don't you forget that Sakura-chan! Now let's go and find that delicious vegetable store and get to training!"

"Yeah!" Sakura chirped determinately as she linked arms with Alice, "I'll train harder than ever before!"

Alice laughed lightly, "I wouldn't expect anything else from my imōto!"

The duo began to make their way out of the small corner they had been conversing, between a building and a small cart that sold jewellery.

Sakura tugged Alice by their linked arms towards a familiar looking stall that had buckets of vegetables and fruits around it.

"Hey obā-san!" Alice waved her hand holding the basket at the old woman who ran the store, "I have come for Uchiha-san's usual delivery!"

"Of course Alice-chan," the old woman smiled at the pink-haired girl next to her usual customer, "and I see you have brought a friend."

Sakura dipped in a bow, "it's a pleasure to meet you miss."

The old woman chuckled lightly, "youths these days…"

"I know what you mean," Alice rolled her eyes, "so strangely polite when they want to be!"

Sakura glared at the brunette, "shut up Alice! I'll say it again, you're only two years older than me! That doesn't make you old!"

"My, my, my," a new voice entered the conversation, "I thought I heard the horrible screeching of Forehead."

A girl of Sakura's age glared at the pinkette with dull brown eyes as she leant against the counter the old woman was behind. The girl flicked her dark indigo hair from her face and smirked at the surprised Sakura, "what are you doing showcasing that huge forehead around here. You're gonna scare all of the boys away with that ugly mug of yours."

Alice frowned at the girls harsh words but stayed quiet, Sakura was strong enough to fight her own battles.

"Ami!" Sakura looked at the girl surprised, "I haven't seen you since the academy!"

The girl Ami snorted, "too busy sucking up to Sasuke-kun I bet. What would he see in an ugly girl like you?"

Sakura flushed, but this time it was angry flush that sparked her eyes with rage. "I am a kunoichi Ami, I don't have time for such trivial things as chasing after boys. It'll get me killed, but you wouldn't know about that, would you?"

Sakura's voice was dripping with sweetness as she fixed a smile on her face, but her words held hidden barbs that caused Ami to bristle.

"Shut up Forehead!"

"Great come back Ami," Sakura rolled her eyes, "you should write a book."

Alice smiled at her honorary sister, she would be just fine. Turning back to the old woman she smiled at her, "girls are funny things aren't they obā-san?"

"Quite," she agreed amused. "Here's Uchiha-san's usual order Alice-chan."

Alice beamed in reply and grabbed the bundle of fruits and vegetables the old woman handed to her, including a large bunch of tomatoes. As she stored the food away, an indignant sound came from behind her.

"Why are you buying Sasuke-kun's food?!" Ami glared at the older girl that quirked an eyebrow at her. She ignored the fact that the girl was older, her eyes were a brighter and more interesting shade than hers, or the fact that she actually had boobs, she was buying food for her Sasuke-kun!

"Alice lives with Sasuke-kun," Sakura said smugly, "how could you not know that Ami?"

Said girl spluttered unintelligently, this…bimbo! Was living with Sasuke-kun?! And shopping for him too! She probably cooked for him as well, or cleaned….

"You're just a maid!" Ami grinned victoriously at Alice, "you're just some hired help that Sasuke-kun took pity on! You probably lived at some brothel and Sasuke-kun was so kind to let a slut like you stay with him!"

Alice looked at the girl incredulously, "that's cool. Now I need to be somewhere, so can you move your offensive presence from my fabulous one? I don't need you tarnishing it." She hoisted her full basket onto her arm and linked arms with a smug Sakura. "Excuse me Ami-san." Alice brushed past the shocked looking girl and continued her way down the street.

Ami recovered from Alice's casual dismissal in time to shout out at her. "YOU'RE JUST SOME SLUT WHO'S MAKING UP STORIES THAT YOU LIVE WITH SASUKE-KUN!"

Alice merely stuck her hand up and waved without turning around, "I'LL TELL HIM YOU SAY HI OKAY?!"

* * *

**Alice P.O.V.**

"Ami says hi."

Sasuke twitched slightly, "what the hell do you mean?"

I smirked slightly at his grumpy expression, "some stalker chick from your academy years thinks I'm your personal slut." I looked thoughtful for a moment, "or that I'm a slut who lies about living with you. I really don't know, that girl needed to get her priorities straight."

Sasuke just grunted at me and went back to brooding on the ground as we waited for Kakashi.

I stuck my tongue out at him and turned to Sakura, "I was so proud of you trash talking her imōto! She didn't know what hit her!" I put on a tearful face, "my little girl all grown up! Flipping off other girls with her witty words, I think I might cry from happiness."

"Yeah, yeah," Sakura sighed, "proud nee-san moment and all." She then perked up slightly, "but it did feel good to tell her off. She used to bully me heaps when I was in the academy."

I saw Sasuke glance at her curiously from where he was sitting, "you were bullied?"

Sakura didn't blush at the fact that her crush was talking to her, she twitched slightly but didn't respond differently than she would to me or anyone else. "Yeah I was really bullied in my first year of the academy and even before, but after I made friends with Ino and got more confident, they didn't bother me. The only person who constantly bothered me throughout my years was that girl Ami, but Alice easily brushed her off today."

"Not after you chewed her out," I commented.

"Mn," Sakura agreed before going back to reading the large book in her lap.

I glanced over her shoulder to see medical jargon all over the page with a few confusing diagrams. Some of the words I knew from my mum but they were mixed up with ninja related words that didn't seem to add up.

"What part of medical mumbo-jumbo are you reading Sakura-chan?"

She didn't glance up from her reading, "just revising over flesh wounds so I can begin to practise using medical chakra on actual humans!"

I looked at her quizzically, "actual humans?"

"Mn," she agreed, "I managed to heal some bird's wounds last week, and I even managed to heal a large cut on a dog's paw before."

"Wow Sakura-chan," I beamed down at the girl, "I'm really proud of you! Already up to practical application after only a few weeks of studying, truly you have great potential."

Finally Sakura looked up from her book with a blush adorning her face, "y-you think so?"

I nodded, "I know so."

I knew she was going to become a medic nin greater than Tsunade herself! A true inspiration to all kunoichi out there, and since she had started early, she could become even greater.

Sakura smiled sincerely up at me, "thanks Alice, you don't know how nice it is to hear that."

I simply nodded again, "I'm happy to say the truth anytime Sakura-chan." I slowly sat down and leant against Sakura's back, both of us content to simply sit in comfortable silence. Neither Sasuke nor Sakura felt like training before actual training, and Naruto wasn't here yet, that meant no spars since we all promised all four of us would have to be here to spar.

"Sakura."

Both Sakura and I jolted at Sasuke's sudden speaking. I twisted around Sakura to see that he stood in front of Sakura with his hand sticking out in front of her book.

I could feel Sakura's heartbeat quicken at her (hopefully) old crush's proximity, "what is it Sasuke-kun?"

No stutter or blushing. Superb.

Sasuke didn't reply, instead he grabbed a kunai from his pouch and cut a thin line across the palm of his hand.

Blood pooled in his hand but he was careful not to let any drip onto the book underneath his hand. Sakura would kill even him if one of her precious books were tarnished. Trust me, I've seen it happen, and it was awesome.

I looked at the hand critically, "I didn't think you would be an emo in public Sasuke. Those displays are usually done at home, not in public."

He scowled darkly at me before offering his hand to Sakura again, "heal it."

I sighed lightly, "so blunt emo-boy. You've gotta say please once in a while, like right now. A 'please heal my stupidly self-harmed cut on my hand Sakura.' But noooooooo, you have to be an antisocial douche with the manners of a five year old."

"Shut up Alice," Sasuke glared at me.

I tapped my chin thoughtfully, "I realise that a lot of people have been saying that to me today. I wonder why?"

"Because you're an annoying bitch?" Sasuke growled at me before turning back to Sakura, "just heal my hand already Sakura."

He looked across at the dark look I plastered on my face. "Please."

Sakura merely nodded before hesitantly bringing her right hand up to hover over Sasuke's wounded hand.

I watched intently as I felt Sakura's chakra spike slightly. I then flicked my gaze towards Sasuke's blood covered hand and back to Sakura's own hand that was faintly glowing blue. She could do this.

The light blue wavered before flickering a pale green. It instantly turned back to blue but Sakura concentrated more intently on the job at hand. It flickered a few more times before it stayed a pale green glow that surrounded her hand.

I bit my lip nervously as Sakura slowly pressed her hand to Sasuke's palm. She ignored the blood that covered her own hand and continued to keep her hand a steady green colour.

After a minute of watching Sakura's green hand, she pulled away from Sasuke and slumped slightly, "oh that was hard." She rubbed her hand tiredly as she panted lightly, "how does it look Sasuke-kun?"

Said boy was currently wiping the slightly dry blood from his hand. I stood up and looked at the palm…that was perfectly healed.

"YOU DID IT SAKURA-CHAN!" I picked up the pinkette and twirled her around, "YOU ARE AN AMAZING MEDIC!"

She blinked disbelievingly, "I did it?"

I put her down on the ground and tugged Sasuke's hand so she could see it, "damn straight you did! It's perfectly healed and it doesn't hurt, does it?"

Sasuke tugged his hand back and shook his head, "no it doesn't."

He then looked slightly hesitant before lightly touching his fingers to her arm, "you did good Sakura…thank you."

I really thought she was going to pass out then.

Luckily she pulled herself together and nodded to Sasuke, "thank you for your kind compliment Sasuke-kun."

He grunted in reply before going back to his spot under the tree to brood. I guess he used all his kindness up for the day.

I perked up and turned to Sakura, "if you can take a chance and make a breakthrough, so can I!"

She blinked, "what the hell are you talking about?"

I bounced lightly on my toes as Sakura rubbed the blood off her hand, "if you can do an amazing new jutsu, so can I!"

"What jutsu are you going to try?" Sakura looked at me curiously, "and why haven't you tried it before?"

"Because I was too chicken, "I said offhandedly, "but after watching you I'm going to risk it!"

She looked at me disbelievingly, "I only know how to heal flesh wounds that are extremely minor! If you're scared to try this jutsu, I'm sure I can't heal it!"

I waved her off, "nah just watch out if I pass out or something. My chakra levels is the only thing I'm worried about, or any side effects really."

"What's the jutsu?" Sasuke asked from his emo corner.

I grinned at him before summoning up a large sum of my chakra. I carefully made a ram seal before making a snake and a tiger after it.

I had watched Naruto do this multiple times and had gotten both he and Anko (with a bribe of dango) to explain it to me. I was sure I could do this!

"Kage bushin no jutsu!"

I felt half of my chakra be sucked out of me in a huge puff of smoke, making me gasp lightly at the slight tiredness that fell across my shoulders.

I frantically blew away the smoke so I could see if I had created a clone or not. Hopefully it wasn't like my attempt at the bushin before Kakashi had made me do all those chakra control exercises.

Unfortunately, it was exactly like my first attempt of a bushin.

A pale, and extremely blurred, mass of chakra lay at my feet. I could the impression of arms and legs jutting out of it, but they were deformed and frankly disturbing. The one improvement was that the torso actually looked like mine, despite my clothes more like being black paint slathered onto it. I could also see a rather good shape of my head squashed into the torso, unfortunately it was a brownish circle-thing with no features.

"That's no bushin," choked out Sakura before she began to laugh loudly.

"I've got to agree with Sakura," smirked Sasuke, "usuratonkachi."

I huffed lightly, "at least I can sort-of do the kage bushin, just needs more practise." I poked the thing with my foot and watched as it poofed out of existence, "I was too freaked out about doing the actual jutsu. I need to work on the shape manipulation of the jutsu, basic shape first and then go from there. I need detailing because that's more important, a look-a-like of me with no personality is better than nothing."

I hummed as I began to analyse the technique. I had no clue why Naruto looked so filthy and scratched after he practised the jutsu, I only had to guess that he got frustrated and broke poor trees. I knew though, that shape manipulation was very important in a jutsu like this, something I believe Naruto was fairly good at. He got kage bushin in only a couple of hours and the shape manipulation of the Rasengan only took a day or two.

Shape manipulation it is.

"I'm going to the library later on," I declared as I prepared to try the jutsu one more time.

"Are you going to see you friend at the desk?" Sasuke said cockily from his corner.

I glared at him as I formed a ram seal, "you promised to never talk of that incidence again douchebag."

I flicked my hair at him and formed the snake and tiger seal.

The backlash of giving up half of my chakra was bigger this time, I felt like someone was actively pushing me down, that's how tired I was.

The cloud of smoke cleared to show a much better attempt of the jutsu. The kage bushin was still collapsed boneless on the ground, bones was something I needed to work on. The torso now was separate from the head by a slightly wobbly neck, the head actually an oval shape that was sharper and clearer. Arms stuck out awkwardly from the centre of the torso, not quite right there, and a bit short. Also they might need hands. The legs were by far the worst, mere logs that stuck out from the rough waist. They had no definition between the calves and thighs, not even a hint of knees and feet were non-existent.

I shrugged lightly as I looked at it critically, "could be better."

Kicking it to dispel it, I sat down and glanced towards Sasuke who had an odd look on his face. Shrugging that off, I lay back on the grass, I was going to be tired for the physical training Kakashi had promised us yesterday.

* * *

Anko grinned wickedly at me from the centre of the cellar-like room we always trained in. "You said Scarecrow had done some physical exercise with you earlier on," a proud look crossed her face, "but I bet he had nothing on our taijutsu lesson! Did he?!"

I panted harshly as I tried to get air into my protesting lungs, my arms and legs were dead weights hanging off my somehow standing body. I wearily shook my head at Anko as my chakra slowly began to recover. She had taught me to use my chakra to enhance my body but I had never been allowed to use it in training before. I wonder why she had tonight?

"You also said you had been practising the kage bushin."

I stiffened and stared fearfully at Anko's happy face, she wouldn't….

Her mockingly raised eyebrow shattered what hope I had for a theory based night on poisons that I normally enjoyed.

"I bet you didn't even take it that far…."

Yep. Goodbye world, I occasionally loved you.

* * *

**SO here's a chapter to make up my silence.**

**Do you know what else? I got heaps of reviews for my angsty/fluff chapter before! Yay for controversial chapters!**

**A quick thing here 'cos I know a lot of people will bitch about this.**

'**Kage bushin? How unoriginal.'**

'**She's too powerful, what a Mary-sue.'**

'**She can't use kage bushin, that's Naruto's technique!'**

**Umm, kage bushin is a jutsu that I believe to be a kinjustu for people who are below chunin or jōnin. In the Chunin exams, the proctors commented on how Naruto used kage bushin, they were surprised, but at the fact that a genin had used it. It actually seems like a well-known jutsue, just not that common. Alice won't be spamming clones like Naruto and using them whenever she wants, it's for the purpose of one or two clones to help her scout and spy. She won't be able to do taijuu kage bushin, just five tops at this time.**

**She's not powerful either. We now know she can do the bushin and that's about it. She's been practising the henge, but that's still ongoing. Kawarimi will be later but either than the bushin, she can't do any techniques. She can now amplify her body with chakra but that's easy. She's doing physical conditioning and weaponry will come up in the future. Kakashi is making her do team exercises with Team Seven and chakra control. She's not powerful.**

**And kage bushin being Naruto's technique? Well if Kishimoto had filled out some more plot holes, the shinobi of all countries would be using it more often. They have enough chakra and it was never stated that kage bushin was a kinjutsu since it was a Konoha jutsu. In fact, it was for the fact that it consumed too much chakra.**

**It also took me awhile to get this chapter out because I had a bit of writer's block. Here's what I tried to write earlier, think of it as a omake.**

* * *

**Special Feature: Omake 1- Foreign foods**

**Sasuke P.O.V (Holy shiznit!)**

I slowly rolled out of bed a few minutes after Alice had _finally _gotten out of my bed.

The damn girl insisted on lying in _my _bed for as long as she could. She had only decided to get out because I had kicked her out myself.

She is so annoying.

I muffled a yawn and slowly made my way downstairs and to the kitchen where Alice was most certainly was going to be. She had a veracious appetite, luckily though, she was polite enough to eat properly. Unlike a certain blond he knew.

As I walked into the kitchen, I stopped and stared as Alice navigated my kitchen like she was born in it. After only what…..six weeks? Seven weeks? Of living here, she could easily find any of the utensils and food.

I wasn't too sure if that was a good thing.

Slowly I walked over to the counter and looked at the spread of ingredients Alice had spread out on it.

There was some self-raising flour I never knew I had, along with eggs, milk and some sugar.

I didn't know what she was attempting to make with this stuff. I knew how to cook fairly well-living alone makes you desperate to learn how to cook something either than microwavable food-but I had a basic plan for breakfast.

I either ate some toast or nothing. And it was usually the nothing.

A sharp crack drew my attention to Alice as she began to add the eggs to the other ingredients in a large bowl. She mixed them around even as she began to heat a pan on the stove that was behind her.

A happy humming was coming from Alice as she put butter into the pan and watched it melt. A sizzling sound emanated from the pan when she poured the batter from the bowl, the batter forming a creamy round shape in the centre.

I scrutinised whatever the hell Alice was cooking, "how do you know how to cook so well?"

"I cooked two basic meals Sasuke," snorted Alice, "that's not cooking well."

Taking the rest of the batter in the bowl and pouring it into a measuring cup, Alice quickly checked on whatever was in the pan. "Hmmm, your pan cooks pancakes really well."

I blinked, "what the hell are pancakes?"

Alice gasped in horror and whirled to face me, "you poor boy! How could you be deprived of the goodness called pancakes?!" She grabbed my arm and shook it, "I feel for you right now. The feels."

"I didn't know what that other meal you cooked was," I reminded her," spa-spagen-spagenti boli-"

"Spaghetti Bolognese."

I nodded, "that."

Alice continued to make a fuss, "but how could you not know **pancakes**! Next you'll say you haven't had apple pie or something like pizza here!"

I frowned slightly, "yes we have apple pies..but what is pi-za?"

Alice gaped at me before her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she fainted.

Staring incredulously at the girl sprawled out on my kitchen floor, I slowly nudged her with my foot and slid her out of the way.

I turned to the pancake that was currently sizzling on my pan, "now what the hell am I meant to do with you?"

* * *

I heard a sigh as Alice woke up and slowly scrambled up off the cold floor of the kitchen, "dear Jashin my head hurts. I can't believe I passed out again."

I shifted awkwardly on my feet before shoving the spatula in my hand into her face, "you can finish breakfast."

She readily grabbed the utensil and skipped across to the pan.

I watched as her face morphed to one of confusion, "Sasuke? Where's the pancake batter that I had on the pan? I know I was only out for a bit so it couldn't have been finished. Don't tell me you ate it raw!"

I nodded to myself, "so that's why it stuck so well."

Alice was glared at me sceptically, "what do you mean by that my dear Sasuke? Bed-buddy of the night, what have you done to my pancakes?"

I scowled at the name but obediently pointed upwards.

Alice looked up to see a new addition of a large creamy circle on Sasuke's ceiling.

"Wha-" was all she managed to get out before the half cooked pancake fell and splatted down on her face.

The glare Alice gave me froze my blood, "**Sasukeeeee**!"

* * *

**Sasuke OOC but that's it though, thanks for reading!**


End file.
